Adventures of the Seoul

We've moved...

2009-03-09T21:27:00.000-07:00

I'm blogging again. But, not here.

www.jackisinkorea2009.blogspot.com

Slate...

2008-10-28T05:25:00.000-07:00

Why I Can't Vote for John McCain
I admire the man, but his party has been taken over by anti-intellectual extremists.
By Anne Applebaum
Monday, Oct. 27, 2008

This weekend, while reading the latest polling data on John McCain, Sarah Palin, and their appeal—or growing lack of it—among "independent women voters," it suddenly dawned on me: I am, in fact, one of these elusive independent woman voters, and I have the credentials to prove it. For the last couple of decades, I've sometimes voted Democratic, sometimes Republican. I'm even a registered independent, though I did think of switching to the Republican Party to vote for John McCain in 2000. But because the last political party I truly felt comfortable with was Margaret Thatcher's Conservative Party (I lived in England in the 1980s and '90s), I didn't actually do it.

The larger point, though, is that if I'm not voting for McCain—and, after a long struggle, I've realized that I'm not—maybe it's worth explaining why, because I suspect there are other independent voters who feel the same way. It's not his campaign, disjointed though that's been, that finally repulses me; it's his rapidly deteriorating, increasingly anti-intellectual, no longer even recognizably conservative Republican Party. His problems are not technical, to do with ads, fund raising, and tactics, as some have suggested. They are institutional, to do with his colleagues, his advisers, and his supporters.

I should say here that I know McCain slightly: He spoke at a party given for a book I wrote a few years ago, though I think that was as much because of the subject (Communist prison camps) as the author. But it's not his personality I admire most. Far more important is his knowledge of foreign affairs, an understanding that goes well beyond an ability to guess correctly the name of the Pakistani president. McCain not only knows the names; he knows the people—and by this I mean not just foreign presidents but foreign members of parliament, journalists, generals. He goes to Germany every year, visits Vietnam often, can talk intelligently about Belarus and Uzbekistan. I've heard him do it. Let's just say that's one of the things that distinguished him, for me, from our current president, who once confessed that "this foreign-policy stuff is a little frustrating."

The second thing I liked about McCain was the deliberate distance he always kept from the nuttier wing of his party and, simultaneously, the loyalty he's shown to a recognizably conservative budgetary philosophy, something that many congressional Republicans abandoned long ago. Fiscal conservatism, balanced budgets, sober spending—all these principles have been brushed away as so much nonsense for the last eight years by Republicans more interested in grandstanding about how much they hate Washington. McCain was one of the few to keep talking about these principles. He was also one of shockingly few to understand that there is nothing American, let alone conservative, about torture and that a battle for civilized values could not be won by uncivilized means.

Finally, I admired McCain's willingness to tackle politically risky issues like immigration, the debate about which has long been drenched in hypocrisy. Those who want to ban it are illogically denying both the role that immigrants, especially the millions of illegal immigrants, already play in the American economy, as well as the improbability of forced deportations; those who want to allow it without restriction don't acknowledge the security risks. McCain tried to put together a bipartisan coalition in an effort to find a rational solution. He failed—blocked by the ideologues in his party.

But if these traits appealed to me, I'm guessing they would have appealed to other independents, too. Why, then, has McCain spent the last four months running away from them? The appointment of Sarah Palin—inspired by his closest colleagues—turned out not to be a "maverick" move but, rather, a concession to those Republicans who think foreign policy can be conducted using a series of clichés and those in his party who shout down the federal government while quietly raking in federal subsidies. Though McCain has the one of the best records of bipartisanship in the Senate, he has let his campaign appeal to his party's extremes. Though he is a true foreign-policy intellectual, his supporters cultivate ignorance and fear: Watch Sean Hannity's "Obama & Friends: History of Radicalism" if you don't believe me. Worse, in a fatal effort to appeal to the least thoughtful, most partisan elements of his base, McCain has moved away from his previous positions on torture and immigration. Maybe that's all tactics, and maybe the "real" McCain will ditch the awful ideologues after Nov. 4 if, by some miracle, he happens to win. But how can I know that will happen?

Here's what I do know: I would give anything to rewrite history and make McCain president in 2000. But in 2008, I don't think I can vote for him. Barack Obama is indeed the least experienced, least tested candidate in modern presidential history. But at least if he wins, I can be sure that the mobs who cry "terrorist" at the sound of his name will be kept away—far away—from the White House.

Rollin' On...

2008-10-21T00:21:00.000-07:00

Well, I seem to be on a roll with these blog updates. And I don't want to stop now.

First, a quick shout out to Duane and Kat who apparently both read this blog on occasion, bringing my readership up to a cool half dozen.

As for other things on my mind...

I have a penpal in Ireland that I have written to for over a year and a half. We met for nine hours on April 2nd, 2007. He recommended three books, one of which was sitting on my nightstand at home. As we drank he was crass, arrogant and intellectually curious. An excellent combination. We started emailing the very next day. We now have over 700 emails between us... Averaging more than one email a day for over 550 days. And about four weeks ago I stopped writing. I don't really know why. I continue to care deeply about the person, but I just stopped. Nothing dramatic or final, I just couldn't conjure words to type. He didn't wonder where I was or what happened, because maybe it just seemed natural that we would eventually flicker and then fade. I often consider him to have been the light to my fuse, resulting in a series of violent and positive explosions that rattled my once a mundane life... But, something seems lost. I wish I knew what it was. Maybe then it would be easier to find again.

In other news... Thailand. Wow. I am looking forward to Thailand in three weeks. I think I included it in the last post, but I have plans to pet tigers and ride elephants. I'm going to be in Bangkok during the full moon so I'll be going dancing on the beach at a full moon party that draws 10,000 people every month. I'll spend a few afternoons laying on the beach, letting my pale skin blind the other beach-goers while I drink potent concoctions. Mmmm... I want to leave today.

But, since I can't leave today I'll have to rely upon my kindergarten students to tide me over. Today, one of the little girls pulled my arm so that I would crouch down to her height. She wrapped her arms around my head and pulled my ear close so that she could whisper, "I love Jacki Teacher." And not to be outdone, while I was already hunched on the floor, Mike wanted to smell my hair and give me a hug while Chris wanted to give me a dozen kisses on my face, head and elbow.

What constantly amazes me about my little kids is just how little they are. They are the tiniest, littlest people with totally unpredictable minds. They can cause incredible amounts of damage when their energy is focused, but if someone takes the pink crayon their world collapses. Mike started crying in class today for an unknown reason. I was reading a story to the class and he just broke into tears. I looked over to see what was wrong and reached my hand toward him. That was encouragement enough, because he crawled across the floor and sat in my lap. He just curled into a ball on my lap, held onto my sweater and watched me turn the pages of the book while the tears dried on his cheek. I was astonished at how loud and disruptive his wails could be and then how tiny he was on my lap. Like a small tornado that suddenly calms.

Graduate school apps are due within the next three-five weeks. I am working frantically and I hate it. I'd forgotten how ridiculous these can be, especially when all the materials I need are 6000 miles away. I have to mail letters of recommendation forms back to professors that are on the other side of the planet and then get them sent back to me. BUT, I am moving apartments and jobs so the address I can use to have the letters sent back keeps changing! It is enough to make a girl lose sleep at night... In fact, I should be sleeping right now, but I am blogging in order to avoid working on the apps and therefore losing more sleep! What a vicious circle.

Alright... Here is the plan. Stop blogging. Go jogging. Use the adrenaline from jogging to power through another school's application.

Ready. Set. Go.

Yes, sir...

2008-10-20T08:51:00.000-07:00

Breaks Over...

2008-10-18T23:58:00.001-07:00

Aaron Sorkin Conjures a Meeting of Obama and Bartlet
By MAUREEN DOWD

Now that he’s finally fired up on the soup-line economy, Barack Obama knows he can’t fade out again. He was eager to talk privately to a Democratic ex-president who could offer more fatherly wisdom — not to mention a surreptitious smoke — and less fraternal rivalry. I called the “West Wing” creator Aaron Sorkin (yes, truly) to get a read-out of the meeting. This is what he wrote:

BARACK OBAMA knocks on the front door of a 300-year-old New Hampshire farmhouse while his Secret Service detail waits in the driveway. The door opens and OBAMA is standing face to face with former President JED BARTLET.

BARTLET Senator.

OBAMA Mr. President.

BARTLET You seem startled.

OBAMA I didn’t expect you to answer the door yourself.

BARTLET I didn’t expect you to be getting beat by John McCain and a Lancôme rep who thinks “The Flintstones” was based on a true story, so let’s call it even.

OBAMA Yes, sir.

BARTLET Come on in.

BARTLET leads OBAMA into his study.

BARTLET That was a hell of a convention.

OBAMA Thank you, I was proud of it.

BARTLET I meant the Republicans. The Us versus Them-a-thon. As a Democrat I was surprised to learn that I don’t like small towns, God, people with jobs or America. I’ve been a little out of touch but is there a mandate that the vice president be skilled at field dressing a moose —

OBAMA Look —

BARTLET — and selling Air Force Two on eBay?

OBAMA Joke all you want, Mr. President, but it worked.

BARTLET Imagine my surprise. What can I do for you, kid?

OBAMA I’m interested in your advice.

BARTLET I can’t give it to you.

OBAMA Why not?

BARTLET I’m supporting McCain.

OBAMA Why?

BARTLET He’s promised to eradicate evil and that was always on my “to do” list.

OBAMA O.K. —

BARTLET And he’s surrounded himself, I think, with the best possible team to get us out of an economic crisis. Why, Sarah Palin just said Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac had “gotten too big and too expensive to the taxpayers.” Can you spot the error in that statement?

OBAMA Yes, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac aren’t funded by taxpayers.

BARTLET Well, at least they are now. Kind of reminds you of the time Bush said that Social Security wasn’t a government program. He was only off by a little — Social Security is the largest government program.

OBAMA I appreciate your sense of humor, sir, but I really could use your advice.

BARTLET Well, it seems to me your problem is a lot like the problem I had twice.

OBAMA Which was?

BARTLET A huge number of Americans thought I thought I was superior to them.

OBAMA And?

BARTLET I was.

OBAMA I mean, how did you overcome that?

BARTLET I won’t lie to you, being fictional was a big advantage.

OBAMA What do you mean?

BARTLET I’m a fictional president. You’re dreaming right now, Senator.

OBAMA I’m asleep?

BARTLET Yes, and you’re losing a ton of white women.

OBAMA Yes, sir.

BARTLET I mean tons.

OBAMA I understand.

BARTLET I didn’t even think there were that many white women.

OBAMA I see the numbers, sir. What do they want from me?

BARTLET I’ve been married to a white woman for 40 years and I still don’t know what she wants from me.

OBAMA How did you do it?

BARTLET Well, I say I’m sorry a lot.

OBAMA I don’t mean your marriage, sir. I mean how did you get America on your side?

BARTLET There again, I didn’t have to be president of America, I just had to be president of the people who watched “The West Wing.”

OBAMA That would make it easier.

BARTLET You’d do very well on NBC. Thursday nights in the old “ER” time slot with “30 Rock” as your lead-in, you’d get seven, seven-five in the demo with a 20, 22 share — you’d be selling $450,000 minutes.

OBAMA What the hell does that mean?

BARTLET TV talk. I thought you’d be interested.

OBAMA I’m not. They pivoted off the argument that I was inexperienced to the criticism that I’m — wait for it — the Messiah, who, by the way, was a community organizer. When I speak I try to lead with inspiration and aptitude. How is that a liability?

BARTLET Because the idea of American exceptionalism doesn’t extend to Americans being exceptional. If you excelled academically and are able to casually use 690 SAT words then you might as well have the press shoot video of you giving the finger to the Statue of Liberty while the Dixie Chicks sing the University of the Taliban fight song. The people who want English to be the official language of the United States are uncomfortable with their leaders being fluent in it.

OBAMA You’re saying race doesn’t have anything to do with it?

BARTLET I wouldn’t go that far. Brains made me look arrogant but they make you look uppity. Plus, if you had a black daughter —

OBAMA I have two.

BARTLET — who was 17 and pregnant and unmarried and the father was a teenager hoping to launch a rap career with “Thug Life” inked across his chest, you’d come in fifth behind Bob Barr, Ralph Nader and a ficus.

OBAMA You’re not cheering me up.

BARTLET Is that what you came here for?

OBAMA No, but it wouldn’t kill you.

BARTLET Have you tried doing a two-hour special or a really good Christmas show?

OBAMA Sir —

BARTLET Hang on. Home run. Right here. Is there any chance you could get Michelle pregnant before the fall sweeps?

OBAMA The problem is we can’t appear angry. Bush called us the angry left. Did you see anyone in Denver who was angry?

BARTLET Well ... let me think. ...We went to war against the wrong country, Osama bin Laden just celebrated his seventh anniversary of not being caught either dead or alive, my family’s less safe than it was eight years ago, we’ve lost trillions of dollars, millions of jobs, thousands of lives and we lost an entire city due to bad weather. So, you know ... I’m a little angry.

OBAMA What would you do?

BARTLET GET ANGRIER! Call them liars, because that’s what they are. Sarah Palin didn’t say “thanks but no thanks” to the Bridge to Nowhere. She just said “Thanks.” You were raised by a single mother on food stamps — where does a guy with eight houses who was legacied into Annapolis get off calling you an elitist? And by the way, if you do nothing else, take that word back. Elite is a good word, it means well above average. I’d ask them what their problem is with excellence. While you’re at it, I want the word “patriot” back. McCain can say that the transcendent issue of our time is the spread of Islamic fanaticism or he can choose a running mate who doesn’t know the Bush doctrine from the Monroe Doctrine, but he can’t do both at the same time and call it patriotic. They have to lie — the truth isn’t their friend right now. Get angry. Mock them mercilessly; they’ve earned it. McCain decried agents of intolerance, then chose a running mate who had to ask if she was allowed to ban books from a public library. It’s not bad enough she thinks the planet Earth was created in six days 6,000 years ago complete with a man, a woman and a talking snake, she wants schools to teach the rest of our kids to deny geology, anthropology, archaeology and common sense too? It’s not bad enough she’s forcing her own daughter into a loveless marriage to a teenage hood, she wants the rest of us to guide our daughters in that direction too? It’s not enough that a woman shouldn’t have the right to choose, it should be the law of the land that she has to carry and deliver her rapist’s baby too? I don’t know whether or not Governor Palin has the tenacity of a pit bull, but I know for sure she’s got the qualifications of one. And you’re worried about seeming angry? You could eat their lunch, make them cry and tell their mamas about it and God himself would call it restrained. There are times when you are simply required to be impolite. There are times when condescension is called for!

OBAMA Good to get that off your chest?

BARTLET Am I keeping you from something?

OBAMA Well, it’s not as if I didn’t know all of that and it took you like 20 minutes to say.

BARTLET I know, I have a problem, but admitting it is the first step.

OBAMA What’s the second step?

BARTLET I don’t care.

OBAMA So what about hope? Chuck it for outrage and put-downs?

BARTLET No. You’re elite, you can do both. Four weeks ago you had the best week of your campaign, followed — granted, inexplicably — by the worst week of your campaign. And you’re still in a statistical dead heat. You’re a 47-year-old black man with a foreign-sounding name who went to Harvard and thinks devotion to your country and lapel pins aren’t the same thing and you’re in a statistical tie with a war hero and a Cinemax heroine. To these aged eyes, Senator, that’s what progress looks like. You guys got four debates. Get out of my house and go back to work.

OBAMA Wait, what is it you always used to say? When you hit a bump on the show and your people were down and frustrated? You’d give them a pep talk and then you’d always end it with something. What was it ...?

BARTLET “Break’s over.”

Obama vs. The Gays...

2008-10-18T23:54:00.001-07:00

Obama vs. McCain vs. Gay Marriage
In California, the presidential race is taking a back seat to gay marriage.
By Farhad Manjoo
Posted Wednesday, Oct. 15, 2008, at 4:00 PM ET

No one doubts that Barack Obama will win California by a double-digit margin this year. In some northern counties, he may well hit 90 percent. Yet politics in this nonswing blue state still defy prediction. California's 2008 ballot is a thicket of closely contested, closely watched social issues. And on some of the biggest questions, blue voters—in one case, the very same voters that Obama is counting on—look ready to swing red.

Among other state initiatives, Californians will vote on a measure to ban gay marriage; to require parental notification for abortions for minors; and to institute a program of rehabilitation, rather than incarceration, for nonviolent drug offenders. Even the beasts have a stake in the election: Proposition 2 requires that cows, pigs, chickens, and other farm animals "be allowed, for the majority of the day, to fully extend their limbs or wings, lie down, stand up and turn around." (The New York Times has come out in favor of the measure, while a number of local papers, including the Los Angeles Times, oppose it on grounds that it'll damage the state's huge agriculture industry.) In surveys, a large majority of voters say they'll pull the lever in the animals' favor.

But on the question of whether human beings will be allowed to lie down and extend their limbs with whomever they please, Californians are much more uncertain. In 2000, residents voted overwhelmingly to ban same-sex marriage. The state Supreme Court struck down that initiative this spring, saying such a ban required a change to the state constitution, and gay couples up and down the coast have been marrying ever since. Now comes Proposition 8, which would enshrine a ban on same-sex marriage into the California Constitution.

Early polls showed the measure tanking. Liberals were buoyed: Not only were they going to win the White House; they would also see their neighbors repudiate the 2000 vote and embrace an unmistakably libertine (if not strictly "liberal") social policy. But over the last month, proponents of Proposition 8 have pulled in more campaign cash (40 percent of it from Mormons) and launched an aggressive TV ad campaign. Now the anti-gay-marriage measure looks likely to pass. Says Yvette Martinez, political director of No on 8: "I think maybe we got a little complacent."

There's an interesting demographic wrinkle to the debate over Proposition 8. Obama has come out against the measure—but his supporters are another matter. The Democrat is expected to bring a surge of black and Latino voters to the polls on Election Day. This spells trouble for gay marriage; in some surveys (PDF), minority voters have expressed much greater support for banning same-sex marriage than have whites. Chip White, a spokesman for the pro-Proposition 8 campaign, stopped short of saying that Obama's presence on the ballot will help the measure. But he did point out that the campaign plans a big push in minority communities, especially through churches and other religious networks. "Traditional marriage initiatives have historically been supported by African-Americans," he says. "We think this one will be no different."

Martinez of the anti-Proposition 8 campaign, meanwhile, says that her side has also begun to tap minority communities, and several prominent black ministers as well as La Opinión, the large Spanish-language Los Angeles daily, oppose the gay-marriage ban. Still, Martinez concedes, minority voters could be a problem. "We think these communities have to hear our message a little stronger," she says.

Late last month, the Proposition 8 campaign hit on what seems to be its most effective argument against gay marriage: that if the court's ruling stands, kindergartners will be "indoctrinated" into the gay lifestyle. They've pushed the message in a couple of goofily creative TV ads now blanketing the airwaves. The more outrageous spot features a girl who comes home from school to show her mother a book her teacher has given her—King & King, a fairy tale about a young prince who doesn't show much interest in getting together with a princess. "I learned how a prince can marry a prince and I can marry a princess!" the girl in the ad tells her mother. An announcer declares that under California law, schools are required to teach kids about marriage, and that even if parents object, "teaching children about gay marriage will happen here unless we pass Proposition 8." The Proposition 8 slogan: "Protect Our Children. Restore Marriage."

The first time I saw these ads, I thought Proposition 8 was sunk: Is this the best the anti-gay marriage side can muster? An obviously tangential "Think of the children!" campaign? What's more, the ad is misleading: Although state law offers health-education guidelines for school districts to follow, it does not mandate a curriculum, and it explicitly allows parents to pull children out of any health classes they may find objectionable. In the summer, when the Proposition 8 campaign attempted to add language about schools teaching gay marriage on the statewide ballot pamphlet, a Sacramento Court found the claim "false and misleading."

But then, last week, a school in San Francisco arranged for a class of first graders to take a field trip to City Hall to toss rose petals and blow bubbles at their lesbian teacher's wedding. The trip, which has set conservative blogs on fire, seemed tailor-made to prop up the anti-gay marriage side's argument—San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom, whose cocky stand on the issue doesn't play well in other parts of the state, even officiated at the wedding. In May, Newsom told a cheering crowd of supporters that gay marriage is going to be legal "whether you like it or not," a quote that has ended up in ads by people who don't like it. Now the Proposition 8 campaign has a concrete example of schoolkids being forced to hew to San Francisco's gay agenda, and they're sure to pummel voters with that message in the days before the election.

From afar, California is often seen as a liberal haven. Sure, Bill Clinton won the state by 14 points in 1992, and ever since, the state's electoral horde—55 votes, 20 percent of the threshold necessary to win the White House—have been a lock for Democrats. Yet between 1952 and 1988, the Golden State burned bright red, voting for a Democratic presidential candidate only once (Lyndon Johnson in 1964). Nixon and Reagan—homestate boys—won handily, and in 1988, George H.W. Bush eked out a respectable margin. And voters here have a history of passing conservative ballot initiatives. Yes, we've legalized medical marijuana and funded stem cell research; but we have also severely restricted property taxes, denied medical services to illegal immigrants, prohibited affirmative action at public universities, and forced sex offenders to wear GPS tracking devices. Californians have twice rejected measures to require minors to inform their parents before seeking abortions, but polls suggest that the proposal will pass this year.

At least 11,000 same-sex couples have gotten married in California since the summer, and now many are rushing to get hitched before their fellow citizens close the door for good. Slots for gay weddings at San Francisco City Hall are booked through the election. Ceremonies take place every Friday. Whether those marriages will still be legal if Proposition 8 passes is a matter of intense legal debate. But for now, at least, watching the brides and grooms stream out of the rotunda is a wonderful way to spend the afternoon.

She returns...

2008-10-17T02:08:00.000-07:00

It has been an extraordinarily long time since I last blogged and I have no excuse. I guess I’ve been too busy living to bother reflecting or informing. Slightly selfish, I’ll admit. But, dear god there are new developments… I’ll just take off and see where this leads.

First, my hagwon is going bankrupt. Wow! They are closing at the end of this month so
I have two weeks to find another job. The closing of the hagwon creates numerous problems and opportunities.

Problems...

1. I have only 9 more weeks left on my contract. No one will want to hire me for only 9 weeks.
2. The hagwon pays for my apartment so I’ll have to find a new place to live.
3. Without a job, I can’t save money. The whole point of moving here was to save money.
4. The hagwon pays for my cell phone. I’ll have to get a new phone.
5. The hagwon owes me salary for October. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.
6. The hagwon owes me my bonus for completing my contract. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.
7. The hagwon owes me a plane ticket home. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.

Opportunities...

1. I only have 9 more weeks left… I can work part-time and teach private lessons. With just a couple odd jobs I can triple my hourly salary and probably make even more money than if I stayed at the hagwon.
2. I’ll just see if they’ll let me pay for the next two months of my apartment. If not, I’ll find someplace else to crash. This problem is totally solvable.
3. Saving money? See Opportunity #1
4. No cell phone? So, I’ll buy a new cell phone. Or get my current phone put onto my credit card. Whatever.
5. They’ll pay me or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.
6. They’ll pay me or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.
7. They’ll buy the plane ticket or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.

BONUS Opportunities...

1. I was already planning on going to Thailand in November. And now, since I have all this time to do whatever I want, I think I’ll just extend my trip and go to Vietnam!
2. I work on Sundays, but now I won’t have to. Sundays are all mine again! Late brunch with tea and good company. That’s the very definition of Sunday.
3. I was going to go home three days after Christmas. Now, I’ll be home in time for Christmas.
3. Change! I like change. I was getting bored and dreading the next nine weeks, now I’ll be flying by the seat of my pants.

So, I think this whole situation is going to be a blessing in disguise.

In other news…
The value of the won is taking a nose dive. What a nightmare! It is down about 25% to the dollar since I arrived, so I’ve lost about 25% of the money I earned if I convert it to dollars. Since I am definitely coming back to Seoul to go to grad school, I’ve decided to leave as much as possible in won. I’ll take out a few million won for my trip home, but leave the rest in Korea and pray for a better exchange rate!

Grad School...
Applications are happening. I’m finishing them, turning them in and crossing my fingers.

Birthdays...
I turned 24. I am now a twenty-something... A mid-twenties kind of girl. I think 24 is going to be a good year. In fact, the year started out pretty great with a fantastic birthday celebration. It was a night of drinking, kissing and dancing.

First, the drinking. There was lots of it. But, the best part was the free drinks. I don’t think I paid for a drink all night. And I even had a couple strangers walk up and say “Someone told me it’s your birthday and that I should buy you a shot.” So, I kept being pleasantly surprised by a variety of fruity shots. But, since I have clever friends, the people bringing me shots were all handsome men. I don’t really remember any of their names, so I just started labeling them "Cute Boy #1""Cute Boy #2" and so on.

And now onto the kissing... What free shot would be complete without a kiss on the cheek? My cheeks got a lot of action. I even had a few ask if I'd kiss them on the cheek. And being drunk and flirty and 24, I was happy to oblige.

And finally, the dancing! We danced at Wolfhound. Others went to the club, but at Wolfhound they played Jailhouse Rock and Sweet Caroline and all the classics that everyone knows. I just sang along and let the good times roll. Besides, if I had gone to the club it would have just been thumping techno with no room to move. I needed room to dance and breath and rock!

But, before I move on... Let me share the wonder of Wolfhound, my favorite bar! Wolfhound has become the hangout for me and all my friends... We go there almost every weekend. There are a couple other popular foreigner bars, but this one is particularly cool because it is a little out of the way. You have to go off the main road and down a back street to get to it. And, more European, Australians and New Zealanders hang out there, so there are fewer rowdy and crass boys and more cute boys with accents. And, since our crowd always hangs out there, we’ve started to know the other “regulars.” We have a couple other groups of friends that we’ve met there and we can expect to see and hang out with whenever we go out. It has a real ‘Cheers- Where everyone knows your name” quality about it.

Speaking of “Where everyone knows your name...” About a block away from Wolfhound is Seoul Pub, which is my other favorite bar. One of the owners is named Junior and last time when my friends were in town we stayed out all night at Seoul Pub. They are open till 6am and we hung out with Junior, playing cards and darts until they shut the place down. So, now Junior knows me and whenever I come in he always says hello with gusto and plays my favorite songs. He lets me be the DJ and pick any music I want. Sometimes he’ll buy me and my friends a round of drinks “on the house.” It makes me feel like such a cool, hip gal who is “in the know.”

A few other random updates...

Song of the Moment: Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon
(This song has been on the top of my list for quite awhile now.)

Fall is here and I am in love. Crisp breezes. Gold leaves. Scarves.

A casting director approached me today on the street to be an extra in the movie “Beverly Hills Ninja 2.” They are filming here in Korea. Maybe I’ll call them. Why not, right? It could be my big break!

I fell down yesterday. I just fell over. I thought it was pretty funny, since falling down is a pretty infrequent occurrence. I mean, think about it... When was the last time you just fell down. Didn't trip. Didn't step on a shoelace. Didn't get bumped by another person. Just one minute you're walking. The next minute you are on the floor.

I really like Holly Flax.

Book I’m Reading: Lonesome Dove
(It’s Liz’s favorite book, so I said I’d read it. Actually, surprisingly good.)

Current Color of my Toenails: Chipped Gold

Current Color of my Mood: Yellow… with a hint of Leafy Green

Most Recent Reason to be Thankful: Billy Joel's Live Albums and English Breakfast Tea

Word of the Moment: Megalomaniac

Youtube Video of the Moment: Hey Sarah Palin”

All Dogs Go To Heaven...

2008-09-18T10:41:00.001-07:00

http://www.burnie.com/church_fight.jpg

Wow. That killed me.

Three In A Row...

2008-09-08T08:09:00.000-07:00

Having used the words of others for the last three posts, I've decided to finally add a few words of my own.

This past weekend was epic. It really was a blast in every sense of the word. I'll start at the beginning and see where I end up... So much to tell.

Well, the most noteable part of the weekend was having some cool guests. While in Hong Kong a few weeks back, Mike and I met a couple fun people. In particular a British guy who teaches English in Beijing. His specific VISA requires him to leave the country every thirty days and this month he decided to make the trek to Seoul. So, Nick and his flatmate, Luke came to see the sites and hang out in SK. They arrived late on Thursday night and we immediatly hit the bars with David and Kelly from work. Within a couple hours we met up with other pals and headed over to a giant fish market. The fish market is open 24 hours and it is HUGE. It is a giant warehouse with tanks and tanks of live fish for sale. There were giant shellfish and octopus and every kind of fish imaginable. Some of our Korean friends bought fish and we watched the fisherman actually pulled the fish out of the tank, whacked it on the head to kill it and then take a giant butcher knife and chopped off its head. It was pretty cool to watch. In another part of the fish market was a dining room and we all drank and ate the raw fish. However... there was one really interesting dish. Live octopus. The octopus was about the size of my hand and when I touched it, it moved and wiggled in the dish. I definitly had to try some. I pulled off an arm and it suctioned my tongue and my lip until I started chewing. It didn't have much of a taste, but it was really chewy. I got some good pictures. I'll be sure to post those later. We had such a good time drinking beer and soju that we didn't even realize what time it was until someone said, "Hey, I think the sun has already come up!" We finally left at 7:30 in the morning!

But, that was just the beginning. The next day Kelly, David and I were laughing at how tired and ridiculous we were for staying out so late. None of us had intended to party quite so hard and were each looking forward to going to bed early and recovering. And while David and Kelly were wise enough to follow through and get some sleep, when my Beijing friends called I decided to rally and hit the town again. We visited a bunch of my favorite haunts, but ended up at Seoul Pub where we closed the place down. As the pub cleared out, we bonded with the bartenders who gladly bought us more rounds and let us pick the music. I'm proud to say that I played every 'California' song I could find. California Love. California Girls. Californication. And, when I told him that I liked Jackson Browne he played "Doctor My Eyes" five times that night! Once again, I didn't mean to stay out so late. But, when I got in the cab the sun was just rising. It was a great time!

But, the weekend still wasn't over. Saturday was the semi and final debate rounds for the Korean tv show. So, after sleeping in and recovering from the previous night, I met up with David and we prepared for the debate. The topic of the first round was "Childbirth brings happiness to married couples." We were opposition and argued that their definition of happiness was too vague and naive. We also argued that childbirth and infancy bring incredibly amount of stress and anxiety, so while the experience may be positive overall, happiness is the wrong word to describe the experience. We won the debate so we went to the final round. The final round topic was "We should have a world government in the future." We were pro and made all the predictable arguments about how cooperation will solve problems. The other team suggested that hegemonic powers should solve problems. Obviously that is a pretty pathetic strategy, and we killed them. So, "The Scholars" are the Season 2, Face to Face champions! Hooray! After winning the show we couldn't just go home. We had to celebrate! We had a great time toasting to our good fortune and re-arguing all the debate topics. And, once again, we closed the bar down and went home at 6am.

So, this weekend was pretty jam packed. I can't remember the last time I went home when the sun was rising and I definitly can't remember a time I did it three nights in a row. But, I had a great time and I am glad I sacraficed the sleep.

On a side note... This past weekend has been just part of a series of really fun nights out with friends. A couple weeks ago I wrote my penpal an email explaining how I was very happy, but also very alone. I said that occassional lonliness was the price I pay for independence and freedom. But, these past weeks have somehow answered that "prayer." I've made a great new Navy friend, several new rugby friends and new people have been moving to and visiting Seoul. I suddenly have lots of people to talk to and spend time with. I am incredibly fortunate and have been reminded that the lonliness of independence really is only "occassional."

In short, I'm happy. I'm healthy. I'm energized and refreshed.

Dear Sen. Biden...

2008-09-08T05:43:00.000-07:00

How To Debate a Girl, and Win
Joe Biden can beat Sarah Palin by pretending she's a man. And that he's not Joe Biden.
By Dahlia Lithwick

Dear Sen. Biden:

You have a problem. In less than a month, you will face off against Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin in a vice-presidential debate in St. Louis, and were you anyone but Joe Biden, it would likely be a rout. Last week, Palin proved herself a charming, confident, and gifted reader of speeches. But that doesn't change the fact that two years ago she was the mayor of a town of 6,000, crusading against dirty books at the local library. You are a six-term senator and chairman of the Senate foreign relations committee. World leaders routinely friend you, unbidden, on Facebook ("Wait … Is this the Angela Merkel?"). World leaders had never heard of Gov. Palin until last Friday.

That's your problem, Joe. Everyone expects you to win the debate, and to trounce her on the substance. But the rules for debating Gov. Palin are different. If you lecture her, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. If you act too smart, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. If you condescend to her, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. So this longtime parliamentary debater (and longer-time female) is going to humbly offer you a few tips on how to debate a girl.

Sen. Biden, let's be clear. Great Supreme Court oral advocates will tell you that a flawless oral argument will never win a case, but a bad argument can lose one. You have a similar problem. If you engage, fight, bicker, or bluster, you can lose this debate. Think Rick Lazio. So my advice, in a nutshell: Don't lose it.

Your real problem with Palin is not actually going to be her gender. Assuming you don't gaze fixedly at her breasts or ask her to fetch you a coffee, you probably won't do anything truly career wrecking on the sexism front. Your real problem is that Palin is not a serious candidate. I don't mean to suggest that she is not a serious person or even a seriously impressive first-term governor with real potential to shake up national politics. Nor do I want to imply for an instant that Palin is not a serious competitor. I just want to state here what you will be unable to say out loud at the debate: That by every obvious metric—experience, knowledge base, decades of public service, policy experience, understanding of the world—Palin is an unserious candidate for the vice presidency of the United States. And as any college debater will tell you, it's far harder to beat a clumsy opponent than a good one. (That's why you do better in your judiciary committee hearings with John Roberts than with Alberto Gonzales.) But if you even hint that Sarah Palin may be opining on the Israel-Palestinian peace process with something Piper pulled off Wikipedia that morning, you will look like a snotty professor lecturing an undergrad. And if you look like a snotty professor, you will come across as a sexist bully.

There is no easy way to tell you this, Joe Biden, but the surest way for Joe Biden to lose a debate against Sarah Palin is by being Joe Biden. If you are windy, pompous, unctuous, or pushy, you will come across as patronizing and condescending—the guy who puts the "boy" into "old boys' network." If you flirt and smirk and flatter (Did you truly tell an Ohio crowd you thought Palin was "good-looking"? Did you really introduce us to your wife, Jill, by leering that she is "drop-dead gorgeous"?), you're going to sound like the creepy guy in the trench coat at the back of the porn theater. If you can manage to be your warm, amiable self, even if you're going batshit on the inside, you will do fine.

And that's why the best way for you to approach Sarah Palin will be to forget that she is a woman. Tell yourself that she is a machine in 3-inch heels that has been programmed to make you look brutish and aggressive. She will attack, and you will smile. She will make jokes, and you will laugh. Do whatever you need to do—take four Percocet, deploy Zen breathing techniques—to prevent yourself from attacking this woman. And do just as much not to pay attention to her. Even if she pulls out her breast pump during commercials, keep your eyes glazed over on the middle distance. No compliments. Don't say you like her shoes. Just the facts, Joe.

You will need to match Palin point for point in the blue-collar-off. If she invokes her sister's gas station, bring up your cousin's Laundromat. (Try to locate one in the coming days, if you aren't in possession of one already). If she mentions the threshers, you need to see her the threshers and raise her the bailers. If she mentions the Washington media elite that hate her, you can truthfully tell her they've been calling you a blowhard for decades.

Caution: Sarah Palin is funny. And it's the kind of jeering Ann Coulter-funny that's assuredly going to irritate the heck out of you. She'll suggest you are a coward and unpatriotic and also (heh heh) that you are corrupt and dishonest. Keep your poker face. Poker face when she says you plan to raise taxes on the middle class. Poker face when she says she has plans to sell Barack Obama's next celebrity memoir on eBay and give all the money to special-needs children. Don't lunge (a la Lazio). Don't sigh (a la Gore). Don't roll your eyes (a la Where the Wild Things Are) or look longingly into the camera as if to plead "This is the best they could find for me?" Just nod sagely and refute logically. Get off a zinger if you can. ("You're nice enough Sarah" does not constitute a zinger.) But you are not going to beat her at the victim game, or the regular-folks game, or the humor game. You have to beat her on the fact that you are qualified to be a heartbeat from the presidency and that in 10 years she may be, as well.

Take a page from Campbell Brown's book and ask politely (and like you really want to know the answer and not just hear yourself say the question) what she learned while leading the Alaska National Guard into that war against Saskatchewan. But play to your strengths. Know stuff. Say it briefly. Don't accuse her of not knowing things. Just know more. An insanely successful college debate friend told me recently that the way he won against women was by always behaving like they were men.

My senior year in college, I debated in Glasgow, Scotland, against men who all stood up when I entered the room. One guy called me a "little flower" in the quarterfinals. Welshmen asked me to fetch coffee. What I learned from that experience was how deeply glad I was to live in a country where, for the most part, a woman can argue, tell jokes, kick ass, or get her ass kicked, just like a man. In 2008, in St. Louis, against a charming, cocky Alaska governor, that will only be truer. Thank goodness we live in a time and place in which nobody expects you to pull the chair out for your opponent or compliment her brooch, and nobody will be offended if you shake her hand firmly and pound her on national security. My best advice to you for dealing with Gov. Palin? Fight like a man. She will.

Sincerely,
Dahlia Lithwick

Excerpt...

2008-09-04T05:21:00.000-07:00

San Francisco Chronicle
Mark Morford
September 3, 2008

Excerpt:

"So, on to the good news: A staggering 40 million Americans watched Obama deliver his spectacular, rain-free speech in Denver. That's more than the opening ceremony of Olympics. More than "American Idol." Half again as much as Kerry or Bush earned for similar speeches from years before and an all-time record for any televised political speech anywhere. What a thing.

And let's recall, for a moment, Obama in Berlin back in July, where nearly a quarter million locals turned up to see a man who wasn't yet even a world leader, but merely a candidate. Recall those stunning images of cheering throngs at the Victory Column, hundreds of thousands of eager, curious foreigners, all there to catch a glimpse not of Mick Jagger or the Pope, not of the Dalai Lama or Brad Pitt, but a brilliant young American senator.

That's not middling celebrity. That's not merely good PR on behalf of Obama's team. That's something else entirely, a world electrified by new possibility. Hell, McCain would be lucky to draw 100 onlookers to the airport Sheraton, and most of those would be EMTs.

Even Bill Clinton, with his effortless charisma and fantastic oratory skill, could never draw like Obama. This man fills stadiums. Electrifies not just Democrats, but entire nations. He has that rarest of political power, the ability to make people want to get out there and feel it, be part of the shift. Bush gave the world hives. McCain gives the world the creeps. Obama gives the world goosebumps. Simple as that.

You gotta admit, amidst all the GOP scandal and meltdown and Obama's revitalizing, meteoric rise to international beacon of change -- a guy who, in Joe Biden's words, has "grabbed the lightning" like no one he's ever seen before -- it's tempting to say even God has abandoned the religious right.

Then again, it's probably far more accurate to say She was never really over there in the first place."

Judging Sarah Palin

2008-09-03T06:03:00.000-07:00

Editorial
Chicago Tribune
September 2, 2008

This surely wasn't how Sarah Palin intended to tell Americans that, if elected, she’d be not only the first woman to serve as vice president, but also the first grandmother. On Monday, though, Palin disclosed that her not-yet-wed, 17-year-old daughter is five months pregnant. That word answered a tide of speculation on Internet blogs that a Palin daughter, and not Palin herself, had given birth to Trig, the family’s Down-syndrome baby; Palin, you see, must have faked a pregnancy to protect the daughter’s reputation.

But Palin's disclosure only prompted new waves of Web speculation: that the governor is a bad mother, that with two babies around she’d be too busy to serve as vice president, that she must have pressured her daughter not to simply have an abortion.

Whew. This rush to judge Sarah Palin—a woman whose name most Americans first heard just four days ago—is breathtaking. No, there has been nothing suspicious about either pregnancy in Palin's family. Time magazine's Nathan Thornburgh reported Monday that in their home town of Wasilla, Alaska, her daughter's situation "was more or less an open secret. And everyone was saying the same thing: The governor's 17-year-old daughter is pregnant, the father is her boyfriend, and it's really nobody's business beyond that."

Given the withering and deeply personal onslaught she's endured, Gov. Palin may feel like the loneliest woman in America.

She's not. Many families confront the difficult consequences of choices that young people make. Palin says her family will welcome and shelter her grandchild just as they've welcomed and sheltered Trig and her other kids. Judge me not by the situation I've been handed, she’s essentially saying. If you must judge me, judge me by how I try to respond.

That's a message sure to resonate with parents and grandparents who have watched teens in their families make decisions that were irresponsible, or irreversible, or, in the most tragic cases, life-ending or otherwise irredeemable. As one Wasilla resident, a woman who has a son fighting in Iraq and another who survived a head-crushing workplace accident, told the reporter from Time, dealing with life’s real dangers "makes you realize that a thing like a little teenage pregnancy isn't such a big deal. Bristol—and lots of other girls like her out there—are going to be just fine."

We’ll see—which by one measure is unfortunate in its own right: Teenage parenthood is difficult enough in near-anonymity. Imagine how many people will be waiting to judge Bristol Palin, mother. Just as people now are judging Sarah Palin, mother.

Barack Obama is having none of that, threatening to fire any campaign staffer advancing the attacks on Palin’s family. "People’s families are off-limits," he said Monday. "And people's children are especially off-limits. This [situation] has no relevance to Gov. Palin’s performance as a governor or her potential performance as a vice president. You know, my mother had me when she was 18, and how a family deals with issues and teenage children, that shouldn’t be a topic of our politics."

But, of course, it is. The question is how the rest of us now deal with it: by dismissing Palin as damaged goods—or by giving her the opportunity to impress or disappoint us over the next two months.

We can judge what she has or hasn’t achieved: Her inexperience in foreign affairs, for example, rivals that of John Edwards, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney—three men Americans seriously considered as candidates not for the vice presidency, but the presidency itself.

And we can watch her cope with the same household vicissitudes many parents face.

Judging Sarah Palin will be America’s parlor game from now until Nov. 4. She asked for scrutiny when she agreed to run alongside Republican John McCain. Bring it on. But the rest of us can temper our unfolding discoveries about this would-be vice president with what they tell us about her judgment and character. That’s what matters:

We have seen Obama acknowledge his youthful use of illicit drugs. We have heard John McCain confess that his own immaturity destroyed his first marriage. We have watched Joe Biden’s career suffer from disclosures of plagiarism in law school and in his 1987 campaign for the presidency.

Most Americans who've spent time assessing those personal difficulties have decided that none of these men's pasts disqualifies him to serve as president.

Sarah Palin’s record as governor, and her prospective performance as vice president, are fair game. Her family's struggles are not. If there's a conclusion to be drawn, it's about those sometimes difficult consequences of decisions that young people make. If Gov. Palin helps the rest of us advance that lesson to the teenagers in our lives, she'll deserve our gratitude rather than our sneers.

Books and Rings...

2008-09-01T08:08:00.000-07:00

No news is good news. And I have no real news. Things are fine at work. The weather is cooling and still raining. (My favorite kind of weather.) I'm making new friends who are uber cool. I'm going back on Face to Face, the debate tv show, for the semi-finals on Saturday. And while none of that is very exciting, I am reading some pretty good books.

I'm actually reading about three books at the moment. And I'm trying to branch out from American and British authors. A few weeks back I read a newspaper article that explained that the majority of books that are translated into foreign languages are originally written in English. Therefore, your average English speaker and reader is less likely to read works from foreigner authors because there are fewer foreign authors translated to English. I think this is a huge disappointment. Culture is translated through literature. And while it is always preferable to read literature in its original language, my inability to read other languages makes that impossible. Therefore, I'm trying to settle for the next best option and look for foreign authors translated to English. And recently I think I've found a couple of gems.

The first is called "Piercing" by Ryu Murakami, a highly acclaimed Japanese author. I've only just begun, but the first few chapters gave me the same sick-to-my-stomach sensation that gripped me when I read American Psycho. A successful, young Japanese man is compelled to murder weaker beings. The most vulnerable potential-victim being his own infant daughter who he watches every night with an ice pick in hand. The terrifying premise is obviously quite dark, but it has a truly Dostoevsky feel to it so I'm going to keep reading.

The next is equally dark, titled "I Have The Right To Destroy Myself" by Young-Ha Kim. I'm especially drawn to the nameless narrator of the book. Set in Seoul, the narrator guides the reader through a tragic and complicated love story while glorifying suicide. And the presentation of the story is incredibly compelling. Some characters have names, some simply are distinguished by letters and professions. I'll be sure to write more as I turn more pages.

The last book I'm reading, and the one I am closest to finishing is called "Anansi Boys" by the English author Neil Gaiman. It is fantastic! It revolves around two brother, one of whom is an American god. Gaiman has created an entire mythical world based on a combination of Greek, Roman, Chinese and Native American mythology. It's fascinating to see an entirely unique fictional culture derived from non-fictional traditions. I'm thoroughly enjoying the book.

Now that I have actually taken the time to describe these books, I'm realizing that I seem to have developed a dark, disturbing trend. I should mention that my literary choices aren't always so severe. I recently read the entire David Sedaris collection and laughed so hard I almost stopped breathing. I highly recommend his "Naked." I also indulged in "Possible Side Effects" by Augusten Burroughs who was equally hilarious, though slightly more depressing. And of course, my reading selections aren't always so lengthy. I'm more than happy to settle for the incredibly sexy and slightly vulgar word-smithing of my favorite columnist, Mark Morford. (www.sfgate.com/columnists/morford) Read it. You'll love it. Or at least lust for it.

Alright. For the two and half people who actually read this blog, feel free to add your reading recommendations.

Ah... and before I forget! Huge shout out to my best friend who is GETTING MARRIED! That's right, her Air Force guy popped the question! I guess giving up California and moving to Texas was worth it. (If you've seen the ring, then you definitely know it was worth it!) And with the engagement I'm finally giving up on the idea that she'll ditch her guy and come hang out with me in Seoul! Congrats Cynthia and Demetri!

American Women...

2008-08-29T13:35:00.000-07:00

Two women. Two parties. One election.

Someday I'm going to be a mother, an aunt, a godmother or neighbor to a little girl and I'm going to tell her that I actually saw it happen. It happened in my lifetime.

18 million cracks in the ceiling and a VP nomination.
Right or left. Red or Blue. It's a good day to be an American woman.

Blog Burner...

2008-08-24T22:05:00.000-07:00

Over the past month I have had to take a break from my kindergarten classes in order to teach summer school for my full-time hagwon. Most students are on summer break from their schools and therefore attend more classes at our private academy. But, the summer intensive schedule is over and now I am back to normal work hours, and back to teaching my kindergarten students.

Having been gone for a month, I didn't expect most of the students to remember me. Foreign teachers are a commodity and come and go frequently in Korea. Not to mention, my students are about five years old. They grant their loyalty to whichever teacher brings stickers to class. So, when I arrived at work yesterday morning and heard little feet pattering behind me I didn't pay much attention. But, it was like munchkins appearing to surround Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. Kids would just find parts of me to hug. One had my arm, while another had my leg. Little Mike smelled my hair while Grace tried to put a sticker on my shirt and Ella wanted a high-five. Mose remembered the song I taught him and started singing it to me. And this was just in the first few moments from when I walked in the front door and down the hall to the teacher's room. When I finally went to my classes, a lot of the kids wanted to show me things. Michelle (7 years old) lost her two front teeth. Kai (5 years old) finally picked an English name and wanted me to say it out loud. And Chloe (4 years old) just looked up at me when I walked in and started giggling so hard she fell over. It was the absolute best welcome-back I have ever received!

In other news, I keep a journal. (Let me be clear, I do not keep a diary. Diaries have plastic locks and pink pages. I keep a journal) A few years back I started re-reading some of my entries and came within inches of shredding entire pages. The stuff I wrote was so stupid and juvenile that I never wanted to read the entries again, let alone run the risk of having anyone else ever find them and read them. But, instead of burning the pages and burying the ashes deep underground I made the rule that if I write something in my journal, it stays. No “hindsight is 20/20” editing. So far, I’ve been pretty good about following the rule. I have corrected a few spelling mistakes and written bits of commentary on past entries But, overall I’ve been quite the self-enforcer. I bring this up because I’ve recently cross-applies the rule to this blog. Having re-read a variety of entries, I've become tempted to edit. For example, my recent post regarding my plea for a phone call. I can't help but ask myself, "Really, Jacki? Really? You really wanted to post on the world wide web that you were waiting by the phone for a boy to call?” I think the answer to that question is pretty obvious. Nonetheless, I wrote it. I posted it. So, now it might as well be written in stone. It stays. As does everything else. I will not be editing.

Moving on... Biden rocks. More on that later.

Phone call....

2008-08-23T09:18:00.001-07:00

Uber cute man asked for my number. Tall. Dark curly hair. Dimples. Sarcasm. Self deprecation. Gentleman. Text messaged me within hours of meeting.

I actually want him to call me. Seriously. This NEVER happens. I really want him to cal l me. Please call. Don't be stupid. Just call me.

Whatever. I'm lame. I know.

TV Star...

2008-08-22T18:53:00.000-07:00

I'm on a national Korean TV show. It is ridiculous with loud colors and sound effects. It is the very definition of "cheesy." But, it was also uber fun and just another awesome Korean story!

For your viewing pleasure...

http://www.arirang.co.kr/Tv2/Tv_Video_On.asp?
PROG_CODE=TVCR0397&code=Po5&sys_lang=Eng

(It is suppose to be just be one long website link, but it is too long so you have to cut and paste both sections of the website address. Sorry)

Click on the credit cards debate.
Log in: jevans2002
Password: 1234

A few things you should laugh at or ask yourself...

1. Slogans. What game show would be complete without forcing the teams to come up with awkward names and even more unnatural slogans?

2. Wow, what an enthusiastic audience! There seems to be only 20 people in the entire audience, but they cheer so loudly! Ah, the joy of sound effects.

3. What an interesting scoring method. I'd love to know how they come up with the point system! Funny you should ask that... Me too! (The judges pick the winner and then the show just makes up fake points in order to have something to show on the screen. Mystery solved.)

4. Finally, I thought Jacki was a good debater. What happened? Well, the answer to this one is a bit more tragic. She seems to have developed an unhealthy addiction for the ridiculous verbal filler "we would argue." She is seeking professional help and has taken the first step toward recovery by admitting that she does, indeed, have a problem.

In short, when you laugh at me, try and pretend you are laughing with me.

Enjoy.

Not Dead...

2008-08-22T02:58:00.000-07:00

My mother wrote me an email checking to make sure I am still alive. My best friend and I have exchanged one email in the last month. And as my good friend Lindsey (so eloquently) put it, "Your blog blows."

So, I'm back. And it is about time.

I've got a month or so worth of good stuff to post so I'll just start typing and see where it goes.

First, I have a really bright third grader in one of my classes. Her name is Jina and she smiles, volunteers to answer questions and really makes an effort. She's great. In class a couple days ago someone asked me if I had a boyfriend. This is a pretty common question, since gender stereotypes are still prevalent in Korean culture. As a result, most of my students are very interested in whether I have a boyfriend, want a boyfriend or am married. My typical answer to this question is that I do not just have one boyfriend, I have ten boyfriends! This response usually gets a laugh and then I can get back to a more appropriate subject matter. But, on this particular day while everyone was laughing at my oh-so-clever response, Jina announced (quite proudly) that she doesn't need a boyfriend because she is a strong girl.

YES! YES! YES! Yes, Jina! Way to defy the thousands of media messages directed at pre-teens! I was so proud of her. And yet despite my glee, I decided that a celebratory dance and wild declaration of, "Take that you, vicious media scum!" might be a bit much. So, I just gave her a subtle high-five and agreed that she is, indeed, a strong girl.

Yes!

Speaking of boyfriends, my old semi-kinda-whatever-boyfriend from Austria sent me a nice email the other day. He seems to be enjoying himself and is glad to be back home. I told him the story of how I actually went drinking with an Austrian girl while in Hong Kong and was able to make an authentic Austrian toast with her. She was (obviously) quite impressed.

Onto other news, this Wed I went out drinking and dancing with a bunch of debaters that are in Korea for a debate workshop. It was crazy fun. Not only are debaters great drinkers! They are shamelessly awesome. I danced with a couple of debaters from Ghana and Kenya. There were cool American and Korean debaters that I know from other groups. I had a nice chat with a Iraqi Kurd who was happy to defend America's involvement in the Middle East. And all of that, doesn't even include the Chinese and Pakistani debaters who showed me a thing or two about poker and taught me a swing dance move. Wow! What a night!

Another great part of that night was having a drink with Matt Stanard. Stanard is one of the most respected debate coaches in the US and the directer of one of the most respected debate programs. I have always been in awe of his debaters.

However, before I continue with my Stanard story, let me make a quick side note. I have never been an excellent debater. I was a good debater. I loved it more than anything else I've ever done. And if you could divide debaters into "excellent" "good" "fair" and "poor." I made it to the top of the "good" category. I was better than a lot of other good debaters and every now and then I would wiggle my way into the lower-rankings of the "excellent" category, but I have to admit that I just couldn't hold my own with that crowd.

Back to the story... Stanard coached and continues to produce debaters in the "Excellent" to "Off-The-Charts" categories. I just assumed he had no idea who I was or where I came from. I couldn't imagine ever making his radar. But, when I was getting introduced to him, he already knew who I was! He even remembered what school I had debated for. And we just chatted. Nothing special. Nothing life altering. I bought him a beer. Nonetheless, it was surreal. I wish I could better explain why that interaction was so note-worthy. But, maybe it's just simply because the moment made me feel note-worthy. Like my rare moments of excellence might have been worth remembering.

Okay... I could go on because I have a lot more. I am on a national Korean debate TV show. (I'll post the link.) I am starting my grad school apps. Obama is going to announce his VP any second. The way Koreans have responded to the Olympics is awesome. I went on a date with an underground street fighter/ former Canadian coke dealer.

But, that will all have to wait. I'm out of time.

Stay tuned... More to come.

HK...

2008-08-03T00:31:00.000-07:00

I'm still in HK. Really good times.

We started the trip by seeing the sites. Museums, tourists attractions and plenty of other interesting locals. But, after a few days Mike and I decided to start relaxing. We switched hostels and took the "tourist" element down a couple notches.

There are lots of observations I'd love to include about the people, city and traveling in general, but I'm hot and tired and ready for a nap. (What a crazy gal I am!)

I'll write more later, but for now I have to say we've been fortunate to have met some cool people. The guys running our hostel are awesome. They're from Africa and incredibly generous. At a pub a couple night ago we ran into a cool British guy who teaches English in Beijing and getting his VISA for the Olymipcs. We met a nice Austrian girl who is traveling around the world.

All is well.

Hong Kong (without any of the good stuff)...

2008-07-30T04:27:00.000-07:00

I'm in Hong Kong. It is hot and humid and wonderful! All at the same time. I want to write more and detail my experience, but I'm off to do fun things and don't have a whole lot of time.

So, just believe me when I say... Great city. Great times.

Oh... and I have about 5 posts that are in the "draft" stages that I've never actually finished. So, I'm hoping to drop some knowledge in the next few days when I finish and post the posts. But, just to give you a taste of the good stuff to come... I was on a Korean game show! No, really.

Digression...

2008-07-24T00:35:00.001-07:00

"Digression is the soul of wit."

My father often asks for the “reader's digest version” of my stories. My long-winded nature and tendency to digress and pursue tangents is well-known in my family. My father's request for a "reader's digest version" is an (often futile) attempt to keep me on track.

But, I was reading Bradbury’s afterward to Fahrenheit 451 and he beautifully defended digressions. Claiming that digressions are not only the soul of wit, but they are the sunshine, the life and the soul of reading. I couldn't agree more.

I remember reading Salinger's The Catcher In The Rye and being entirely bored by the “crumbly” Holden Caulfield as he wandered the streets on New York complaining about every person he met. But, I reached Chapter 22 and my heart stopped, my lungs were void of air and I cried. It was as though I was meeting Holden Caulfield for the first time and the pain of the character was overwhelming. I realized the digressions of the book, the conversation with the nuns, the phone calls to old girlfriends, the writing in the bathroom stalls, were more than just “excessive” descriptions of a young boy’s adventure. They were manifestations of emptiness, confusion, and a longing to return to unaltered happiness and innocence. And most importantly, in Holden's mind, they were what waited for any child who Holden couldn't save from the cliff's edge.

The digressions of the book were the soul and sunshine of the novel.

Wow. I really do love that book.

Car Wash...

2008-07-17T22:13:00.000-07:00

You've heard the story of the country folk who decide to go to town. They get up early, bathe and brush their hair. They put on their Sunday best and try to look their most presentable. They say "please" and "thank you" and do their best to be respectful.

Today I went to the bank to make an international transfer. I got up early, showered and curled my hair. I ironed my prettiest dress and put on make-up. I didn't consciously plan all this out, but it felt like I should look presentable and respectable today. However, now that I think about it, I know why. I didn't want to give anyone a reason to judge me. I could just as easily wear jeans and my Reefs, but if I wear a dress and curl my hair, maybe I'll be less likely to be labeled, "just another stupid foreigner." Of course, I realize how silly this is, but I am the ONLY white person in the entire building. I have never transferred money internationally and even if I had, I am entirely helpless unless someone can speak my language. It's like I'm a country bumbkin in a big city!

While at the bank I experienced one of my least favorite elements of being a helpless foreigner. I call it, "The Crowd." I started speaking to one clerk, then another came over to assist. These two clerks were followed by another. By the end I had between three and five clerks helping me and speaking Korean around me. There are a few reasons I dislike this. First, I feel guilty to trouble all these people. FIVE people had to stop what they were doing to help the ONE person who came to their country and doesn't speak the language! Every other person in the bank requires one person to help them. I require FIVE! It feels selfish and arrogant. Second, I don't know what any of these people are saying. They are speaking around me and I don't know how to respond. Sometimes they will throw in a few English words and look at me, but I miss the English words because I am so lost in the Korean. I don't know how to be polite. Do I pay attention to the speaker despite having no idea what he is saying? Do I look at the listener and try to discern if he understands the instructions and will be able to help? Or, do I sit quietly, examine the ground and try and wait until they need me for something? I just don't know and usually do a combination of all three; my gaze drifting from speaker to listener to the chipped nail polish on my toes. The last reason why I dislike this is that I have to rely on body language. The vocal tone of the Korean language is so different from English that there is no way for my discern emotion in the volume and tone of the words. So, instead I rely on body language to gauge the attitude of the people around me. One woman looked so helpful. She sat forward and smiled and pointed at things I needed. Another man slouched in his chair, would speak Korean/English at me and then look away and slightly roll his eyes if I didn't understand him the first time. The original clerk didn't smile, worked diligently and just pointing at places I needed to sign or fill in account numbers. And the mixture of attitudes puzzled me. Should I be apologetic? Friendly? Quiet and professional? Most often when I am unable to discern the proper response to a situation, I simply follow the lead of the other people in the situation. But, in these "crowd" moments... WHO DO I FOLLOW?

In the end, I was successful at the bank. I transferred the money and all ended well. There was one more funny moment. At the bank, instead of being able to electronically transfer the money, I had to actually go over to the ATM and withdraw the cash and give it to the clerk. So, I had to withdraw 5 million won, which is about $5000. However, the largest bill they have is a 10 thousand won bill, which is about $10. So, I had to walk across the bank lobby with 500 bills. There was a little part of me that wanted to throw it in the air like confetti, start ghetto dancing and singing Jim Jones... "We fly high. No lie. You know this. BALLIN'. Foreign Rides. Outside. Just like showbiz." But that was one of the many urges I chose to ignore. Nonetheless, 500 bills in your hand, even 500 $1 bills still feels pretty good.

For your viewing pleasure, I've decided to share the video. Jim Jones "We Fly High."

Onto other subjects...

Wow... I am weak sauce. All flavors of weak sauce. I was at tap class today and am learning a new move. I hop from foot to foot, but have to do a double tap (called a "slap") when I hop. This doesn't sound hard, but I have to keep my knees bent and together, my feet have to be controlled by my ankles (and not my knees) and unless I can get my toe to point upward (which I still can't!) I'm not able to get the double tap. I end up kicking the floor instead of slapping it. Not to mention, my heels aren't allowed to touch the ground, so it is all on my toes. There are so many little parts to this simple move... toe up, back straight, ankles together, no heels, stay balances, keep the rhythm, hands on hips. And this is the only move I did for two hours. My calves and butt burned! And all I could think was "PULL IT TOGETHER, JACKI!" So, I just kept hopping and slapping, hopping and slapping.

Last week I learned another move I like a lot more! It is a flap-ball-change, but it includes a turn. So I do a 360 flap-ball-change while moving forward. It is a really fun move because my feet get to twist and stomp in fancy looking patterns. That move was so fun to learn that I didn't even realize two hours had passed. Of course, fun moves that don't hurt are rare. However, on days like today when the new steps burn and I think about how I'd rather be taking a nap on my Sat afternoon instead of hopping from left foot to right, I hear Christina Aguillera's song "Carwash." That song will be the song for my tap routine! And the faster I learn all these smaller steps, the quicker I'll get to put them together into a routine! Now, that will be FUN FUN FUN!

And for further viewing pleasure... Christina Aguillera "Carwash."

Ipods...

2008-07-05T23:31:00.000-07:00

My ipod has become an intregal part of my daily life. I don't go anywhere without it. I listen to it constantly. I'm always downloading entire new albums and putting my ipod on shuffle, never really knowing what I'm going to hear next. Of course, I've got all my classic favorites... The entire discography of Jackson Browne, Billy Joel, New Found Glory, Panic at the Disco and Rolling Stone's collection of the 500 greatest songs of all time which includes everything from The Clash, Lynard Skynyrd, The Police, and Prince, to The Shangri-Las, The Sex Pistols and Simon and Garfunkle. It is quite an eclectic mix.

But, last night I took my ipod to a new level!

It was the last night out with the Austrian and he wanted to go to B1... I hate B1! It's a kinda lame bar that has almost no room to dance and bad techno music. But, the European guys wanted to go so I tagged along! After a couple drinks and a sincere attempt at enjoying myself, I started getting annoyed. Not just tired, but annoyed! The whole scene was lame and contrived. I was in uncomfortable shoes. It was hot and the music felt like I was pounding my head into the wall... over and over and over. And then, I had a brilliant idea! I pulled out my ipod, turned up the volume and started rocking to my own tunes! It was awesome! It was like my own private dance party... I had the lights, the drinks, and with enough elbowing and pushing I was able to make my own mini dance floor. AND... I could sing along to my own music! Amazingly, my feet suddenly stopped hurting, the heat seemed inconsequential and my mood improved dramatically! Not to mention, the ipod became a catalyst for attracting new dancing partners! People would do a double take. It would take them a second to realize... wait, why is she listening to an ipod when there is already music playing? So, then I'd share my ipod with them and we'd dance to my music for awhile.

Like I said, taking my ipod to a new level!

In other news...

This was the last weekend with the Austrian. He was here for about two months and we dated pretty consistently for the two months. It was a nice time. And the best part was the laid back, casual nature of the entire thing. It was easy, probably because there was always a set expiration date. No worries about the future. No false expectations. No concern for "where is this going?" Just good company, lots of good food and wine and some pretty interesting conversations. And so today with a kiss goodbye, we parted ways. Another friend from another part of the world. Here are a couple pictures from this past weekend.

However, there are parts of my life that aren't changing... I still LOVE my tap class. Wow! It is great. I am getting a little better every time I practice, I can see it. It doesn't seem like tap would be that hard, but most people don't attempt to move their feet in such a specific and controlled manner. Tap is all about moving your feet using your ankles, not your knees. So, tap dancers have to move the toe, heel and ball of their foot in quick and calculated succession in order to make distinct sounds and movements. It is a really fun feeling when you can hear the beat of the music and get your feet to make just the right sound. I've started a new movement where I tap backwards and I'm having some trouble... but I'll get it! Oh, I'll get it!

Speaking of dance, I think I am going to sign up for another dance class. There is a dance studio in Itaewon that caters to foreigners and it has all sorts of Latin classes, and swing lessons. The swing lessons are on Saturdays, so I could go to my tap class from 1-2:30 and then to the swing class from 3:30-5:00. Awesome!

And finally... the weather. Oh, dear god! It is hot and humid. It is so hot that if I just stand outside I sweat through my clothes. In fact, it is about 10:00pm here and it is 80 degrees with 80% humidity. There are glass doors on the front of my school and the air conditioned room and the hot exterior are causing the windows to fog up! During my dance class, the room gets so hot that sweat drips off my face and body as I dance. The glass mirrors get fog all around the top and we drink gallons of water! In short... It is hot!

America...

2008-07-03T20:33:00.001-07:00

I really love my country.

Cars...

2008-07-01T04:26:00.001-07:00

Did you know...?

Did you know that in Korea all the cars have small phone number stickers in the front windshield?

Since people park so tightly and in such strange locations, the phone number is on the car so you can call and ask the person to move their car if it is blocking you in or is parked in an inappropriate location.

Important Days...

2008-06-30T10:53:00.000-07:00

I think I missed the big day... My six month anniversary! Can you believe it? Six months in Seoul! It feels funny because the amount of time I have left on my contract is shorter than the amount of time I've been here. My goodness...

However, there are a few other big days I want to highlight...

First, the Fourth of July is coming and this will be my first Independence Day outside of the country. I love the Fourth of July, it is easily one of my favorite holidays. So, I will definitely be wearing red, white and blue this Friday! I'll find my own way to celebrate!

Second, and more important than the others... My dad's birthday! I really miss my dad. When I went home a few weeks ago, we'd find odd times to just sit and talk. I'd wake up early because I was still on Korean time and he'd be up stretching. We'd end up sitting in the office until he had to go to work. Another time, I went to lunch at the clubhouse and was sitting out on the secluded porch, but he found me and we'd talk for an hour or two. While my mom is without a doubt, one of my best friends, I really am beginning to think that I am secretly a daddy's girl.

Maybe not so secretly... It's just that I think most everything about my dad is really cool. I like his stories, his music, his jokes, his advice, his artwork, his movies, (most of) his books... And as I get older I find myself adopting more and more of his favorite as my favorites. I'm sure some shrink could come up with a complex theory about my subconscious and some deep need to garner parental favor, but I think it is far more simple than that. My did is just really great and the more I grow up, the more I realize he's been that way all along!

And let me add one more story... If only because I don't ever want to forget it. When I arrived home a few weeks ago I met my mom at the house. Dad was at work, but we planned on meeting him for lunch at the clubhouse. After chatting with mom, we were running ahead of schedule and drove over to meet him at his office. It was a new office I'd never seen, so I climbed the stairs not sure where I was going. But, I heard my dad's voice and peaked around the corner. I didn't want to interrupt his conversation with one of his staff, I just wanted to wave and let him know I was there when he was ready to go. But, he saw me and stopped his conversation mid-sentence. His whole face looked happy. His face went from night to day. He smiled, he bounced. And I was so so so happy to see my dad. It was my favorite part of my entire trip home.

I don't think my pops reads this blog, but just in case... Happy Birthday Dad! You're the best!

I Don't Think I Can Dance...

2008-06-26T08:37:00.000-07:00

I had my first tap lesson last night! It was fantastic! I've taken tap before, but never like this. In the past, the instructor is always trying to teach you something right away so you can feel a bogus sense of accomplishment. But, this instructor has no interest in that. She is about technique. I spent almost two hours taping my toe; knees bent, back straight, chin up, hands on hips and trying not to move a single muscle above my ankle. I kept my heel one inch off the ground and tried to pull my toe as far upwards as possible so that I could see the tap on the bottom of my shoe in the mirror. This sounds far easier than it is... My shins burned as I tried with all my might to get my toe up and then do a quick tap followed by a hard flap. (Taps and flaps are not the same!) And after four eight counts on one foot, I'd switch. In most other classes they'd have you doing shuffles and a simple shuffle-heel-toes by the end of class so you could feel like you are "really learning to tap." Instead, I learned to tap my toe... Over and over and over again. And I still looked like a lopsided, drunken flamingoish-bird while doing it. BUT... BUT... BUT... It was awesome! More fun than I knew what to do with! I can't wait till my next lesson on Saturday!

On a quick side note... If I take one thing away from my experience in Korea, it will be the understanding of what it feels like to be a minority. I was the only non-Korean in the class. Wow. I keep thinking I'll get used to it, but when I walk into a new room and a dozen pair of eyes turn to look... I realize that the "deer in the headlights" feeling may not be something you ever get used to.

But, the second lesson I'll take is that people are capable of incredible warmth and kindness... no matter what language they speak. At the end of the class I had to stand in front of everyone and show what I learned. (Seriously, I stood in front of the class and tapped my toe! That's it. Toe up. Toe down. FOR EIGHT COUNTS!). But, the really hard part was introducing myself. Since I was new I had to say my name, and I also added that I was from California.Then I didn't know what else to say. I was puzzled and nervous and frozen... But, some random Korean guy gave a friendly cheer/holler and started enthusiastically clapping for me. I felt like I'd been rescued by a stranger. And as the class ended and all the groups and friends left together I walked out alone and a bit intimidated from the whole experience, but as I turned up the street someone yelled, "Goodbye. Goodbye." I turned to see some of the tappers were going in the other direction, but called after me to say goodbye.

It's great to be different. But sometimes it's nice to feel the same.

Before I wrap this up, I have to share a deep secret... My guilty pleasure television show is "So You Think You Can Dance." I can't help it! I understand the ridiculousness of summer reality television. I know there are about a thousand other activities that could better entertain and stimulate me, but I am hooked! And, normally I'd never let anyone in on this little secret... But, I just about flipped out with last night's episode.

There was one dance performance where the pair captured a range of emotion that captured me and made me hold my breath. It was beautiful and bittersweet. A man attached to his work. A woman attached to the man. Her pain and rage at her own dependence and inability to walk away. His cold composure as he prioritizes his work and still is able to take her heart right out of her chest. Dance is artwork.

Watch the ending, where he walks away. Her complete rage. It's like she is enclosed and trying to break her way out of an emotional prison. Her anger seems all consuming, but it isn't anger at him, it's anger at her own vulnerability and attachment to a man she knew would disappoint her.

Oh... and I like the pop song. Sue me.

See if you see what I see... (The dance starts at about 2:45.)

Adorable Overload...

2008-06-25T08:59:00.000-07:00

Speaking of dance...

After six months of searching, I found tap dance lessons! They are cheap. They are close and I started tonight. I'm a bit tired, so I'll write more about the lesson later.

But, the real reason I'm posting is that I just HAD to share this picture.

It's Chris and Mike. Chris, the boy who gave me a spontaneous hug and told me "No Goodbye," is in the green shirt. The other boy is Mike, the heart breaker who keeps smelling my hair, kissing me on the elbow and whispering sweet nothings in my ear, "I like Jacki Teacher."

That sure is one hell-of-a-lot of adorable!

Dance...

2008-06-23T09:39:00.001-07:00

I was just thinking about what I'll do when I spend a month or two in Buenos Aires. I just figured it out... Dance lessons. Dancing and dancing and dancing. Tango lessons. Tap lessons. Ballroom lessons. Yes! Yes! Yes!

Feminism...

2008-06-22T23:34:00.000-07:00

Living in Korea I have been insulated from most of the political commentary surrounding the primary season. I had to search for it, mostly from newspapers and online sources. And the distance resulted in my missing most of the rampant sexism surrounding Hillary Clinton's candidacy. But, now that Hillary Clinton has left the race, the issue of sexism is being included in the post-game analysis. And while I supported Obama, the discussion surrounding Hillary Clinton has left me feeling simultaneously saddened and livid.

I'm deeply saddened by the news media. I expected sexism when Hillary became a legitimate presidential candidate. But, even with these expectations, I was still too naive and optimistic. I expected the sexism to be from older generations, and I expected it to be subtle. I expected newscasters to only hint at stereotypes, out of fear of becoming too politically incorrect. But, I couldn't have been more wrong. Comparisons of Clinton to a nagging spouse, to an ex-wife outside of probate court, to Lorena Bobbitt, to a sexless monster, to Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" and to dozens of other awful female caricatures, highlighted the lack of fear the news media felt. The media caters to it's audience. If the viewing audience was offended by sexist remarks and bigotry, then the news media would have steered clear. In short, they knew their audience and they weren't worried. That saddens me.

It also infuriates me because I am a woman. And the people with podiums and illusions of credibility who disseminate "truth" and "fact" have created impossible expectations and a double standard. They have decried women for being too emotional and moody, but mocked strong and powerful female decision makers. They have claimed a fear of a female candidate focusing on "women's issues" while refusing to acknowledge that any issue that affects half a county's population should be the concern of the entire population. And even worse, they have failed to ever apply the same standard to male counterparts; never questioning the legitimacy of a male's candidacy based upon his "men's issue" agenda. These media faces and voices have a national podium from which their words seep into homes, classrooms and minds. Their total failure to recognize the impact of their rhetoric is appalling and vile. Hundreds (literally hundreds) of studies have shown that words drastically influence the way we identify, humanize and treat one another. There is no doubt that just a few select words used to label another as different or inferior, results in others altering their treatment according to the description. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. And so I am infuriated when I hear newscasters using hateful and derogatory words that cast a vision of females as "others." Furthering that rhetoric, further perpetuates the prophecy.

Feminism is about respect.
It isn't about being the same.
It's about being equal.
Four quarters and a dollar.

Job Security...

2008-06-19T22:59:00.001-07:00

Well, good times at the hagwon!

I’ve mentioned that there has been a bit of disruption at the school.
It’s getting worse.

All of my classes have fewer students. Three months ago I taught 12 classes. I had about 6-9 students in each class. I now teach 9 classes. Each of my classes has about 4-6 students. In one of my classes I have one student. In another I have only three. This decrease in students didn’t seem like a big deal. The hagwon has had waves of students as they come and go. But, recently the students are going and I don’t see them coming back. But, even worse, the staff are leaving also. Our principal was fired about three months ago. The two top Korean teachers quit. We had two or three directors come and work for the hagwon, only to quit within a few weeks or days. One of the foreign teacher’s contract expired so he went back to his home country. And about a week ago the director of the school, the top administrator, stopped coming to work. No one knew where she went, but today it was official… She quit. Things aren’t looking so good here at the hagwon. A new director arrived today, but there is no guarantee that he will stay. In fact, he has never run a hagwon before so I am a bit skeptical. In short, the school has seen brighter days.

But, I should note… I am not worried. If the hagwon shut down tomorrow, I would be more than fine. Job security is not an issue when you are an English teacher in Korea.

On a brighter note, some of my students are adorable. One of them, Mike, is five years old and today he held my hand and pulled me close to the ground so that he could talk to me. He had to get right next to my ear so that I could hear him, he said just barely loud enough for me to hear, "I like Jacki Teacher." Yep... That's me! Jacki Teacher Extraordinaire!

Back. Baby. Back...

2008-06-18T22:11:00.000-07:00

There is no explanation for why I haven't written. The world was turning, but I just didn't get around to writing about any of it.

But, there is plenty going on...

This morning I was teaching at the elementary school. When I first started working there I only taught a few classes and there were two other foreign teachers. Last week both of those teacher's contracts expired and they went back to their home countries. The director of the school asked me to join their staff as a full time employee and teach a few more classes. No problem. Now, I teach at two different hagwons. I teach grade school and middle school in the afternoon and three classes of 5, 6 and 7 year olds in the morning. But, despite spending most of my time with the older kids in the afternoon, most of my fun stories come from the younger kids.

The class of six-year-olds is the my most trying class. There are 12 students, 10 boys and 2 girls. And, you haven't seen chaos until you have tried to lead 12 six-year-olds, who don't speak English in a craft using crayons, scissors and glue sticks! At all times at least half of the students need my immediate and undivided attention. And while six students are vying for my attention and approval, the other six are usually taking advantage of the moment and looking for ways to cause destruction and bodily harm to one another. It is quite a balancing act.

But, the best part of the class is the distinct personalities that emerge amidst the bedlam. For example, the lovesick Tiara. Tiara at the ripe, old age of six is infatuated with one of the former teachers, James. She draws hearts and pictures for him and I realized today that she doesn't really understand that James isn't coming back. It was a bit sad. She asked, "James Teacher?" which in her limited English meant, "Where is James Teacher?" I explained that James was gone. The language barrier prevented a fuller explanation and I don't think it sank in. I could sense her disappointment, but as she resumed her coloring I suspected it wouldn't be long before Tiara finds a new man in her life! And as for me, I think I am going to be a bit of a heart breaker as well. One of my six year olds has been smelling me. He especially likes to smell my hair and today he finally made his move... He kissed my arm. That's right, a stolen kiss on the elbow... Talk about romance!

But, what is even better than a kiss? I'll tell you what's better... a hug. Before I leave class everyday, I always practice greetings with the students. "Hello." "How are you?" "I am fine. Thank you." And I always end the lesson with "Goodbye." As the end of class neared, I sat in my mini chair (Oh yeah, I sit in one of the tiny, three foot tall, wooden chairs!) and started the usual greetings. Before I got to the end one of the boys shouted, "No goodbye!" I smiled and said, "Yes goodbye!" Looking distraught, he shouted "No goodbye!" He got up from his chair, walked over and put his arms around my neck to give me a long hug. And that, ladies and gentlemen was the best part of my day. At 10:45am, I could have just packed up and gone home, because it doesn't going to get any better than that.

Of course, I also have the more unique personalities. One of the boys, loves to clean. Whenever we do crafts he rushes to finish his project so that he can get the little plastic broom and dustpan and start cleaning up all the paper scraps. He lives to clean! Another one of the boys, Victor, is the class clown. He loves to only finish coloring half of the page and then hand it to me with a clever look in his eye. I always act playfully astonished and say "No color? No. No. No." And hand it back to him and he cracks up. He just giggles and giggles.

I could go on and I will eventually tell you more stories... After all, I spend my mornings sitting on the floor, surrounded by miniature people, coloring, singing the Itsy-Bitsy-Spider song and making funny faces. There is definitely a lot of blog material there!

But, onto other news. Mad Cow Disease. Holy smokes! These people are angry! Angry! Angry! For those of you who don't watch, read or listen to the news, or for those of you who just live in a cave (but somehow have internet access to read this blog), the new president of South Korea has just re-negotiated to allow the United States to import beef. South Korea has refused to allow US beef since 2003 due to a fear of Mad Cow Disease. After US beef got a clean bill of health from the WTO last September, the new South Korean president decided to lift the importation ban. This has resulted in hundreds of thousands of people protesting, resignations from most all members of the president's staff, approval ratings even worse than Bush's and pressure for him to leave office. Did I mention that these people are angry? Of course, much of the anger is based on sensationalism and faulty information. Imported beef has turned into a hot-button issue, surrounded by half-truths and rumormongering. But, the new President isn't making things easier for himself. He has failed to provide accurate information to the public and has accepted weaker safety restrictions than both Taiwan and Japan have demanded for imported US beef. In my opinion, the Mad Cow Disease issue shouldn't be this heated. But, the relationship between the United States and South Korea is in the midst of many changes and the anger over Mad Cow Disease may be an outlet to vent some of the rising steam. Here is a short article that summarizes a few other issues South Koreans have with the US. http://www.toledoblade.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080614/OPINION02/806140316

On a loosely related note, it is important to keep in mind the unique relationship between North and South Korea and the United States. There are 35,000 US troops still stationed in Korea, just a few miles from the DMZ. President Bush calls North Korea, a rogue state and a member of the Axis of Evil. But, the US considers South Korea a valuable trading partner. In 2007, America provided 11.7 percent of South Korea's imports and bought 14.5 percent of its exports. Despite the US's condemnation of North Korea, most South Koreans don't see North Korea as an evil twin. Instead, they see it as a long lost brother and seek reunification. They see North Korea as part of Korea and blame the United States and other outside actors for dividing their country. A relationship like that is bound to cause conflict. So, I think the US beef importation issue is further fueled by deep seeding, historic US resentment.

Okay. Okay. I'll wrap this up. This blog is getting long and a probably a bit too heavy.

But, before I go, a quick shout-out to two of my loyal readers. These guys actually read this blog. No kidding. And last weekend they made big news... They got married! I couldn't be there, but from the pictures and video (already posted on Facebook!) it was beautiful and fitting for this good-humored pair. Congratulations Brian and Lindsey. You are both genuinely wonderful people. I am a better person for knowing you and thrilled for you both!

9:59...

2008-06-03T00:58:00.000-07:00

It turns out that I am definitly a hippo... but not in the way I thought. In fact, I'm not even a "Drinking Hippo" I am a "Thirsty Hippo" as in the Korean Hippo Dehumidifiers. It turns out that there is a really popular advertisement for "Thirsty Hippo" products, specifically dehumifiers that suck the water out of the air. My kids told me all about it today! Ha!

However, it reminds me of all the things I teased my teachers about. All it would take is one misstep and we would crucify the teacher.

Teacher didn't shave this morning? Homeless.
Teacher has messy hair? Crazy.
Teacher stuttered while reading? Retarded.
Teacher smiled too much? High.

Kids are ruthless. It's also funny how much I don't care now that I'm a teacher. I care when they love me. But, don't care when they hate me. What a nice little world I've created!

Nonetheless, I applauded my students for their clever teasing with a few jokes about teachers. And after we all had a bit of laugh at the expense of teachers, I told them that I didn't care if they made jokes, but those jokes can't happen during class, in Korean or disrupt my lessons. They seemed to accept my scolding, and I was reminded that they're kids just being kids.

Onto other news, I've been listening to an old mix CD my friend, Kyle, made for me when I moved to Nebraska. He made one CD titled, "Moving to Nebraska" and a few months later he sent me the sequel, "Surviving the Midwest." I've been listening to "Surviving the Midwest" and now that I am surviving Korea, a lot of the songs re-apply. There is something unique about being in a big, annonymous, foreign city listening to music that someone special picked especially for you. It's a moment of contrast, a personal experience midst an extremely impersonal experience. I like it a lot.

I'm in a very kind mood today. I'm usually in a good mood, and a relativly social mood, but today I am feeling uniquely kind. I just want to help my kids become smarter. I want to have more patience with the trouble makers. I want to share my umbrella with a stranger. This angelic disposition may not last long (I have to wake up very early tomorrow on my day off), but I'll make the most of it while it lasts.

So, I'm still power walking. Going on week three. Look at me go!

This month will mark six months in Korea. My time here is half over. Wow. Time flies. I don't expect this to be the last of my time in Korea, most of you know of my intention to return, but I am soon going to be on the downhill side of my time with this school. It's not that I don't like the school, it's just that I really like change!

Well, it is 9:59pm. I'm out of here!

Hungry Hungry Hippos...

2008-06-01T01:56:00.001-07:00

Well, I learned my nickname among some of my students. "The Drinking Hippo." Yep... You heard it right! They are calling me a hippo. The drinking part comes from my constantly bringing water bottles to class, but the hippo part, there is no nice way to interpret that. They are calling me fat. I don't really see the justification, but I guess it only gives me more motivation to keep up the workouts.

The cute boy came back into town. We went out last night and had a great time. But, I think I'm starting to get bored. After all, one whole month with the same person... I really shouldn't get bored so easily. This is not good.

I've been learning new phrases from my Korean friends, "I like you." "I love you." "You're welcome." and "I miss you." The only problem is that once I learn a new phrase, the phrase keeps playing over and over in my mind. It's like a broken record and I want to say the phrase to everyone. So, yesterday I was running around saying "I love you. You're welcome" to just about everyone I met. I'm such a show off.

Hillary is a goner. I know this isn't news. But, we are going to have a Dem nominee before the week is through. Can you believe it? I was talking about it at dinner with some Europeans and I got so excited that I got goosebumps. They thought I was ridiculous, but I couldn't help myself.

I may never own a car again. I love not having one. No car payment. No car insurance. No gas. No parking. No maintenance. If I move back to the States or to Europe, I want to live in a big city and then I'll just car-share. It is about 1/3 the cost of owning a car and so easy! However, if I do ever buy a car... Mini Cooper all the way!

This summer is MY summer for movies. The movie line-up couldn't be better.

Indiana Jones.
The X-Files.
Sex and the City.
Penelope.
Batman.
Get Smart.

Finally, go listen to American Girl by the Goo Goo Dolls. The song is monopolizing my ipod.

Jumanji

2008-05-26T05:59:00.000-07:00

"After all, we all have our frames, our boundaries of perception, into which we only allow certain notions of truth that resonate with our levels of education, spiritual understanding, experience. And the true art lies in respecting the frames of others, plying those borders with words of polite wisdom, all while still able to enjoy the same wine."
-Mark Morford

I know my fanaticism with Mark Morford is a bit ridiculous. But, I haven't come across another columnist who captures my interest so consistently and profoundly.

In other news...

I am really getting into books on tape. I've never been a big fan, but lately I am quite enthusiastic about them. I've been searching all the torrent sites to find new downloads for my ipod. I didn't think it was possible, but I like them even better than music while power walking. It gives me something new to look forward to instead of the same old emo/hip hop hits that plague my workout playlist.

Speaking of power walking, I have a power walking partner! Lately I have been power walking to the local mall to get a healthy, low-cal, fruit smoothie for breakfast. After all, what could possibly be a better workout motivation than food? Oh, the irony! And my co-worker, Grace, asked if I want to power walk with her in the morning. So, now we meet every Mon, Wed and Fri and walk to Gangnam for our healthy smoothies. It is about a hour and 20 minutes round trip and on Fridays we add an extra hour by hiking a small hill/park near our house. And the best part is that Grace isn't a flake. We set walking dates and we stick to them! And since we missed yesterday because of rain, Grace called to see if I wanted to get up early today to make up for yesterday! So, at 6:45am I pulled myself out of bed and power walked! I can feel all the walking in my very tired legs, but it's the good kind of pain.

Speaking of rain, monsoon season is fast approaching. I have to admit that I would not have known the definition of the word "monsoon" if not for childhood classic movie, Jumanji (Every month at the quarter moon, there will be a monsoon in your lagoon). Yesterday I got my first taste of the season. I woke to pouring rain and dressed for the awful weather. Long sleeved shirt and pants. A sweatshirt. A hat. Thick socks. Tennis Shoes. I stepped outside and I was BOILING! It was sticky and hot and RAINING?!? How could this be? Rain = cold weather! But, I was very wrong. I put on a sundress, flip flops and grabbed an umbrella. My second outfit was much more appropriate and far more comfortable when the clouds cleared a few hours later and the sun beat down.

I have now officially witnessed the childhood cliche of children eating paste. Classic.

Today in class I faced a bit of an obstacle. I was teaching third graders and the debate topic was based on the book we have been reading, "The Worst Christmas Pageant Ever." The topic was "Christmas should be abolished." This seems like a relatively mundane topic, but Christmas involves things like Jesus and Santa. Both are a bit tricky with a bunch of third graders. I ended up accepting the premise that Santa does exist and I carefully avoided the Jesus topics. It wasn't my finest debate hour, accepting the existence of a mythical creature and avoiding the discussion of potentially another mythical creature. But, I can only do my best and remember that perfection isn't a reasonable goal.

As I write this one of my kids is getting distracted from his essay writing. He is eating his eraser. He actually has crumbs of eraser on his face. Maybe I should inquire if he'd be interested in any lead paint chips as an appetizer.

There comes a point when it is acceptable to eat American fast food in a foreign country. When you first arrive in a foreign country it seems like an abomination to eat at an American establishment after having traveled so far. After a few months you openly enjoy American food, but still consider it a sign of weakness and aren't proud of your laziness. However, there comes a point when the tables turn and American food becomes foreign. It is refuge from your typical meals. And at that point, eating American food no longer makes you feel guilty. (Well, at least not for reasons other than the calorie count.) I am finally a guilt-free American food eater.

I coughed today and felt a slight sting in my throat. Please please please do not let the yellow sand come back and rip apart my esophagus. Please. Please. Please.

Every now and then I see a grown-up who looks very similar to one of my students. That person always catches my attention. I want to examine their clothes and any other visible clues that might tell about their life. It's like I'm trying to figure out how my students will grow up. Of course, my reaction is completely illogical. But, the question of "Who will these students become?" is constantly in the back of my mind and my brain seems to be looking for an answer.

And finally, a quick story from before I left for Korea. I was in the doctor's office getting my blood pressure taken three days before I would leave. The nurse was hooking up the strap to my arm and we were chatting about my trip. I couldn't stop talking about my plans. She took my pressure as I continued to rave. The nurse's jaw dropped, my blood pressure was through the roof! She couldn't believe it! She told me to stop talking about Korea and she would take my pressure again. I sat quietly and the second time my blood pressure was normal. In other words, my heart pounded and blood literally rushed through my veins when I spoke about Korea... Even then I knew it was a good sign!

Burns Tower...

2008-05-25T00:16:00.000-07:00

I saw the new Indiana Jones movie last night. As you might know (but probably don't), University of the Pacific's Burns Tower makes an appearance in Raiders of the Lost Ark. And, much to my delight, it made THREE appearances in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Just keep an eye on the background when Indy and his gang are walking on the univestity campus. You'll notice a tall white tower... Go Tigers!

Holden Caulfield...

2008-05-24T01:03:00.000-07:00

Because anything less subtle would violate our relationship's unwritten rules.

"And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff- I mean if they are running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I'd do all day."

Seoul Survivor...

2008-05-22T02:56:00.000-07:00

I'm back. Even the perfect, golden, California sun couldn't keep me from Korea!

Before I get into the very eventful details of my trip, let me make a few shout outs.

First, to all the people who caught up on my blog in preparation for my arrival. I don't expect anyone to read my blog like it's the daily New York Times or even the bi-weekly (and totally awesome) Mark Morford column, but for those of you who check in every now and then... Thanks. It feels good to think that I'm not just writing this for my (mental) health.

Second, to my hagwon friends. None of them read this, but they really went out of their way to save my skin when I missed my flight. (More on that story later!) With all the horror stories about teachers who end up in awful schools with shady staff and teachers, I got really lucky. No joke.

Third, to my brother. Wow. This kid doesn't quit. He lent me his car. (A loud, stick shift Suburu that was unbelievably fun to drive!) He let me stay at his house three different times. He took his girlfriend and me out to dinner. And, he even picked me up from BART and waited with me at the DMV. What a guy, right? What a guy!

As for my trip... It was a blessing in so many ways. I got my Korean VISA so I can stay here through May 2009. I met my little brother's new girlfriend. I visited old debate and tennis friends. I had lunch with my dad out on the patio. I saw my mom's new store. I went shopping. I got lost in (beautiful) San Francisco. I got to drive a loud and fast sports car through the Calaveras County hills.

However, the trip wasn't all fun and games. I was suppose to return to Korea on Friday morning. That didn't happen... Here's why. Bright and early Friday morning I headed into San Francisco to pick up my Korean VISA and head to SFO. Having visited the Korean Consulate several times I was confident that I could find my way. I was wrong. Luckily, a few helpful gas station clerks pointed me in the right direction. After picking up my VISA I was ready to head to the airport. However, I clearly had not learned my lesson. Assuming I knew the way back to Highway 101 and knowing I had already lost time due to my last series of wrong-turns, I decided to forgo the Google directions I had printed the night before and hastily drove off. It only took a few minutes for me to realize my error, but it was too late. I was off the grid; off the Google map grid at least. But, once again kind gas station attendents saved the day and I soon was on my way to SFO. But, all the wrong turns had put me behind schedule. I returned the car, hauled my luggage to the international terminal, pulled out my ticket and rushed up to the counter where a nice lady informed me I was too late. Too late?!? How could that be? I was running a little behind, but my flight wasn't scheduled to take off for an hour! This nice lady informed me that actually my flight wouldn't take off for another 54 minutes to be exact. But, the check-in counter closed one hour prior to take-off. I was 6 minute late! I begged. I pleaded. I used every tool of persuasion I knew. No use. She had no sympathy and refused to let me on the plane. And so, I missed my flight! And then... My face turned a sick shade of green and I started to panic.

TANGENT: Before I continue, let me explain my fifteen second rule. As a general rule, I don't believe in panicing. It doesn't solve problems. It leads to irrational decision-making. And it makes all problems worse, or at least seem worse. But, there are some moments when I can feel panic well-up inside me. That sick combination of despair, rage, hopelessness and terror starts to flood my senses. And after having experienced a few of these moments, I've adopted a fifteen second rule. I give myself fifteen second to panic. Fifteen second to feel defeated, scared and incapable. But, after the fifteen second are spent... No more. No more complaining. No more terror. No more damsel-in-distress. And, it works. It makes me feel in control. It's a quick reminder that if I control the panic, then I can control the problem.

Now, back to the story. So, I employed my fifteen seconds rule. I didn't know how to get back to Korea. I hadn't transferred extra money from my Korean bank account to my US bank account to cover the extra costs. I didn't know how my school would react to the "convenient" mistake that gave me three extra days to spend with my family. I didn't have a rental car reserved. I didn't have a cell phone to contact my family. But, after the fifteen seconds I moved into problem-solver mode. I booked the next available (and reasonalbly priced) flight. I found a computer to transfer funds. I hunted for a rental car and a pay phone to call my family. I started the long trek back to Copperopolis. And when I ran into awful, Friday afternoon traffic I parked my car under a shady tree and took a much-needed nap until the traffic cleared.

The truth is, despite missing my flight, the extreme cost and the awful day that followed... I was so lucky to get to spend more time with family and friends. It was a blessing in disguise. It also gave me a chance to spend more time in Stockton and Pleasanton which only re-affirmed the correctness of my choice to move to Seoul. There was nothing left for me in California. I needed something to inspire and challenge me again, and I have truely found that in Seoul. When I finally arrived at the airport on Tuesday to board my new flight, I was so excited. I couldn't wait to get on the plane to Seoul. It felt like I was going home.

I finally arrived back at my Seoul apartment 25 hours after I had left California. It was a very very long trip and I was a walking zombie by the time I arrived home, but I guess that is best part of traveling. Your bed never feels softer than when you have been trying to sleep in airports and plane seats for the past day.

As for my school, I've already mentioned how fantastic my co-workers and supervisors were. But, the nicest part was some of the students. A few of them asked me how I enjoyed my trip. Others asked if we could finish the lesson early so that I could tell them about California. But, I have to mention one girl in particular, Sally.

Sally is five years old and is in a very small class of just two girls. She speaks very poor English and is often very independent and sometimes a bit moody. She has never been the affectionate type. I had missed three of Sally's classes while in the United States. When I showed up in class today Sally looked very sad. And as we began our lesson Sally, without saying a word, got up from her desk and walked over to stand beside my chair. I wasn't sure what she was doing, but I put my arm around her and she instantly climbed up on my lap and leaned her head against my shoulder. I almost didn't know how to react, so I just kept teaching and Sally followed along in my book. She was sad that I had left for so long. Later, during a break in the class when I tried to leave the room, Sally ran over and hugged me. She wouldn't let go. It was a bit unexpected, but it felt good to be missed!

White Girl Dancing...

2008-05-10T21:32:00.000-07:00

Very fun evening.

I went to a French restaurant with the cute boy. We sat outside on the terrace, drank wine and ate great seafood. Then we went to Seoul Pub. This is one of the many foreigner bars in Itaewon. We played darts, met some other friends and then went dancing.

At the dance club I was fixing my hair in the bathroom. About a dozen girls were trying to steal a piece of the mirror. All of a sudden a great song started playing and almost as if it were choreographed, all the girls started moving, mini-dancing as they applied their makeup or washed their hands. And someone yelled out, "It's a bathroom dance party!" We spent the rest of the song dancing in the bathroom, having our own dance party. It was hilarious!

At the dance club I was walking back from the bathroom dance party I ended up walking right into a couple guys from Africa who were awesome dancers. Really really good. I wasn't really paying attention, but one of them kinda confronted me... but not in a mean or aggressive way. In a dance-off sort of way. It was the strangest thing, so I just started dancing. Dancing like I've never danced before. And the guy danced right back at me. The other guys were just watching and I'm sure I wasn't very impressive, but it was so much fun. And after a few minutes, after I'd given every move I had (and would probably have had to resort to the funky-chicken dance move next), the guy gave me a great big smile, a high five and hug. And the other guys gave me high fives too. It was like the cool kids letting the nerdy kid play with them for a while. And once again I have to say... Only in Seoul. This stuff only happens in Seoul!

But, speaking of being a white girl. I was getting my nails done at my favorite beauty salon and the two Korean ladies working on my toes started laughing. One of them looked at my arm and started comparing her skin color to mine. I couldn't understand what she was saying, but then the other lady pulled up my pant leg and compared her skin color to my legs. I assumed they were laughing at me, which is not unusual. But, later on I was telling the story to one of my Korean friends and she corrected me. They weren't laughing at me, they were probably wishing their skin was as pale as mine. Koreans, especially women, want to be pale and they often wear clothes and hats to protect their skin from the sun. In fact, some women even buy whitener for their skin to help make their skin even more pale. So, I guess it is no wonder why I like it here. I'm practically translucent I'm so pale, but I've moved to the one place where it is attractive to look like you've never seen the light of day! I guess it is just a classic case of the grass being greener!

In other news... I suck at darts. I really really suck. I have played seven games against the cute guy, not including the times we have been a team against other people in the bar, and I have lost every time! And this isn't a case of me losing to soothe the guy's ego (As if I would ever lose on purpose... I'm a winner god damn it!). I just suck. I usually start out strong, maybe a couple triple 11's or a scattered 19 or 20, but then I become a queen of the triple 2 or the double 3. So in short... I end up buying a lot of rounds of drinks! After all, loser always buys. Maybe we need to change up our activities... Maybe a good ol' fashion debate! A couple Prime Minister constructive speeches, some crushing points of information, a good topicality arguments and a killer rebuttal! Now that sounds like a good way to keep a guy interested... After all, what guy in their right mind doesn't think debate is hot! Exactly!

Well, it's the final countdown. At this time tomorrow I will be on a plane headed to Japan. (And then on a plane header to the US.) I am so excited! Except, that I had a bunch of cool little presents to bring home and I realize I can't bring any of them with me. I'm only taking a small carry-on so bottles of soju and cool chopsticks will all get confiscated at airport security. Damn. I guess I'll just have to save the presents for my next trip home and the family will just have to settle for lots of pictures.

And finally... It's Mother's Day and my mom is definitely worth celebrating! My mom is just awesome. Really really awesome. She is smart, very funny, a great listener and gives advice that is golden. And the older I get, the cooler my mom gets! (Funny how that works!) And this year the whole family has even more reason to be proud of her. She just opened her own store. That's right, my mom has added a new feather to her cap... She's a businesswoman. Her store sells kitchen items and is called... wait for it... "Fancy Pans." Too cute! The grand opening was last week and I haven't seen the store, but I already love it!

She's Back...

2008-05-05T23:57:00.001-07:00

That's right... I'm back. No more complaining. No more whining. No more pouting. Things are lookin' good and lookin' up!

First, I am visiting home next week. Wow! At this time next week I'll be driving, or eating Mexican food with my little brother, or seeing my Mom's new store, or walking through the new town my Dad built, or calling Cynthia without a 16 hour time difference, or sitting on my parent's back porch drinking wine soaking in the California view while I read the entire last four months of the Economist and Time.

Of course, I am going to have to travel for about 16 hours to get from Seoul to Pleasanton and Copperopolis, but I don't care if it is 160 hours! And I am spending less than a week in California, but I am going to make the most of every minute. Not to mention... I gain 16 hours because of the time difference! I actually arrive in California two hours before I leave Korea.

Onto other news...

1. Have you heard? According to John Walters, director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy, "Marijuana is a more consequential substance of abuse than our culture has treated it in the last 20 years. This is not just youthful experimentation that they'll get over as we used to think in the past." He goes on to explain that marijuana leads to mental illness, depression, dependency and a wide range of other afflictions.

Now, I'm all for responsible drug policy. But, I thought the days of Reefer Madness were behind us. Seriously.

2. I am getting sick of the subway. This is really bad news because it isn't even summer yet. The subways have tons of stairs, are crowded and I have to transfer two or three times to get where I want to go. But, they are also getting warmer. During winter this was a welcome relief from the cold, but now I am sweating up a storm. But, that isn't the real problem. The real problem is that OTHER people are sweating up a storm. For the avid readers of my blog (all three of you) you know that deodorant isn't all that popular in Korea. No deodorant. Hot crowded subways. You do the math.

3. But, with the heat comes cute clothes. I am going to get ALL of my summer clothes that are packed away, just waiting for me back home! I CAN'T wait. I am going to wear skirts and t-shirts and shorts. But the most important piece of clothing... My Reef Flip Flops. Oh, how I miss those! Now, for those of you who are rolling your eyes right now at my exaggerated statements about clothes... I don't have an excuse. It's silly that I am so excited, but I just can't wait to stop wearing sweaters and jeans!

4. Here is my prediction... I just don't think Pam and Jim are going to get engaged. I'm a bit hesitant to say it because it seems so obvious, but that is why I have to say it. I hope it happens. And most every season finale has had an awesome Jim and Pam escalation (Season 2: The Kiss. Season 3: The Date. Season 4: ?) But, what I really want is an Angela and Dwight escalation. I am missing the Dwangela action.

And finally... It is good to have my optimism back. For a few days there I was feeling low. Being sick in a strange place will do that to you. But, my co-workers said something really funny the other day and I just couldn't stop laughing. It was like the laughter had been accumulating, waiting for me to relax and let it out. The ice cracked and once I started, I just couldn't stop.

I'm back.

Catch 22...

2008-05-01T23:12:00.000-07:00

I'm having one of those rare days where I just want to go back home, put on my pajamas and go back to bed. Just give up on this day and give it another try tomorrow. Here are few things that make me crabby...

I am starting to feel sick. I tried to go to the doctor today and got lost. Since I got lost, I had to make an appointment for another day. I didn't sleep in today so that I could make it to the appointment. But, I really needed the sleep because I'm getting sick. I ended up with no doctor and no sleep. What a total waste!

I am wearing new shoes. But, since they aren't worn-in yet, they are making my feet feel like bloddy stumps. Actually, having a pair of bloody stumps would probably be more comfortable than these damn shoes.

The cute guy asked me out again tonight after work. Good news, right? But, I feel sick. So, I don't want to go and be germy and gross. Not to mention, sick means no kissing. Give a girl a break!

I teach a class of really smelly kids today.

I was late to work. I really hate that.

But, I think I may just be in a rotten mood for the sake of being in a rotten mood. I'm happy there is a new episode of The Office, but I have a date so I'm angry I have to wait to see it later. But, since I'm sick I should just stay home and watch The Office. But, if I stay home I'm happy to watch my show, but angry because I'm not on my date. Like I said... pissy for the sake of being pissy.

I'm going to go take it out on my kids... An entire class of essay writing and vocabulary practice!

Paradise and Hell...

2008-04-27T08:56:00.000-07:00

Elite Korean Schools, Forging Ivy League Skills
April 27, 2008
New York Times
By SAM DILLON

SEOUL, South Korea — It is 10:30 p.m. and students at the elite Daewon prep school here are cramming in a study hall that ends a 15-hour school day. A window is propped open so the evening chill can keep them awake. One teenager studies standing upright at his desk to keep from dozing.

Kim Hyun-kyung, who has accumulated nearly perfect scores on her SATs, is multitasking to prepare for physics, chemistry and history exams.

“I can’t let myself waste even a second,” said Ms. Kim, who dreams of attending Harvard, Yale or another brand-name American college. And she has a good shot. This spring, as in previous years, all but a few of the 133 graduates from Daewon Foreign Language High School who applied to selective American universities won admission.

It is a success rate that American parents may well envy, especially now, as many students are swallowing rejection from favorite universities at the close of an insanely selective college application season.

“Going to U.S. universities has become like a huge fad in Korean society, and the Ivy League names — Harvard, Yale, Princeton — have really struck a nerve,” said Victoria Kim, who attended Daewon and graduated from Harvard last June.

Daewon has one major Korean rival, the Minjok Leadership Academy, three hours’ drive east of Seoul, which also has a spectacular record of admission to Ivy League colleges.

How do they do it? Their formula is relatively simple. They take South Korea’s top-scoring middle school students, put those who aspire to an American university in English-language classes, taught by Korean and highly paid American and other foreign teachers, emphasize composition and other skills crucial to success on the SATs and college admissions essays, and — especially this — urge them on to unceasing study.

Both schools seem to be rethinking their grueling regimen, at least a bit. Minjok, a boarding school, has turned off dormitory surveillance cameras previously used to ensure that students did not doze in late-night study sessions. Daewon is ending its school day earlier for freshmen. Its founder, Lee Won-hee, worried in an interview that while Daewon was turning out high-scoring students, it might be falling short in educating them as responsible citizens.

“American schools may do a better job at that,” Dr. Lee said.

Still, the schools are highly rigorous. Both supplement South Korea’s required, lecture-based national curriculum with Western-style discussion classes. Their academic year is more than a month longer than at American high schools. Daewon, which costs about $5,000 per year to attend, requires two foreign languages besides English. Minjok, where tuition, board and other expenses top $15,000, offers Advanced Placement courses and research projects.

And, oh yes. Both schools suppress teenage romance as a waste of time.

“What are you doing holding hands?” a Daewon administrator scolded an adolescent couple recently, according to his aides. “You should be studying!”

Students do not seem to complain. Park Yeshong, one of Kim Hyun-kyung’s classmates, said attractions tended to fade during hundreds of hours of close-quarters study. “We know each other too well to fall in love,” she said. Many American educators would kill to have such disciplined pupils.

Both schools reserve admission for highly motivated students; the application process resembles that at many American colleges, where students are judged on their grade-point averages, as well as their performance on special tests and in interviews.

“Even my worst students are great,” said Joseph Foster, a Williams College graduate who teaches writing at Daewon. “They’re professionals; if I teach them, they’ll learn it. I get e-mails at 2 a.m. I’ll respond and go to bed. When I get up, I’ll find a follow-up question mailed at 5 a.m.”

South Korea is not the only country sending more students to the United States, but it seems to be a special case. Some 103,000 Korean students study at American schools of all levels, more than from any other country, according to American government statistics. In higher education, only India and China, with populations more than 20 times that of South Korea’s, send more students.

“Preparing to get to the best American universities has become something of a national obsession in Korea,” said Alexander Vershbow, the American ambassador to South Korea.

Korean applications to Harvard alone have tripled, to 213 this spring, up from 66 in 2003, said William R. Fitzsimmons, Harvard’s dean of admissions. Harvard has 37 Korean undergraduates, more than from any foreign country except Canada and Britain. Harvard, Yale and Princeton have a total of 103 Korean undergraduates; 34 graduated from Daewon or Minjok.

This year, Daewon and Minjok graduates are heading to universities like Stanford, Chicago, Duke and seven of the eight Ivy League universities — but not to Harvard. Instead, Harvard accepted four Korean students from three other prep schools.

“That was certainly not any statement” about the Daewon and Minjok schools, Mr. Fitzsimmons said. “We’re alert to getting kids from schools where we haven’t had them before, but we’d never reject an applicant simply because he or she came from a school with a history of sending students to Harvard.”

South Korea’s academic year starts in March, so the 2008 class of Daewon’s Global Leadership Program, which prepares students for study at foreign universities, graduated in February.

One graduate was Kim Soo-yeon, 19, who was accepted by Princeton this month. Daewon parents tend to be wealthy doctors, lawyers or university professors. Ms. Kim’s father is a top official in the Korean Olympic Committee.

Ms. Kim developed fierce study habits early, watching her mother scold her older sister for receiving any score less than 100 on tests. Even a 98 or a 99 brought a tongue-lashing.

“Most Korean mothers want their children to get 100 on all the tests in all the subjects,” Ms. Kim’s mother said.

Ms. Kim’s highest aspiration was to attend a top Korean university, until she read a book by a Korean student at Harvard about American universities. Immediately she put up a sign in her bedroom: “I’m going to an Ivy League!”

Even while at Daewon, Ms. Kim, like thousands of Korean students, took weekend classes in English, physics and other subjects at private academies, raising her SAT scores by hundreds of points. “I just love to do well on the tests,” she said.

As bright as she is, she was just one great student among many, said Eric Cho, Daewon’s college counselor. Sitting at his computer terminal at the school, perched on a craggy eastern hilltop overlooking the Seoul skyline, Mr. Cho scrolled through the class of 2008’s academic records.

Their average combined SAT score was 2203 out of 2400. By comparison, the average combined score at Phillips Exeter, the New Hampshire boarding school, is 2085. Sixty-seven Daewon graduates had perfect 800 math scores.

Kim Hyun-kyung, 17, scored perfect 800s on the SAT verbal and math tests, and 790 in writing. She is scheduled to take nine Advanced Placement tests next month, in calculus, physics, chemistry, European history and five other subjects. One challenge: she has taken none of these courses. Instead, she is teaching herself in between classes at Daewon, buying and devouring textbooks.

So she is busy. She rises at 6 a.m. and heads for her school bus at 6:50. Arriving at Daewon, she grabs a broom to help classmates clean her classroom. Between 8 and noon, she hears Korean instructors teach supply and demand in economics, Korean soils in geography and classical poets in Korean literature.

At lunch she joins other raucous students, all, like her, wearing blue blazers, in a chow line serving beans and rice, fried dumpling and pickled turnip, which she eats with girlfriends. Boys, who sit elsewhere, wolf their food and race to a dirt lot for a 10-minute pickup soccer game before afternoon classes.

Kim Hyun-kyung joins other girls at a hallway sink to brush her teeth before reporting to French literature, French culture and English grammar classes, taught by Korean instructors. At 3:20, her English language classes begin. This day, they include English literature, taught by Mani Tadayon, a polyglot graduate of the University of California at Berkeley who was born in Iran, and government and politics, taught by Hugh Quigley, a former Wall Street lawyer.

Evening study hall begins at 7:45. She piles up textbooks on an adjoining desk, where they glare at her like a to-do list. Classmates sling backpacks over seats, prop a window open and start cramming. Three hours later, the floor is littered with empty juice cartons and water bottles. One girl has nodded out, head on desk. At 10:50 a tone sounds, and Ms. Kim heads for a bus that will wend its way through Seoul’s towering high-rise canyons to her home, south of the Han River.

“I feel proud that I’ve endured another day,” she said.

The schedule at the Minjok academy, on a rural campus of tile-roofed buildings in forested hills, appears even more daunting. Students rise at 6 for martial arts, and thereafter, wearing full-sleeved, gray-and-black robes, plunge into a day of relentless study that ends just before midnight, when they may sleep.

But most keep cramming until 2 a.m., when dorm lights are switched off, said Gang Min-ho, a senior. Even then some students turn on lanterns and keep going, Mr. Gang said. “Basically we lead very tired lives,” he said.

Students sometimes report for classes so exhausted that Alexander Ganse, a German who teaches European history, said he asked, “Did you go to bed at all last night?”

“But we’re not only nerds!” interrupted Choi Jung-yun, who grew up in San Diego. Minjok students play sports, take part in many clubs and even have a rock band, she said. Ambassador Vershbow, who plays the drums, confirmed that with photographs that showed him jamming with Minjok’s rockers during a visit to the school last year.

There are other hints of slackening. A banner once hung on a Minjok building. “This school is a paradise for those who want to study and a hell for those who do not,” it read. But it was taken down after faculty members deemed it too harsh, said Son Eun-ju, director of counseling.

Hey Jude...

2008-04-26T22:20:00.000-07:00

So much fun... So so much fun!

I met a new group of friends... from Austria! I almost feel like I am marking off all the different countries of the world. Instead of traveling there, I just meet people from new countries and places! Fantastic!

And something really cool happened... a stranger bought me a drink from across the room. I was just talking to my new friends, minding my own business and a waiter walked up and handed me a drink and told me it was from a group across the bar. It felt like I was in some sort of suave movie. Of course, I went and said thank you. But, the group was so gracious that they said they didn't want to interrupt my conversation with my friends, they just hoped I had a nice night. This has never happened to me. And then, later in the evening the same group sent me flowers! Flowers! I'm not exactly sure of their motives, but they didn't seem to be intrusive or trying to lure me away from my friends. It was like they got a kick out of surprising me. And... I got a kick out of being surprised!

I know I have said it before... but you just can't ever predict what will happen in Seoul. One minute you're reading a newspaper. The next minute someone is bringing you flowers from a stranger across the room. (It feels very... black and white movie-ish.)

Okay... onto other news.

Saran wrap! I got a pedicure yesterday and when I went to put on my shoes the lady wrapped my toes in saran wrap so that my nail polish wouldn't scratch. How bizarre! I walked around with saran wrapped feet inside my shoes.

There is no deodorant in this country. I had to go to an underground, illegal black market to find a stick of deodorant! I felt very scandalous, breaking the law and sneaking around to get my Lady Speed Stick.

And finally, the big news... I'm going home! Not permanently, but for five whole days! I got the news just a few days ago and when I called home to tell the family I found out that my parents were going to be out of town the entire time I was in California. How awful! Luckily, my hagwon is awesome and they moved my flight to the next week. So I leave Korea at 11:10am on Monday the 12th and arrive in San Francisco at 9:15am on Monday the 12th. Gotta love the time difference... I arrive in SF two hours before I leave Seoul.

And ever since I heard that I was going home, I have been thinking about how great it will be to see family. There are lots of great things to look forward to... I'm going to see my Mom's new store. I'm going to drive, eat Mexican food, drink a Jamba Juice. I'm going to get all my cute summer clothes. I'm going to sleep on a comfortable bed. But, the best part of the whole trip will be seeing my family, especially Mike! There just isn't anyone else who is even half as much fun as my little brother. In fact, Mike and I are planning a vacation this summer. He is going to come to Seoul for a week and then we are going to Hong Kong for a week! It is going to be quite a trip!

And finally... I think I got asked on a date. I haven't actually been asked to go on a date for a long long time so I'm not sure if I'm picking up on the signals. But, a cute new guy called me and asked me out for drinks on my day off. That sounds like a date to me.

Oh... and you have to see this video. This kid is too cute for words!

Melody...

2008-04-24T04:06:00.000-07:00

"I much prefer, in matters mystical and musical and deeply cosmic, to tell the logical mind to shut up and let the soul take over and say, wait wait wait, maybe most humans have this divine connection thing all wrong. Maybe God really isn't some scowling gay-hating deity raining down guilt and judgment and fear on all humankind after all.

Maybe she's actually, you know, a throb, a pulse, a song, deep, complex, eternal. And us, well, we're just bouncing and swaying along as best we can, trying to figure out the goddamn melody. "

Thanks, Mark. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Home...

2008-04-24T01:26:00.000-07:00

I'm coming home! I'm so excited I can't think about anything else!

I have to return to the US to apply for a new VISA, so I'll be back in California from May 5-9th. Wow! I get to see my family.

I'd write more, but there isn't any news that is bigger or better than that!

Every Little Things She Does...

2008-04-20T05:31:00.001-07:00

I finally finished my immigration paperwork. The rules to work in Korea have changed this year and the process for obtaining the correct VISA has become more complicated. It has been especially difficult trying to get the correct documents from California while in Korea. However, yesterday I got the paperwork signed, notarized and sealed by the US Embassy. It feels like a giant weight off my shoulders. And it also means that my paperwork is being processed, so when it is finished I'll have to go back to the US for a few days. A few days in San Fran on the company's dollar (or won)... sounds good to me!

I'm constantly surprised with how much I like Korea. Saturday afternoon I went to Itaewon to sit in a coffee shop, read and people watch. I was in my ratty, old Chuck Taylors, not looking for attention. As I was heading home, I decided to stop by Gecko's and get a beer and some dinner. I sat at the bar, started reading my Time magazine and some guy starts talking to me. We chat. He leaves. And a minute later someone pokes me. It's the guy and he invited me to drink with him and his friends. Um... okay? So, I start drinking with the group. And then we start making the rounds in Itaewon. Without any effort at all, I meet a new group of people and have a really awesome time. That kind of stuff just doesn't happen in the States. But, it can happen anytime, anywhere in Korea.

But, something else interesting happened last night... People asked me questions about Seoul. I wasn't asking the questions, following someone else's lead. I knew where to go on Saturday night, which bars had dance floors, hookah pipes or would be empty until later. I knew the best place to pick up a cab, which restaurants were open and how to get to wherever we wanted to go. It was a bit odd. I'm usually the one who is asking the questions. I've been here four months and last night I felt like I might actually have gotten the hang of this!

I've started a collection of matchbooks. Since everyone smokes here, every bar has matchbooks. Now, whenever I go to a new bar I get a matchbook. Light one of the matches. And have everyone I'm with sign the matchbook. I date it and put it in a fishbowl back at my apartment. I really like it. I already have quite a few and it will be cool to have matchbooks from different parts of the world with different people I meet when I'm there.

In other news... I love The Office. I really do. If you haven't seen the latest episode, then go download it. At the end when Jim shows what he bought after the second week... I about jumped on my bed! And then when they are walking home... I adore this show. Adore it. I am definitely going to "stay sharp."

A few other interesting (and not-so-interesting) things I've been noticing/thinking about...

I've been getting into a routine now that I started my new part-time job. After I finish my morning work, I go to a coffee shop (Starbucks, but only because they don't have any independent coffee shops... I'm not a sell out. I promise.) and order a scone and tea. I read for a an hour or two and then go to work. The guy at the counter is starting to recognize me and today he asked me if I am from England. I don't have an accent, so I was trying to figure it out... Then it struck me. I have scones and tea almost everyday. Ah ha! They might as well call me Sherlock Holmes.

I teach a couple (rotten) little kids in the afternoons. But, even they make me laugh. They constantly remind me that childhood is universal. Today my student, Tom, proudly made the statement, "Girls very very bad. Boys very very good." Even at six years old this little boy has got it figured out. And even more importantly, he is using his limited vocabulary to convey a kindergarten boy's universal truth. I'm just waiting for him to figure out the concept of "cooties."

I really want to learn more Korean. I'm not dedicating myself at all, but I know I could. I've got a great new book and clearly some spare time (that I spend eating scones and drinking tea) so there is no reason why I can't pick up a few more phrases. Not to mention, in the next two or three months I'm going to have some friends and family come visit. I want to be able to show off. It really isn't impressive when I say "Hanti Station" in Korean and the cab driver looks at me like I'm from another planet just before he realizes what I'm trying to say and then laughs in my face.

And just because I have this song in my head...

Mose...

2008-04-16T21:53:00.000-07:00

Mose, pronounced Mo-Say, is adorable.

The other day I gave Mose a thumbs-up when he did a good job. Today he tried to give me a thumbs-up, but he got a bit confused. So, instead of putting his thumb up, he put his index finger up. I corrected him, but he has had a little trouble catching on. So, now instead of giving me a thumbs up, he keeps giving me a index finger-up and saying "Good job."

Oh... and high fives! The kids love high fives. I'll be across the classroom and Mose will yell "Five" and put his hand in the air and wait for me to give him a high five. I will have to get up, walk across the room and put my hand up, or else he'll just sit there with his arm up waiting. Of course, this is a bit distracting, but not really a problem. The problem is that the kids try and give each other high fives, but keep missing and slapping each other in the head. Ha!

Lucifer...

2008-04-16T06:23:00.000-07:00

I started reading another new book called "The Lucifer Effect" and I am really intrigued. The writing is so eloquent that I find myself re-reading passages, trying to re-absorb the words and delicate construction of the thoughts and sentences. Just read...

"In contrast to the 'banality of evil,' which posits that ordinary people can be responsible for the most despicable acts of cruelty and degradation of their fellows, I posit the 'banality of heroism,' which unfurls the banner of the heroic Everyman and Everywoman who heed the call to service to humanity when their time comes to act. When that bell rings, they will know it rings for them. It sounds a call to uphold what is best in human nature that rises above the powerful pressures of Situation and System as the profound assertion of human dignity opposing evil."

Goosebumps, right? I know.

The thesis of the book is that all humans are capable of evil given the right circumstances and social pressures. But, even more interesting is the claim that these pressures are not extreme or hypothetical scenarios. They are quite common and most of us have succumb to these forces in varying degrees and at various stages of our lives. I started reading the book today and I got an immediate sense of total fear. It was incredibly strange because it felt like I was in danger, but the book wasn't telling me about a terrorist attack, new contagious disease or government intrusion... it was telling me that I was capable of evil. I immediately started to fall into a classic logical fallacy as I assumed that I was the exception to the rule... But, there is no evidence to support this conclusion. There have been plenty of times when I have made the noble social choice, but there are also moments of weakness when I have made surprising poor choices.

The author of this book is the creator of the famous 1970's Stanford Prison Experiment (http://www.prisonexp.org). If you have never read about it, I suggest you do. It will startle you. A group of students were assigned the roles of prisoners and guards in a mock jail for two weeks. Both groups of students began to identify with their roles so strongly that the experiment had to be ended after six days for fear of both physical and psychological damage to the participants. And if that isn't enough for you, read about the Milgram experiment that was conducted during the 1960's (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milgram_experiment). While neither experiment was perfect, they demonstrated a frightening side of human nature.

Nonetheless, I am going to continue my reading. Fear of human nature isn't an emotion I have ever felt before, so it will be interesting to dig a little deeper.

On a different topic... I really enjoy Wednesdays. I feel like they are my day. I don't have to work, but most everyone else does so I can just spend the day with myself. I wake up late, go to a museum or park, see a movie, read a book, go to the beauty salon, or just take myself to lunch. Most days I share with kids, coworkers, parents and friends. But, on Wednesdays I have nothing to do except enjoy the day. Saturdays I can clean and recover from my Friday night on the town, but Wednesdays are quite pleasant.

I've been thinking about my trip next year. I keep brainstorming new adventures or new things I'd like to do. For example, I'd like to spend more time in Buenos Aires. I also might like to go to Europe during the Spring and not during the Winter when it is going to be much colder. Originally I had planned Europe in January and February. Back home for March. Asia for April, May, June. And South America for July and August. Coming home for the end of August and starting school in Korea in September 2009. But, now I am re-evaluating. Maybe... South America in January and February. Europe in March and April. Home in May. Asia in June, July, August and then start school in Korea in September. Not to mention there are all the places I want to be... I want to go to the World Debate Championship in Ireland in December 2008. But, I want to be home for Christmas 2008. But, I also want to celebrate New Years 2009 in a different country. And there is a list of over 30 countries I need to whittle down in order to make a logical journey. But, for all my complaining... This is the fun part. My dad always said that for every trip you need to be willing to say, "We'll do that next time." Even if there may never be a next time, trying to include every single site and experience in one journey will ruin the whole journey. So, I'm just going to include the things and places that fit together and remind myself that if I can't do it this time, I'll do it next time!

Onto a different subject... I don't like being laughed at. I can't help it. I thought I got used to it, but I was at the police station today getting fingerprinted for some immigration paperwork and the snotty police officer started laughing at me. Come on! What does a girl have to do? I am dressed nicely. I am polite. I bring all the paperwork. I researched exactly which office I needed to go to so I wouldn't bother anybody. Cut me some slack! But, once again these experiences only increase my patience for other foreigners. I've never said it and rarely thought it, but there have been a few times when I have been annoyed by someone who couldn't speak English in the United States. NEVER AGAIN! Never. Learning another language isn't easy. And living in a world of unfamiliar words, expressions and social customs only makes the task of learning the language seem even more insurmountable.

Last tidbit... I have this semi-awesome, semi-annoying Korean pop song stuck in my head. Sing La La La by The Turtles. Youtube it. Or don't. It will be stuck in your head all day and you'll only be able to understand the chorus.

Singing Along...

2008-04-12T22:06:00.000-07:00

On the way to my friend's house last night the taxi driver put in a cassette tape of American music. He looked in the rear view mirror and asked, "You like old pop?" I nodded and suddenly the tape began to play. The Beatles. The Righteous Brothers. The Carpenters. Buddy Holly. And I started humming along. The driver started humming along. Then we both started singing along. It was just me, an old mix tape and my Korean cab driver singing... Only in Korea!

Well, more chaos at the hagwon. Two more Korean teachers quit. There has been some internal struggles with the head Korean supervisor and the two teachers decided to leave. They both offered to stay until a replacement could be found, but the supervisor told them to leave immediately. It is all a bit ridiculous. It feels like my hagwon doesn't think more than 30 minutes into the future, so it is constantly making decisions without evaluating any of the consequences. Nonetheless, I expect more disruption. But, I'll just ride out this wave too. Afterall, I'm an English teacher in Korea; a country that is currently in need of 20-30,000 more English teachers. Job security is not a concern. But, if I do this again, I am going to work fewer hours, teach more private lessons and teach kindergarten or preschool at a small hagwon. That is the way to do it! If you know how to work the system in Korea, money practically grows on trees!

However, the price you pay is your health. In the past four months I have been more sick than in the past four years combined. Largely because of the pollution and yellow sand. When I first heard of yellow sand I didn't give it much thought, but that stuff will get to you. And the pollution... it is bad bad bad. Every few weeks I get this old-man cough where I wheeze and huff my way through the day. Not to mention, everyone smokes indoors in bars, clubs and restaurants. I've lived in CA for too long and have become quite spoiled. If I go out dancing for the night and suck in that smoke for six hours, I'll be coughing and hacking the whole next day. Lovely.

I just finished a book that I found pretty interesting and entertaining. It is called, "The Know-It-All" by AJ Jacobs. It is about a man who read the Encyclopedia Britannica from A-Z. It is witty and filled with lots of useless information. My next book is "The Art of Travel" by Alain de Botton. Hmmm... It made some best seller lists somewhere.

I taught little Chloe today. I went into the class and was disappointed when I didn't see her with the students. I closed the door behind me and sat down on the floor with the kids. Then I heard a tiny tapping and scratching on the door and the Korean teacher opened it... Chloe was outside and too small to reach the door knob. She looked over at the class, looked right at me, exploded in a giant grin and ran to sit down next to me. There are very few ego boosts that compare to those moments. Everyone else can go jump off a cliff because at least Chloe thinks I'm a rockstar!

Oh... and we were learning about animals today. I pointed to a picture of a spider and Emma (another girl who is more precious than words could convey) started singing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and tried to do the hand motions from last week. She remembered!

Finally, do you remember the scene in the movie "The Wizard of Oz" where Dorthy starts down the yellow brick road and all the Munchkins surround and her and follow her to the edge of Munchkin Land? When I leave the classroom, I am surrounded by my own Munchkins. I always wave goodbye and the boys jump up and follow me all the way to the door waving and shouting, "Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye."

Like I said... I'm a total rockstar!

Two for two...

2008-04-11T02:40:00.000-07:00

I made another kid cry today.

Seriously, I can't possibly be that mean. Come on!

Beasts...

2008-04-10T02:39:00.000-07:00

Some of my students are venemous, wretched, little beasts.

I made one of them cry today. I almost felt bad.

Eleanor and Chuck...

2008-04-09T22:29:00.001-07:00

The hardest part about getting used to Korea is getting used to the social cues. In the United States if a man on the streets began talking to me and then asked for my phone number I would assume he wanted to ask me out. If a man in Korean begins talking to me on the street, I don't know if he wants to ask me out, practice his English, is amused by some ridiculous social mistake I've made or is just a friendly guy.

This happened today. A random man just started talking to me. I was walking on the sidewalk and he started asking me questions. (And let me preface... I was not lookin' good. I was dressed to go play with pre-schoolers, so I clearly wasn't looking for attention.) The questions always throw me off... They usually start with the obvious, "How are you?" "Where are you going?" But, then there are the odd ones like, "Are you Korean?" In fact, I've gotten this one more times than I would have thought. I never thought I looked Korean, but a lot of people (at least 10) have asked me if I am Korean-American. I don't mind... Koreans are some of the most beautiful people I have ever seen! Another odd question, "Do you have many Korean friends?" Who asks that kind of stuff? Why wouldn't I have friends? And, why does it matter if they are Korean or Australian or South African? Strange question, right? Nonetheless, these kind of situations happen quite frequently and I still haven't figured out the appropriate social response. Is the guy being nice? Practicing his English? Wanting to ask me out? (Not that I could blame him!) In the end, this guy asked for my number and without a good avoidance strategy, I gave it to him. I also labelled him as "NO!" in my phone so that I'll know to avoid his calls. Of course, I am aware that this is not the best way to handle these kind of moments. Was I being a bit rude and childish? Yes. Should I find a better way to handle these situations? Yes. Do I live by myself in a foreign country? Yes. Do I need to be more careful than I would be at home? Yes. Do I put myself in risky situations by going out with strangers? No.

On a different note... The Office returns this week. I love this show. I love it. Love. Love. Love. Love it. I hadn't watched a single episode for at least five months and I left my Season 1-3 DVDs at home. So, when I watched an episode last night I could hardly breath I was laughing so hard. But, the best part is that I wasn't really laughing at the jokes, I was laughing before the jokes because I remembered how funny they were going to be. Oh, I can hardly wait.

Speaking of things I love... I bought a new pair of Chuck Taylors. I think Chuck Taylors are an understated kind of cool. They are an old-fashioned kind of hip. It's like listening to the Beatles on your ipod. Everybody knows them. They are classic. But, come in such variety that you can pick and choose to fit your mood. And more importantly, they transcend time. Becoming brand new for each generation. Coming with you wherever your destination may be. I think I'm an Eleanor Rigby kind of Chuck Taylor.

I've started to be able to recognize the distance of a motor bike just by listening. There are so many little side streets and blind corners, that I can be walking and just instinctively know to stop and wait for a little delivery motorbike to come speeding around the corner. I think everyone in Korea picks up on this survival skill.

I sang the "Itsey Bitsey Spider" song to my pre-schoolers today with the clever hand motions. Let me tell you... I might as well have been Mick Jagger. These kids thought I was a rock star. And Chloe and Mose were as cute as ever. All the kids are starting to remember my name so all morning long I heard "Jacki Teacher. Jacki Teacher. Jacki Teacher." Good times.

Kindergartners...

2008-04-07T23:50:00.000-07:00

I just started a new part-time job today. I am teaching kindergartners and preschoolers for about six hours a week. I don't actually need to work more or need the money, but it is awesome pay and I get to sit on the floor and color for two hours. It couldn't be easier. All the students are four and five years olds and boy, are they cute! One little girl, who became my favorite after about five minutes, is named Chloe. (That isn't her real name, it is just her English name.) She saw me around the corner and started giggling and waving. "Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello." That is the only word she could say. Chloe suddenly disappeared, but a minute later I heard her coming back "Yogi Yogi" and she pointed around the corner at me. "Yogi" means "here" in Korean and she had brought other students in order to show off her discovery.

Probably the cutest part of all is how small the students are. It's like being surrounded by Lilliputians. They are the tiniest, littlest people I have ever seen. When I walked down the stairs to one of the classrooms, a line of four year olds was coming upstairs. Each stair reached almost to their knee and they had to take giant steps to mount each one. And despite their long journey up one flight of stairs, when I walked by they stopped just to stare. I gave one of them a high-five and the boy's face exploded in a grin and he about dislocated his arm trying to give me a big high-five. And yet, despite their mini-size they have observant eyes the size of silver dollars. They are constantly looking and absorbing everything.

It occurred to me that the term "child like wonderment" or "awe" is an interesting concept. It isn't that children are more curious or inquisitive, but instead that they are surrounded by more new things. Their youth increases the number of new experiences they will encounter in a day, thereby increasing their propensity for astonishment and fascination. If adults were surrounded by an equal number of new experiences, I think they would be more likely to be confronted with daily curiosity and wonderment. Just imagine the first time you heard the alphabet song...

The alphabet song! What a brilliant idea! What a lovely tune! In fact, I'll sing it right now and a hundred more times after that! What a fantastic, delightful coincidence that we both can sing the alphabet song together.... Oh, how lucky we are!

That is the kind of excitement that comes from children. It is the excitement of something new. I know it's true. After all, I speak from experience.

Experience: Reading Korean letters
Jacki's Response: This is the greatest day of my life.

Experience: Ordering food at a Korean restaurant for the first time.
Jacki's Response: This is the greatest day of my life.

Experience: Taking a Korean taxi cab for the first time (without getting lost)
Jacki's Response: This is the greatest day of my life.

Maybe you are starting to notice a pattern.

There is no doubt that curiosity and wonderment are the defining characteristics of childhood. But, I think life is far more fun when curiosity and wonderment can transcend youth and become the defining characteristics of a lifestyle.

But, speaking of youth and curiosity... Let me tell you about another one of my students names Mose. (Once again, English name not his Korean name.) Not only do I love the name, but the kid reminds me of my favorite person. Mose is so bright. He picks up on colors, patterns and numbers very quickly and likes to answer questions. He is cute as a button and so tiny that he is about the size of a button! But, what caught my attention was his lazy eye. It isn't too prevalent, but it is definitely there. For those of you who aren't familiar with the term "lazy eye" it means that one eye will sometimes drift off to the side. Most people when they look at something, subconsciously direct both eyes toward the object. However, a person with a lazy eye will have one eye drift off to one side or the other, and probably won't even realize it. It will look their eyes are looking in two different directions. Mose's right eye has a tendency to drift in toward his nose. I noticed it immediately and that is about how long it took for me to come to adore him!

In other news... I found a bug in my apartment. God damn it.

The only reason I would be in support of global domination by a communist superpower is that I wouldn't have to deal with mountains of immigration paperwork... Enough already! Just let me live in Korea and leave me alone!

Finally, shout out to Cynthia who turned 175 today (in dog years). She is old and going to get married and have babies. Luckily she still looks 25, has a rockin' body and helps make the rest of us poor, miserable slobs into better, kinder people. Nonetheless, I still say ditch the guy and come to Korea. Soju is way better than career success, relationship bliss and financial stability. Come on... throw it all away and come color with preschoolers! (You're the best. Happy, happy birthday!)

The Letter U...

2008-04-05T11:06:00.001-07:00

Watch this. And try not to fall of your chair.

It's not him. It's us...

2008-04-04T04:33:00.000-07:00

The Very Best Thing About Barack Obama
No, not that. Or that or that or that. It's that other thing, deeper, crazier, intuitive

By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
Friday, April 4, 2008

Nope, it's not what you might think. The best thing about Barack Obama has almost nothing to do with him as a person or as a leader or even as Oh My God The First Black President Who Could Really Change Everything I Mean Wow. It's not even the wondrous oratory power or the charisma or the sweet sense of deeper change overlaid with all kinds of sparkly utopian futuriffic goodness.

There is, I think, something more. Something richer. And it's rather startling.

See, I've read the profiles and the liberal fawnings and the intelligent analysis, the attempted takedowns and the right-wing smears, all the valiant attempts to dig up something dirty or problematic or frightening about Obama and his family, his past, his middle name, his beliefs and his pastor and his favorite flavor of ice cream — attempts that, rather amusingly, have all failed.

I've read, too, the glut of wonderment, how Obama is this generation's JFK, how he makes Hillary Clinton's brand of retro cronyist politics feel like the equivalent of rubbing salt on a paper cut. He is, they say, that once-in-a-lifetime candidate, a fantastically rare mix of intelligence, consistency, inspiration, hope, charisma, humanity, articulation, and an almost shocking lack of manipulation and sheen (well, relatively speaking), all packaged in a strikingly handsome unit in whose closet apparently live almost no skeletons at all.

I also nodded in agreement when snark-master Jon Stewart appeared slightly stunned and taken aback and very nearly jokeless as he pointed out, following Obama's remarkable speech on race in America, that at long last, here was a top-tier politician who dared to speak to us like we were adults. It wasn't just refreshing; after seven-plus years of humiliating, monosyllabic dumb-guy Bushisms, it was downright jarring.

And I even enjoyed the overall assessment that the fact that Obama is untested and inexperienced in the higher and more dire realms of government is actually a good thing, just the kind of wild card we crave and need, given how he shows absolutely zero signs that he'd screw it up, not to mention how the last thing anyone really wants is more of the same old-school, inbred crap we've had for decades.

Still, this wasn't what riveted me the most about Obama, still not what's most fascinating about this moment in political history. It was still something more.

Initially I thought the most impressive aspect of Obama's run was, well, how the guy made it this far at all. That someone of his caliber and obvious intelligence could survive what has become a truly caustic, brutal political system and still emerge into the international spotlight as, well, not deeply f—ed-up and insane, not possessing that creepy demonic gleam shared by so many politicos (hi, Sen. McCain!) that suggests they've had souls eaten whole by the same scabrous trolls of greed and war and corruption that birthed two Bushes and gave Bill Clinton that nearly intolerable aura of ego and slickness.

See, I've long believed that, if nearly eight years of the World's Worst President has taught us anything, it's that the American political system has moved well beyond merely deeply flawed and broken and sad, and is now wholly rotted, ruined from the inside out, a true moral wasteland barely suitable even for cockroaches and leeches and Rick Santorum. I thought George W. Bush had actually managed to do the impossible: make an already defective system truly unbearable, turning something already gray and murky to turgid and pathetic, toxic to all decent human life.

And I'm happy to report that the fact that Obama exists at this stage of the game is proving me very wrong indeed.

But I'll even take it a step further. Because the greatest thing about Obama isn't really about Obama at all, per se. It's actually about, well, us.

This is the great revelation: We still got it. The collective unconscious, the deep sense of inner wisdom, that intuitive knowing that borders on a kind of mystical proficiency, where millions of people can actually look beyond rhetoric and media spin and merely feel the presence of something great in the room? Yep, still there. Who knew?

See, this is what I hear most from relatives and readers and friends and newborn activists who were never activists before: Obama speaks to the intuition. It's about the sixth sense. It's not just what he says or how he behaves in the debates or the policy wonking or the "Change" banners or any of the typical, tangible factors — although those have proven to be remarkably positive, too.

It's this: People feel it. They hear an Obama speech or read the articles or talk to like-minded folk, and they squint their eyes and weigh everything and then dismiss all that surface crap and get that look on their face that says, you know what? This guy gets it. He feels right. It's not a trick of light. It's not complete bulls—. It's not the usual spin and manipulation and fakery. There is actual meat on this bone. What a thing.

Of course, I've plenty of readers who are die-hard cynics and jaded anarchists who say: What the f— is wrong with you? Can't you see it's just another vicious ploy? All candidates at this level are essentially the same, interchangeable, all abhorrent simply by default because when you reach that stage of the game there is simply no way to avoid deep corruption and rampant lies. They tell me that even just to write a column like this is akin to merely washing the windows in your little pod in "The Matrix." Sure, the world may seem shinier, but you're still just buying into the same old revolting corporate/military machine.

After all, once the vipers of big money and big oil and military spending and corporate cronyism get their fangs sunk in, it's pretty much "game over" for any candidate's remaining integrity. Has Mr. Perfect Obama spoken out against the insidious Patriot Act or taken on the absurd farm subsidies or talked up issues of global warming? No he has not. As nice and smart as he may be, strip away all the fawning and the oratory tricks and give him a year in office and boom, just another corrupted, compromised former visionary. Right?

Whatever. I'm not buying it. At least, not yet. For the moment, I trust the collective intuition. I trust the shockingly widespread sense, not merely of hope and change, but of collective wisdom swimming though the air like an electrical surge between every smart, creative person on the planet right now, a bolt of energy that says: Hey, we're still together. We still got it. Smart, intuitive people are still a force. There is life in the revolution yet.

And Obama? He gets it, too. Hell, he may have kindled it anew, all by himself. Either way, it's back. And it's powerful. And that, to me, is the most hopeful thing of all.

Instructions...

2008-04-02T11:34:00.000-07:00

When you have a bad day, a wind-kicked-out-of-you kind of day...

Call a good friend. Cry a little on the phone.

Dance in your room until you feel better.
(I recommend Sting or The Police.)

Go to bed.

Try it again tomorrow.

Repeat if necessary.

Answer of the Day...

2008-03-28T05:52:00.000-07:00

Jacki: What do you call all living things?

Student: Refrigerators.

Jacki (inside her head): You are the dumbest kid I've ever met.

Irony...

2008-03-27T09:22:00.000-07:00

After having written such nice things about teaching... Irony strikes!

My kids were total terrors today.

Cheating.
Thousands of questions.
Complaining.
Non-stop chatter.

I just wanted to pull my hair out.

Kids!?! Eh!

I'm not dead...

2008-03-26T23:56:00.000-07:00

My goodness, things have been busy here in Korea.

Let's start with the most exciting... I went to Japan. And my hagwon paid! It turns out that I needed to leave the country in order to apply for the appropriate VISA and remain a resident of South Korea. The nearest Korean consulate office is in Japan so my school bought me a plane ticket to Japan. I only stayed for two days and one night, but that is two days more than I had ever been to Japan. What is interesting about my excitement is that most people just thought my trip was common place. It reminded me of California. In California, Mexico is a pretty common destination. Of course, traveling to Mexico is always an adventure, but due to its proximity it has gained a sense of commonality... Everyone has been to Mexico. That is how Koreans feel about Japan. Fukuoka (my destination) is an hour and half plane ride from Seoul. In fact, Fukuoka is closer to Seoul than to Tokyo. So, most people who heard I was going to Japan thought it was cool... but not that cool.

Nonetheless, I was thrilled. I left early Wed. morning, hit up the Korean embassy and then started my adventure. I wandered the streets and subways of Fukuoka for three or four hours until my poor feet were exhausted and soaked. It was raining, cold and windy. I visited shrines, a historic park and finally took refuge in the Fukuoka Art Museum. And guess what they had on display... An actual ANDY WARHOL! Seriously! It was the piece titled “Elvis. ” I must have just sat in front of the artwork for 30 minutes. Not to mention pieces by Joan Miro and Jean-Michel Basquiat. It was a good day! The next day I simply gave up. It was so rainy and cold that I just couldn’t wander anymore and I went to the movies, went shopping and explored the underground subway malls and shopping centers. I felt a little guilty having come to Japan just to be a total tourist, but I figure it just gives me an excuse to go back and explore Japan properly!

And then when I returned to Korea I moved into my new apartment! How awesome! So, here’s the story… When the principal at my hagwon got fired a lot of changes were made in order to improve the efficiency and cost effectiveness of the school. One of these measures was to move me into a new apartment. Apparently my old apartment was too expensive. I didn’t really have a choice in the matter, I was just told that I was going to be moving. You can imagine my concern. The apartment I was residing in was the size of a glorified shoebox and was “too expensive.” If they were going to move me to a cheaper place I was really worried that I was going to end up someplace worse. But, it turns out that my new apartment is SO much better! It is closer to my favorite restaurants, the gym and the subway station. It is bigger, has more furniture and is laid out better so that I have room for a comfy chair and a little table. In fact, I just got a rug for the place yesterday! There is a big open space in the center of the room so I still have a perfect private dance floor. I have more windows, hot water and a bigger closet. Of course, there are a few things that are worse. The kitchenette area is worse. The bathroom is smaller, a bit stranger and has a leaky pipe. The washing machine is broken so I need to get it fixed and the whole place is a bit dingy-er. But, I can deal with all of those things... especially if I now have more dance space!

In other news...

Last night I got hit on by a guy from Jamaica, a guy from France and a guy from New Zealand. The first observation to be made from these facts is that I’m awesome. But, once we move past the obvious... Think about the diversity! Think about the different cultures and reasons for being in Korea. Of course, Korea is one of the most homogeneous regions in the world, but in Seoul and especially in Itaewon, the foreigners congregate and you never know what you'll find or who you'll run into.

In Japan I found an awesome pair of jeans. The right color. The right fit. I love them. I am never going to take them off.

I started jogging/ power walking again. My diet has seen a dramatic increase in beer, rice and noodles, so it is time to get moving. Since I work from 2-10 I’ve been exercising after work at around 2am. It’s great! The air is cool. There aren’t a lot of people on the sidewalks, but there are still plenty of convenience stores open and business people out and about so that I feel safe. It is quite refreshing.

As an adult I find it interesting that I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t know what the Equator was or had never heard of the Animal Kingdom or didn’t know the definition of the word “boundary.” But, there must have been a moment when I learned these things. There must have been a day when I woke up unaware and by the time I went to bed that night had become enlightened. But, I just don’t remember. I took the knowledge for granted. But, now I am on the other side of the teacher/student relationship. I don’t kid myself, thinking that I’m an unforgettable, remarkable teacher and that my students will remember all my lectures and moments when they learned something new. Most of them are just studying for the test or to appease their over-protective, over-zealous parents. And I definitely don’t want to exaggerate my role, but I do feel like I’m helping them to grow up a little. I like to think that if the person I am today is an accumulation of the knowledge and experiences I’ve gathered over the past 23 years then the people who shared or provided the knowledge played a pretty important role. Even if their roles varied in size and significance. After all, I remember the cool Ms. Dietrich in 6th grade with her thick, wavy hair who played “Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds” when we learned about “Lucy,” the archaeological discovery. Mr. Athenour, the awful Spanish substitute teacher, always sounded like he was coughing up phlegm when he pronounced Jacquelyn in Spanish. (“Hawk-olina”) How could I forget the librarians at all my schools who figured out how much I liked to read and would set aside new books they thought I’d like. I even remember the lyrics to a science song my mom used to play in the car “98 million miles away is the star that gives us light.” And of course, there are the teachers and people who probably wouldn’t even recognize me in a crowd, but who I vividly remember… US History with the funny, self-deprecating Mr. Miller. Mr. Mahar, the inventive elementary school principal. Ms. Robinson, the over-medicated English teacher.

To make this long story a little shorter, I think these kids might be learning something. And if learning results in growth, then these kids are growing up a little at a time. And it's fun to be part of it.

The Wonder Years...

2008-03-13T08:42:00.000-07:00

I'm not a big TV show crier. Every now and then my eyes will mist over, but only for the true TV couples and heartbreaks... Mulder and Scully, Josh and Donna, Jim and Pam. Like I said, only the true TV romances. But, there is one couple that has been bringing me to tears on a regular basis for the past two weeks...

Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper.

I've been treating myself to a Wonder Years marathon over the past few weeks. As a kid I watched the television show on Nick-at-Nite especially during the summer when they would play re-runs of the show during "Block Party Summer." I loved the show then, but it never occurred to me that the show was never made for kids. Of course it was wholesome television and entertaining, but the show is truly for those who are no longer kids. Years ago I'd watch the show and think about how cute Fred Savage was and how I was so glad I had dark hair like Winnie Cooper. But, as a 12 year old junior high school viewer there was no way for me to truly appreciate the essense of the show. Because the show isn't about a 12-year old junior high school student. The show is about an adult remembering what it was like to be a 12-year old junior high school student. And it isn't until you grow up that you realize that there is a difference.

Those really were the Wonder Years.

Just keep writing...

2008-03-13T01:27:00.000-07:00

I’ve been meaning to write on the blog for the past couple of days, but I just haven’t been able to articulate a single interesting story. Lots of things are happening (as usual), however I seem to be confronted with a case of writer’s block. But, my father told me that even when I have nothing to write I should just start typing and see what comes out… So, here we go.

I’m going to Japan next week. I have deal with some immigration stuff, so I have to leave the country and go to the nearest Korean embassy. That happens to be in Osaka, Japan. I’ll only be there for two days, but that is two days longer than I’ve ever spent in Japan. Very excited!

I’m moving into a new apartment next week. I haven’t seen the apartment. I have no idea if it is bigger, smaller, closer to the school, farther away, etc. I just know that my apartment was getting too expensive for the school and that the former principal was responsible for my apartment, so I am being moved. I’ve been told the apartment is bigger (it couldn’t be any smaller), but there are no guarantees. I like change so I’m looking forward to the move, but I’m balancing that excitement with the worry that I’ll end up with a crappy place to live.

The other day I was out with some friends and one of the girls at the table knew how to read palms. I had her read mine. According to her reading, I am going to live an average length life. I have above average intellegence. I am very independent, like adventure and change, but appreciate guidance. I will meet a handsome man (obviously!), but I will be a bit of a wanderer until around age forty when I will finally settle down. The reading sounded good to me!

On another rather fun evening, I acquired a couple new family members… most interestingly, a big brother. My brother, Gabe, is older. We are from Denver, Colorado and he has been in Korea for two years. He told me how much he liked it here, so I followed in his footsteps and moved out here two months ago. I'm kinda nervous about being here, but I’m so glad to have my big brother to show me around. This was the story my friend and I built. We had a couple people believing it too. To people who doubted us we’d ask, “No seriously, just look at us. Everyone always tells us we look alike.” A few particularly gullible people responded that we did, in fact, look alike. For the record… Gabe and I do not look anything alike! Good times.

I’ve been teaching science to 4th and 5th graders and I have to say… I am much better at this than I expected. And of course, the kids are very funny. We’ve been talking about plant cells and animal cells. One of the kids spoke up and told me that some humans are plants. I told him that that was impossible, but he explained that some people are plants and just lay in bed all day. I asked, “Do you mean that some people are vegetables?” He was talking about lazy people. Ha! Of course there is the classic mispronunciation of the word “organism.” According to my kids all living things are “orgasms” and can be divided into kingdoms.

All is well in Korea.

Shout out to my good friends Brian and Lindsey. Both have clearly proven themselves to be both rockstars and achievers! (Not that there was ever any doubt!)

Enchanted...

2008-03-05T07:49:00.000-08:00

"Asked on CBS's "The Early Show" whether she and Obama should be on the same ticket, Clinton said:

'That may be where this is headed, but of course we have to decide who is on the top of ticket. I think the people of Ohio very clearly said that it should be me.'"

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/campaign_rdp

What is this?

Someone needs to vanquish this witch!

Oh... and when this election is made into a movie. Susan Sarandon would make the perfect Hillary Clinton!

(I just finished watching Enchanted. What an adorable movie!)

Changes...

2008-03-03T22:02:00.001-08:00

Well, things are changing... for better and worse!

Yesterday was the first day back to work after Mr. Lee was fired. And even on the first day the changes were evident!

There was a meeting with all the teachers. Schedules were handed out to every teacher. The textbooks were properly labeled and curriculum schedules for the entire month were distributed. Each teacher was only scheduled for the days they were contractually obligated to work. It was wonderful! Everything was organized. Everyone knew exactly where they needed to be, when they needed to be there and what was expected during class!

A few other benefits...

1. I no longer teach on Saturdays! Hooray! Of course, I have lost the overtime pay that I earned on Saturdays, but I can go out with my friends who all have the weekends free!
2. I also don't have to teach TOEFL classes anymore! TOEFL classes are the training classes for the English-As-A-Foreign-Language tests that students have to take in order to attend foreign schools. TOEFL classes are boring! (Think of how exciting your SAT prep courses were... See what I mean?)
3. I get to teach two of my favorite little boys... Tom and Harry. They are about five years old and the silliest little boys you have ever met! They can't sit still for even thirty seconds, but they laugh and giggle, so I can't stay mad.
4. There is MUCH less prep work for all my classes. Teaching 5th grade history takes much less effort to explain than trying to convey the implications of anthropocentrisim and cost/benefit impact analysis to middle school children!

Nonetheless, changes are usually bittersweet. I no longer teach my favorite debate class. It was a group of about six students, all boys and one girl. The boys were rowdy and really goofy. The girl was quiet and shy, intimidated by the boy's extroverted personalities. But, the girl became more confident and the boys became more focused and I always had a very good time!

In fact, this wasn't the only debate class I lost. I lost most of my debate classes! I'm teaching mostly elementary (4th and 5th grade) US history and science. I still teach some debate on the weekends, but only on Sundays. What a shame!

But, as you can see there are many more positives than negatives. I'm very happy with my situation.

Onto other news...

I'm reading Robert Penn Warren's "All the King's Men." I've wanted to read it for awhile, but I just hadn't made time. I came across a passage that I thought was beautifully written...

" The end of man is knowledge, but there is one thing he can't know. He can't know whether knowledge will save him or kill him. He will be killed, all right, but he can't know whether he is killed because of the knowledge which he has got or because of the knowledge which he hasn't got and which if he had it, would save him. There's the cold in your stomach, but you open the envelope, you have to open the envelope, for the end of man is to know."

I'm going to the American embassy tomorrow. I know it sounds silly, but I am really looking forward to those 45 minutes I'll spend on American soil.

By the end of the month I'm going to have to make a 3-4 day trip to Japan. Poor me.

Within three months I'll have to take a 4-5 day trip to California. Poor me, again.

I don't think I'm going to be getting a bigger apartment. I may be stuck in my shoebox for the next nine months. In that case... I'll make it a bad ass shoebox!

Big Foot...

2008-03-01T21:51:00.000-08:00

One more funny story.

The other day I was walking home and I noticed a very small child (3-4 years old) staring at me as I turned the corner. I looked over, smiled and waived. At the top of his lungs he pointed at me and shouted "America person" in Korean. He turned and ran away as fast as he could. I kept walking, laughing to myself. A moment later I heard more yelling. The boy had returned with his sister and was pointing to me as I walked away. The only words I recognized were, "America person."

Maybe they think that Americans are simply urban legends.

In that case, just call me Big Foot.

Leap Year...

2008-03-01T06:19:00.000-08:00

Well, the past few days have been crazy! Totally unpredictable.

A few weeks ago our hagwon expanded and all the high school and middle school staff moved to the fifth floor in our building while the elementary staff stayed on the third floor. We were using new classrooms and just getting organized in our new offices. It seemed as though the school was growing and all was well... I was wrong!

At about 9:30pm on Tuesday, I was just getting my things organized to go home and one of the supervisors came into the office and told everyone that they needed to pack all their things and move them back to the third floor. Very surprised, and a bit nervous, I gathered my things and started moving downstairs. A group of five big Korean guys started tearing down the offices... unhooking computers, moving desks, clearing furniture and hauling it out of the office. Within thirty minutes the fifth floor offices were bare and it was obvious that something was very wrong. Two of the supervisors pulled aside the foreign teachers and explained that the investors had just fired the principle and that the hagwon was being downsized, back to its original size. Our jobs were safe. Everything was fine. But, Mr. Lee (the principal) had been lying about the hagwon finances and he was immediately fired.

It was incredibly chaotic. It felt like a movie scene where a fly-by-night organization was being shut down in order to get out of town with all the money they stole.

But, let me give you a few more interesting details.

A few weeks ago we lost one of our most important teachers at the school. She was tired of Mr. Lee's disorganization and disrespect so she decided to take a vacation and then work somewhere else. We had been really struggling to fill in the gaps. But, then last week another really important teacher, Cathy, just quit. Out of the blue, she just said she wasn't coming back. If you have been reading this blog, you'll remember the previous post about how the school was too disorganized to fill-in for her classes and it was a last-minute scramble to cover the schedule. Well, on Tuesday night when I was moving my stuff back to the third floor, Cathy was there. I was really surprised. Here is what happened....

The Korean teachers at the school have hated Mr. Lee for a long time and tried to get him fired, but failed. So, when the first teacher left a weeks ago things got chaotic, but not enough for Mr. Lee to be fired. So, Cathy plotted with some of the other teachers. She went to the major investor, told him that she was quitting entirely because of Mr. Lee. After she left, the Korean teachers knew that her classes needed to be covered. (The Korean teachers are amazing... So smart! So organized! Really fantastic!) But, this time they decided to just let Mr. Lee and the supervisor do their jobs. They weren't going to step in and cover the classes. And, of course, just as the Korean teachers predicted... Mr. Lee didn't do his job and the classes were awful and the kids and parents complained. This incident and the financial "discrepancies" were enough to inspire the investors to fire Mr. Lee.

Of course, I found out about all of this later over beers with the other teachers. It was brilliant! As soon as Mr. Lee was fired, the investors immediately asked Cathy to come back (thank god!) and things are already MUCH more organized. I am particularly happy because Cathy sits next to me in the office and she is an awesome desk-mate!

And the last detail... I got a text message from Mr. Lee yesterday. He wants to meet with me and talk "important business." He sent the same message to another English teacher at the hagwon. He's going to try and steal us to come work with him. There is no way that is going happen!

Crazy, huh?
Gotta love this shit!

Onto other fun stories...

The debate tournament this weekend has been so much fun! I had to give the PM speech in the demo debate and I was excited, but SO nervous. My hands were shaking. It was only about 100 people and I got a knot in my stomach! No kidding. I can assure you that debating is not like riding a bike. When it comes to debating skills... Use it or lose it!

And, I have an embarrassing confession. I was the PM, but either my partner or I could give the final rebuttal speech. I was so nervous that I let my partner give the speech. I acted as though I was being generous and gracious... But, I let me nerves get the best of me. It was pretty bizarre and personally unacceptable for irrational fear to take control. But, I'm trying to defy my tendency to be too hard on myself, and I've decided to let myself have this one slip-up. Here is my rational. Leap Year! It was Feb 29th when I acted like a total debate-pansy! It must have been the extra day, the moon cycles or the pattern of the stars that was throwing me off. So, I'm going to allow myself to wuss out once every four years. But, that means that I've already met my quota for the next four years. I'm going to have to step it up!

Jacki is not a pansy!

And while I am not a pansy, I am a total hobo! Last night I met up with a couple of my friends in Gangnam. We had such a goofy time. These guys are really funny and every time we go out, it always ends up being a kickback, go-with-the-flow night! Well, by 2:30am it was down to just two of us. We were done drinking and grabbed fast food just as the restaurant was closing... but we had no place to eat! Looking for warmth, we just sat on the floor in the subway station. Seriously. Leaned up against the wall and kicked it in Gangnam station. We looked like homeless people! I have no doubt we probably contracted numerous diseases and viruses from the filthy station, but it was really fun. Good times.

One more debate note; my students are winning rounds! They are so proud... glowing with energy and excitement! And I am more than happy to reward them with double high-fives for their achievements!

Finally... I have an awesome purse! It is an authentic Harvey seat belt purse that I've had since Christmas, but just never used. I pulled it out my closet and it is finally making its debut. It looks awesome and is my new favorite purse. Way to go Mom... Great present!

Prime Minister...

2008-02-28T04:10:00.000-08:00

This weekend my hagwon is hosting a small debate workshop for all of the students. On Friday, we are teaching about debate and on Saturday and Sunday we are hosting a small tournament. As part of the workshop on Friday the teachers are doing a demonstration debate.

I am going to be Prime Minister.

Those of you who have known me as a debater will understand why I am so thrilled. For the rest of you... Let me see if I can explain.

In Parliamentary debate there are two teams with two people on each team. The members of each team have specific titles and speak in a particular order. Debaters often take great pride in their position because they have to develop specific skills and abilities in order to fulfill their role and support their partner. On the government team (or the pro team) there is the Prime Minister and the Member of Government. On the opposition team (or the con team) there is the Leader of Opposition and the Member of Opposition.

I was always Prime Minister. The Prime Minister is the first person to speak. They develop a case in support of the resolution and it is their job to set the parameters for the debate by offering definitions and a criteria for weighing the arguments in the round. If the Prime Minister fails to establish a prima facie case (a complete and defensible case) then the debate round is already lost. The Prime Minister is the first impression and must be eloquent, believable and thorough. In addition to being the first speaker, the Prime Minister is also the last speaker in the debate. They give the final rebuttal, having the responsibility of summarizing the entire debate and selling the government case. They are the government team's last hope.

I have always been Prime Minister.

But, just so I don't sound so arrogant... Let me explain the real reason why I have always been PM. It's because I am barely a mediocre Member of Government. After the Prime Minister sets up the case the Leader of Opposition spends eight minutes tearing it shreds. The LO will offer counter plans, critiques, disadvantages, procedural arguments and counter definitions... Pretty much anything they can think of to punch holes in the government advocacy. And once the brutal Leader of Opposition sits down it is the job of the Member of Government to repair the damage. They don't have fifteen minutes of prep time (like the Prime Minister has) to set up their defense. They have to be ready to respond immediately, impulsively and strategically. They must respond to every opposition argument and in some cases, develop entirely new arguments in order to attack the opposition case. I've seen MG's stand at the podium and run entire arguments with only three words worth of notes. They don't have time to be eloquent, they are too busy plugging the holes in the government case. They have to be vicious and efficient... A really good MG is hard to find, but I've been unbelievably lucky.

Just a quick shout out to all my MGs. I've had three different partners and each has been smart, strategic and bad ass! A PM is nothing without her MGs!

So, like I said... I'm thrilled to step back into my PM shoes. I loved debate. I still love debate. I was captain of my team (Capt'n Jack) and I watched the team grow from four debaters and a whining, apathetic coach, to 20 debaters and a zealous, do-anything-for-the-team coach. I know what debate can do for a person. It took me around the world. It made me a more socially responsible person. It challenged me, even in an arena I thought I'd already mastered. And most of all... It gave me confidence and independence.

I'm teaching debate now. And tomorrow I'm going to show all my kids how I used to debate. I was practicing earlier today and I felt that old feeling. I remembered how I'd step up to the podium, roll up my sleeves, wipe the smile off my face, grasp the edge of the podium, take a calming breath, make brief eye contact with the judge and begin to speak. But, tonight I had to pause before I began because I wanted to smile. It felt good to be behind the podium. It felt good to be PM.

Orange Juice...

2008-02-27T23:42:00.000-08:00

I'm sick. I never get sick.

I'm now drinking orange juice by the carton.

The New Black...

2008-02-26T02:51:00.001-08:00

I am not a big Hillary Clinton fan. She has integrity problems that I just can't overlook, but I do adore Tina Fey... the hair, the glasses, the smart and irreverent sense of humor. What's not to like? Tina is a Hillary fan and last week while hosting SNL, Tina made a return to the Weekend Update desk to support Hillary. If you haven't seen it... You need to make that happen. www.nbc.com. After all, "Bitch is the new black."

Onto other news...

1. I rode in a Korean police car. In order to complete some paperwork I needed to get fingerprinted. I arrived at my local police station, had a Korean friend explain my situation to the police officer over the telephone and then waited naively, thinking that I would be able to accomplish my task. After an hour and half and being driven to three different police stations around town, I was told that they can't fingerprint foreigners. Despite my frustration, I just had to smile and laugh to myself after I left. There must have been half a dozen police officers trying to figure out if they could fingerprint me. And instead of calling or determining a plan, they just piled me in the back of the squad car and hauled me around town. I've heard the saying "Korea is where logic comes to die." And if that isn't proof enough, just keep reading!

2. My school has been losing Korean teachers. Many of the Korean teachers are tired of the disorganization and have decided to quit. The worst part is that the school hasn't made any changes to accommodate the loss of staff. Last week two of the most important Korean teachers for the high school program quit. Instead of hiring more teachers, reassigning their classes or reorganizing the existing classes, the supervisors just hoped it would all work out. And today, five minutes before the class the supervisor said "I don't know who is going to cover Cathy's class." I pleasantly looked at him, pasted a smile on my face and said "Haven't you known Cathy would no longer be teaching since last week?"

This is pretty standard in hagwons. Nonetheless, I'm just rolling with the punches. In about 10 minutes another class starts that was suppose to be taught by Cathy. I absolutely know that the supervisor will appear within the next 9 minutes and ask me if I can teach the class. I've never taught the class. I have no idea what Cathy was teaching. And all the other teachers have gone home for the day. But, that is just the way it works around here. I could tell the supervisor "No way" and there is nothing he could do about it. But, instead I'll just gather the notes I prepared earlier this afternoon (when I first realized that I would be stuck in this predicament) and simply do my best... Then play a game for the rest of the class! Like I said, just rolling with the punches.

3. It snowed yesterday. It was lovely. I still can't believe I live in a place where it snows.

4. I went on the US military base last week. Very cool. A couple of my military friends needed to be back on base my curfew (1am), so we decided to go drink at the bar on base. People used American currency to pay for their drinks and everyone spoke English. It was a bit startling... and a bit fantastic!

5. While on base one of my friends bought me the latest issue of The Economist! It was the best part of my night. For the rest of the night we danced and drank, but I have to admit that a secret part of me wanted to order a beer and find a quiet spot to read my magazine. (These are the moments when I just have to hide my inner nerd!) Despite all my google news alerts and online updates, I miss being able to read a newspaper or a really good news magazine. I like the tangible news sources to the point-and-click online versions. They always have letters to the editor (Dear Sir,), political cartoons and articles on things I wouldn't read about unless the story was right in front of me.

Total nerd. I know. I know. I know.

Alright... I'd love to write more, but my supervisor just came in and asked me to cover Cathy's class. Surprise, surprise.

Rolling with the punches. Just rolling with the punches.

Seriously...

2008-02-23T21:46:00.000-08:00

What is with Clinton?

I have been trying to determine why this video bothers me. I usually appreciate the strategy and gamesmanship of a campaign, but this clip has gotten under my skin in a way that seems to escape successful articulation. Nonetheless, my preliminary conclusion is that I am annoyed and disappointed by Clinton's lack of plausible sincerity. Her condemnation of Obama as a political maneuverer, is in itself, a political maneuver. Making her righteous indignation as disappointing as it is transparent.

I'm not impressed.

Hooters...

2008-02-20T18:04:00.000-08:00

I danced with the Hooter girls last night.

I was sitting in Hooters drinking and watching the South Korea v. North Korea football game with some new (very fun) friends. As usual, the Hooter girls start dancing. I laughed with my pals since I recognized the song as one I danced to in my exercise class back in the States.

Then, out of nowhere, one of the Hooter girls came over and grabbed my hand, pulling (and persuading) me to go dance with them. (I still don't know what I did to attract her attention!) My friends just about fell out of their chairs Iaughing while I danced in front of the whole restaurant with the Hooter girls. However, I have to say... I knew all the steps! I guess, if this whole "teacher" thing doesn't work out, at least I know I have a fall back option.

Other fun news....

I was in a pub yesterday afternoon, drinking a beer and practicing my Korean letters. (I still get some of the last letters of the alphabet wrong.) One of the Korean bartenders asked me if I knew how to read Korean. When I explain that I was just learning, he asked if he could help me. To make a long story short, I had two of the Korean bartenders quizzing me on my letters and helping me read words from the newspaper. Very cool!

I'm never coming home. This is just too much fun.

Too much good news for one day...

2008-02-18T21:46:00.000-08:00

THE OFFICE IS RETURNING!
April 10, 2008

Toby. Oscar. Jim. Pam. Dwight. Angela. Darrel. Michael. Jan. Ryan.

Oh, how I miss them!

What goes around comes around...

2008-02-18T01:55:00.000-08:00

In high school I hated science class. It was my first class of the day and I was always late. Sometimes I would just find something else to do so I wouldn't have to go... Leadership. Debate. Student government. My friend and I would sometimes go to Noah's Bagels and get chocolate chip bagels. ANYTHING so that we could miss the boring class. And after nine years I thought I got away with it... But, I was wrong!

What is my latest class assignment at my hagwon.... Earth Science!

Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor?

Here are a few questions I now have to answer and then explain to my new science students...

1. Two cities are separated by 300 miles. City X has a temperature of 42 degrees Fahrenheit and city Y has a temperature of 60 degrees Fahrenheit. Calculate the temperature gradient between the two cities.

2. Name the major layers of the Earth and their functions.

3. Erosion typically wears the Hawaiian volcano Mono Loa down about 20cm in 5 years. Lava flows build the volcano up about 10cm every time there is an eruption. Mono Loa erupts about once every two years. Is the volcano growing or wearing down?

This class is a disaster waiting to happen!

6am...

2008-02-16T00:18:00.000-08:00

I got off work at 10:00.
I met up with my friends at 11:00.
I was dancing by 12:00.
I stopped dancing at 6:00.

The Koreans in the club can't speak English. But they sing every word of "In Da Club."

This is very fun.

Bribes...

2008-02-15T04:26:00.000-08:00

In order to get my kids to finish their in-class essay assignment I promised them that we would do two in-class debates next week.

How cool is that? My kids like debate so much that in order to get them to do more work... I only have to promise them more debate!

These kids are my favorite! Favorite!

Valentine's Day...

2008-02-15T00:47:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day!

Korea celebrates Valentine's Day, but with about 1/8 the intensity of the United States. There are hearts and chocolate, but the stores don't turn into pink and red vortexes, sucking you in and forcing you to buy stuffed bears and wilted flowers. Instead, a few days before V-day candy displays become slightly more prominent and bakery windows seem to showcase significantly more chocolate.

But, there are no valentines and candy hearts passed out at schools. No expensive flowers on desks. There are no sexy women in store windows beckoning men to buy uncomfortable lingerie in the hopes their significant other will actually turn into Gisele Bundchen once they (figure out how to) put it on.

It is just a nice holiday. A day when I got a great e-card Valentine from my Dad (which made my whole day!) and treated myself to an ice cream cone on my way home from work.

Onto other observations...

I may have mentioned this before, but there is something incredibly fascinating about the confidence I've gained while in Korea. There are a variety of factors which have led to my increased sense of empowerment, so let me throw out a few random, loosely related thoughts...

1. I don't have to try to be unique.
In high school and college I used to wear thick black rimmed "emo" glasses for fun. I loved them. I used to call them my "thunder glasses." However, I had perfect vision and didn't need glasses. I just liked being different. And even in moving to South Korea... I wanted to be different. Simply spending three months touring Europe or rushing right off to a corporate job after graduation would be too stereotypical. I'd be just like every other 20-something college graduate. The desire to be different often plays a significant (something too significant) role in my decision making calculus. Often serving as both my greatest strength and weakness. But, here in Korea, I am already different. Korea is one of the most homogenous regions in the world with about 1% foreigners. I am different than 99% of the population without even trying. I can hardly describe how radical and empowering it is to feel wholly unique without having to make any effort.

2. I don't have a peer group.
I exist in a place without other women who look like me. When I open magazines, turn on the television, walk down the street or observe models in store windows... I don't see women who look like me. And I am amazed by how comfortable I feel.

In the United States there is a general consensus that women can be vicious and competitive with one another. (Just watching how women interact in American bars or dance clubs would be enough to substantiate my claim.) But, I live in a place where I don't feel threatened or even competitive. I wear jeans and my favorite Converse tennis shoes to the bar and out dancing. (And I go home without any blisters!) I don't feel the need to be skinnier, sexier or more seductive than the other women. I'm just out to have a good time. And I do! In fact, I spoke with another foreigner here who made a similar observation. A Muslim woman commented that she feels totally comfortable wearing her hijab at the bars and clubs because she doesn't feel judged. And when surrounded by people who feel comfortable with themselves it creates a new type of peer group and pressure. But, that is the type of group I'm willing to join.

Onto other news...

I met a really cool group of people a couple nights ago. I'm going to hang out with them again tonight and on Saturday. How cool! In fact, that wasn’t my only interesting experience. On my way to meet this group, I ran into another guy on the subway. He thought I looked lost (I probably did) and he asked if he could help me find the train. We chatted for a few minutes, exchanges numbers and he's going to email me some cool websites. He wasn’t hitting on me, just helping me out. How often does that happen in the US?

And finally, I've saved the very best for last....
My (not-so) little brother turns 21 on Feb 17th. I won't be there. I think that might be the most disappointing part of my entire trip to Korea. Nonetheless... He is the coolest brother anyone could ask for and I am so glad he has great friends who will take good care of him. Happy Birthday Mike! I love you very very much.

In honor of Mike's birthday I am posting one of my all-time favorite pictures of the two of us...

(P.S. Mike, if you are reading this... I wanted to post the picture Mom took of the two of us from back in high school when you are giving me a piggy-back ride out in the back yard. You know the one I'm talking about, right? I just can't find it on my laptop. It is my all-time favorite pictures of the two of us!)

Miserable...

2008-02-11T15:53:00.000-08:00

http://promo.realestate.yahoo.com/americas-most-miserable-cities.html

That's right... Stockton beat Flint, Michigan!

Who could possibly wonder why I am glad I moved to South Korea?

South Gate...

2008-02-11T08:30:00.000-08:00

I was there three days ago.
This is a tragedy.

The Guardian
Feb 11, 2008
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/feb/11/heritage

South Koreans mourned the loss of the country's most important cultural monument today after a fire devastated the 610 year old Namdaemun gate in the heart of Seoul.

Police suspect arson or faulty wiring could be to blame for the blaze, which turned the structure's magnificent wooden roof into a pile of smoking ashes.

Namdaemun, or Great South Gate, is designated as the state's number one national treasure. Dating back to the Joseon Dynasty (1392-1910), it is the oldest wooden structure in a capital and plays a central role in South Korea's cultural identity.

"People's hearts will ache," said president-elect Lee Myung-bak on a visit to the scene earlier today.

The culture ministry said the gate was one of the few links to Korea's heritage left in the capital city.

The loss of one of the few remaining ancient buildings in the concrete metropolis has prompted a bout of soul searching, with most of the initial criticism directed at firefighters.

According to the local media, the fire broke out on Sunday night and at one point appeared to be controlled by the 360 firemen who were hosing down the outside of the buildings.

But the firemen were so cautious about damaging the structure that they did not hack their way inside to extinguish the source of the blaze. It roared back out of control and after five hours, the ancient roof collapsed.

"Without doubt the fire could have been controlled in the early stage," said Professor Lee Su-kyung of Seoul National University of Technology, told the Reuters news agency. "Someone could have gone inside the structure. I just don't understand."

Investigators are looking into a witness description of a middle-aged man who reportedly climbed the stairs of Namdaemun with a shopping bag, ignited a spark, and then departed the scene as the fire took hold.

Firefighters found two disposable lighters at the origin of the fire, Yonhap news agency reported. But police have not found any closed circuit TV footage that shows a suspect in the vicinity at the time.

Kim Young-soo, head of the central Seoul police station, said an electrical fire had not been ruled out.

"We should investigate by considering all possibilities," he told reporters.

If arson if proved, it will raise questions about security. The gate, which was closed to the public for almost a century, was opened up in 2006.

Culture officials said the loss of the gate - which was built in 1398 as the main southern entrance of what was then a walled city - would be temporary. They believe it can be reconstructed using measurements made two years ago.

Rebuilding the structure with new materials will take at least three years and cost about 20 billion won (£10.8m), the Cultural Heritage Administration said.

Moments Like These...

2008-02-10T08:44:00.000-08:00

"Isn't that the real secret? The simplest truth? Isn't that what the gurus and wise ones have been saying since before Jesus was a tingle in the loins of God? To be so present, so hotly, divinely connected to the moment you are in that time loses all relevance and age means nothing and opportunity shows up exactly as it should, and the real accomplishment, the real sense of achievement comes from celebrating each and every breath like it was a shot glass of molten meaning?

Yes. I'm going with that."

- Mark Morford

I'm starting to feel a bit... Hmm? I don't know the word. I think the word "lonely" would work, but it just doesn't quite convey the right emotion. I need a word that explains how it feels to be surrounded by people I hardly know. Nice people, but new people. Isolated... Maybe that is a better word.

Lucky for me, reading Morford's radical and poetic columns can be quite soothing in moments like these.

Mary Oliver...

2008-02-08T06:45:00.000-08:00

"Still, what I want in my life
is to be willing to be dazzled--
to cast aside the weight of facts

and maybe even
to float a little
above this difficult world.
I want to believe I am looking

into the white fire of a great mystery."
- Mary Oliver

Attempting to Learn Korean...

2008-02-03T21:39:00.001-08:00

Having completed my second day of Korean class I am now downgrading my learning classification from "Learning Korean" to "Attempting to Learn Korean."

It is not a pretty sight!

But, when I left my class and walked home I started trying to read words. I didn't know what any of them meant, but I just kept trying to remember the sounds. And despite my complete inability to remember what this letter "ㅊ" or "ㅈ" (or about a dozen others) sounds like... I'm hanging in there!

If you want to get an idea of the new letters I am learning, you can play around with this online game.

http://www.genkienglish.net/speakkorean/koreanalphabet.htm

A few more details about my new class and new routine. My Korean class is from 10:00-12:00 everyday. In order to get to the class I have to walk eight minutes to the subway station. Ride the subway four minutes to Gangnam Station which is two stops away. I then have to walk four more minutes to the class. It costs me 1,800\ for the entire trip, about $2.00. (If I wanted to take a taxi it would cost me about 2,500\, not even $3.00. But, I like to walk.) Afterward, since my work starts at 2:00, I can stop and eat lunch at a little Korean restaurant near my school and get an entire meal for 4,000\, about $4.00. And, of course, I can study my Korean letters and words while I walk and eat. (In fact, I can study Korean just about everywhere... I'm in Korea!)

It is a nice routine.

Funny thing happened today. I was on the subway and an old man got up from his seat to stand next to me. He started asking me questions in broken English. He then pulled out a book from his pocket "Speed English for Beginners." He was trying to practice his English by talking with me. I've heard that it happens a lot, but this was a first for me. The best part was that I had him help me remember some of the Korean letters. I just pointed to a sign and had him say the word. It was a fair trade.

This morning I didn't want to wake up. Drinking last night (and the night before) was an unwise decision. But, I pulled myself out of bed and got ready for class. On my way to the subway station I was cold, the wind was blowing and I realized that I’d forgotten to re-charge my ipod. I was in an unpleasant mood. Then it occurred to me…I live in Seoul, an unbelievably cool city, and all I have to do to stay here is to go to work and talk about debate all day.

It's hard to maintain a foul mood when things are working out so well.

Debate rocks.
Korea rocks.
I rock.

Learning Korean...

2008-02-02T20:51:00.001-08:00

I'm learning Korean.

I started on Saturday morning. I woke up early, hopped on the subway and attended my first Korean language class at the Seoul Foreign Language Academy. I started with a private lesson and will be joining the group lessons on Monday.

I studied for two hours and the entire time I was delighted. Absolutely tickled! I tried to make new sounds with my mouth and remember the new sounds when I saw the letters written on the chalkboard. Every now and then my teacher (who spoke a minimal amount of English) would tell me that I had accidentally just said a word. I got very good at saying "cucumber" but couldn't seem to recognize the difference between "coffee" and "nosebleed." (The actual Korean translation is "nose blood" so I'm going to be sure to practice those words before I accidentally ask for a cup of nose blood next time I'm in Starbucks!)

By the end of class I was exhausted. It was a totally new type of learning. Imagine learning Spanish, Italian or French. The letters look similar to English and even most of the sounds are the same. But, learning Korean requires you to start from scratch! It's like learning to write your ABC's all over again.

Nonetheless, when I walked out of my class I felt fantastic. I looked at the Korean words on the street signs. Of course, I only recognized three letters, but (let me repeat) I RECOGNIZED THREE WHOLE LETTERS! I felt so triumphant that I could have danced down the street!

In fact, David Brent seems to demonstrate exactly how I felt after my Korean class...

More good news... February 7th is the Korean Lunar New Year. According to wikipedia (so it must be true)...

"It is the most important of the traditional Korean holidays. It consists of a period of celebrations, starting on New Year's Day. The Korean New Year holidays lasts three days, and is considered a more important holiday than the solar New Year's Day."

I have to admit, the real reason the Korean New Year is important to me is because I get three days off from work! I'm planning on traveling to Busan. Busan is a coastal city on the opposite side of the country. But, since Korea is so small I can get there by train in about 3 hours. It might be a good time to visit.

Also, Seoul has a world class art museum. Seoul Museum of Art (SEMA). They are featuring a Van Gogh exhibit and it would be a shame to miss it.

Well, I had better be off. I have homework for my Korean class tomorrow and classes in a few minutes.

Movie Star...

2008-02-01T03:36:00.000-08:00

I could never be a movie star.

It's not that I don't have the looks, the brains, the body, the charm or the talent. (Obviously I do!)

It's that I can't stand the sound of my own voice on camera. It might as well be a thousand fingernails scraping a chalkboard!

At the hagwon we record all of the students' speeches and debates. As a natural result, the teacher's voice can be heard giving feedback or asking questions in between speeches. So, every time I go back to review the material and write evaluations for the my students I hear my wretched squawking from behind the camera and think to myself, "Those poor students... They have to listen to that whiney voice! Ack!"

As a result I've decided to start speaking in a sexy, husky voice. Maybe that will solve the problem...

(And then I really can be a movie star!)

Karaoke Machine...

2008-01-30T22:16:00.000-08:00

I am a karaoke machine.

Last night I finally went to "The Bar" or as my friends like to call it "The Shit Hole." It's the regular hangout and it was everything I thought it would be.

Drinking. Dancing. Bartending. Meeting strangers. Very good times.

Afterward we finally went to a karaoke bar. But, these places are unlike any karaoke bar in the US. Instead, each group gets their own private room with a couple microphones and a bunch of tambourines. Everyone sings and dances to their own songs. It was too much fun for just one person. And the best part is that these places are open so late (5am) so you can sing until your voice gives out.

Other awesome things that are happening...

I got a new digital camera at the Yongsun Electronic Market. I have not been able to stop taking pictures. I'd been here over a month and not taken a single picture. I think some of my friends were starting to think that I didn't actually move to Korea. I just moved to someplace embarrassing and boring like North Dakota. But, now that I have pictures I can finally start documenting my experiences and prove that I fled the country. I love my new camera!

I finally had real Korean BBQ. I've had stew-type beef and peppers, but this time it was real BBQ and it was delicious. Easily the best food I've had since I've been here. The way the BBQ works is that there is a grill in the center of the table and the servers place hot coals under the grill. You have a plate of raw, marinated beef and you cook your own meat. Then you wrap of the pieces of meat in big pieces of lettuce with rice, sprouts, onion, tofu and pepper sauce. It is truly fantastic.

Oh... I haven't written about chopsticks! Koreans use chopsticks for everything, but their chopsticks are flat. So, instead of round or square Chinese and Japanese chopsticks, the Korean chopsticks are mostly flat long pieces of metal. You might not think they make that much of a difference, but you'd be wrong. Those are some slippery chopsticks!

No one uses voicemail. People just text message constantly.

I visited Dongdaemun yesterday. It is an area of town with huge shopping centers. I browsed through the clothes and had to laugh. They are so fashion conscious here and the outfits sometimes defy logic. But, I'm starting to get into the new styles. A lot of people wear turtlenecks and then layer with a loose, tunic-type, jumper thing. I bought one yesterday and am wearing it as I write this. I think I look a little goofy, but I'm comfortable and I guess I am "in style." But, since I don't understand Korean, for all I know everyone is laughing at the stupid white girl's clothes.

Finally, I've got pretty cool co-workers. They are a good time, every time. Lucky me.

Listen Up...

2008-01-23T10:17:00.000-08:00

Go listen to the song "Life Is Short" by Butterfly Boucher.

It played on my ipod today while I was standing in the middle of a crowded subway car.

For a few minutes I felt like I had my own personal soundtrack.

Super Junior...

2008-01-21T21:46:00.000-08:00

All the kids here (especially the girls) are crazy about Super Junior... the Korean equivalent of the Backstreet Boys/N'sync. The girls doodle their names on their textbooks, sing their songs in class and never stop thinking about this band.

For your viewing pleasure... Super Junior!

P.S. All the members of this band are men. You'll be glad I clarified... Trust me.

One Month...

2008-01-21T08:19:00.000-08:00

I have been in Korea for one month.

Eleven more to go.

S-O-J-U...

2008-01-20T20:59:00.000-08:00

I heard a Korean rap song the other day and the only part of the song I could understand was "S-O-J-U." Just like American rappers who are "sippin' on gin and juice" and who have made the realization that "Bacardi" rhymes with "party," the Korean rappers sing the praises of their national drink of choice... Soju.

I finally got around to giving this stuff a try... Good times. I don't think I'm a big fan of straight soju, but mixed with pineapple juice, kiwi juice or peach juice... I could drink the stuff all night. The bar/restaurant where I went with some new friends served a pitcher of juice with a bottle of soju. You'd pour the bottle into the pitcher and mix the drink at your table. Then fill everyone's shot glasses.

In Korea it is rude to fill your own glass, so your friends are always pouring your drinks and you are always pouring theirs. It seems a bit inconvenient and I seem to accidentally break the rule a lot, but I'm trying to be a little more patient and not so imperialistic.

At the end of our soju drinking the whole crowd stumbled over to the 7-11. (There is a 7-11 every four blocks... no joke!) I was advised to try the "Hangover Cure." A little $5 can of slightly gross, molasses/coffee-ish drink that was suppose to prevent hangovers. I don't know if it did the trick or if it was the fact that I didn't have to work till 2:00 in the afternoon the next day... But, I was hangover free the next morning!

In other news... UOP is still a pain in the ass.

Moving on... Last night I went with one of my co-workers to a little Mexican restaurant after work. (I won't claim that it was the best Mexican I have ever had, after all I am from Stockton, California... home to some pretty authentic and delicious Mexican food!) Unfortunately, the restaurant was closing so we had to get our food to-go. So, we hopped in a cab and took our meal to the E-mart where we could sit and eat. After digging into our food, one of the workers at the store came over to our table and told us we had to leave.... Our food was too smelly! Let me remind you that I live in the land of Kimchi! They use garlic and hot peppers in every dish. Uncooked fish is a frequent component of Korean dishes.... But, Mexican food was too much. I just had to laugh. It only seems fair... Their food frequently smells awful to me and they feel the same way about my food! We really are more similar than we are different.

Other good news...

I found the E-mart. Actually, that is a bit of an overstatement... My friend took me to the E-mart. But, I know where it is now and I can shop there. It is like a giant Target with a real grocery store. I have been shopping in little markets, but now I know where I can stock up.

Despite it's size and volume of products, E-mart doesn't have deodorant. Seriously.

I don't have a car and it is great. No car payments. No car insurance payments. No parking. No waiting to get gas. No paying for gas.

I don't have a backpack and it is not great. I need to get one... yesterday! Since I'm always walking, I need to get a big backpack for when I go grocery shopping or to the gym. Not to mention, it is just more eco-friendly. People are always bringing their own grocery bags with them to the markets.

My Korean lessons start on January 31st... 10 days! I'm going to start practicing the Korean alphabet before I start the lessons. The history of the Korean language is really interesting. I'll have more updates on that in the coming days.

All is well. It's snowing. But, I'm safe and warm.

Work it out...

2008-01-14T21:07:00.000-08:00

I joined a gym... and it is a really cool gym.

Most the buildings in the area where I live are multiple stories and house multiple businesses. It is no different with my gym. On the first floor there is a restaurant. The second floor is home to a super fashionable hair stylist. The third floor houses an internal medicine clinic. And the fourth through sixth floors are the gym. I was surprised when I took a tour to see that every person was wearing the exact same outfit. It turns out that the gym actually provides clean workout outfits for all the members in the locker room. Similar to the way some gyms provide towels in the locker rooms. Awesome! Which means the only things I need to bring to the gym are my shoes, socks and ipod. Actually... they also provide a personal set of headphones. So, I don't even need my ipod! Perfect!

However, the best part of the gym has to be the showers. Hot hot showers! I actually took my first truly hot shower in Korea just yesterday. The water in my apartment gets luke warm (at best) and makes showering miserable. But, not anymore. I can take scalding hot showers at the gym anytime I like. I may never take a shower in my apartment again!

Moving on... I had a really great experience in class today. Emma, a female student who is shy, quiet, timid and usually stares at me blankly when I ask a question, really surprised me today. Emma is one of the students in my beginning debate class and at the end of every class she has to give a speech. Most times, despite all my encouragement and reminders, she speaks at a volume that is impossible to comprehend. I can only tell that she is speaking because I see her lips moving. But, today I heard her! She spoke loud enough (just barely) for me to hear her! And she made a great argument. Of course, the vocabulary she used was rudimentary. She left out articles from her sentences and she confused some past and present tenses... But, the idea was there. She was making the right comparison between debate arguments. She did it! All by herself, at the podium, in front of the class... She did it! I wanted to jump out of my seat and cheer.

A few other interesting (and random) things worth mentioning...

Pedestrians have no rights in Seoul. Cars park on the streets. Motorcyclists wiz in and out of crowds delivering every kind of food and product imaginable. I can't count the number of times I've been almost maimed or killed on my way to work.

I feel like I've really moved to Korea when I clean my apartment. No one cleans their hotel room on vacation. No one does laundry when they take a trip. So, when I clean and fold laundry I remember that I am here to stay.

People are nicer than we give them credit for.

I am never donating any money to my alma mater. (When I'm rich and famous I may set up a scholarship fund for the debate team... But, not a cent for that stupid school.)

I adore Mark Morford. Every time I read his columns I fall in love all over again. (www.sfgate.com)

I have never had more respect for my high school teachers than I do now.

Payday...

2008-01-09T20:57:00.000-08:00

Today is the big day... My first payday. I opened a Korean bank account and money should appear in my account by the end of the day. How exciting!

Speaking of being paid... I was paid an incredibly encouraging compliment yesterday. One of the Korean teachers at my school said she was surprised I'd never been to Korea before because I seemed so comfortable in my new surroundings. How nice! I guess the old saying is true "Fake it 'till you make it."

But, I suspect my comfort has less to do with me and more to do with the helpfulness of the people I have met. I have new friends who volunteer to write out instructions in Korean so that I can ask for help at the grocery store or when trying to communicate with a cab driver. Other teachers have given me hints on how to get my thermostat to work properly, how to recognize Korean words, the best way to hail a taxi, and have shown me how to use the subway. The list goes on to include people truly going out of the their way to help me get started in Korea. And those are just the people who can speak English!

The overwhelming kindness from people who don't speak English is incredibly surprising. After all, I'm a foreigner in their country and I don't speak their language. I'm the one being difficult and creating communication challenges. Just yesterday I was at the grocery store and I tried to use the Korean word for thank you/goodbye. I mangled the word and the grocery clerk helped me pronounce it correctly. He was kind and generous when he didn't have to be. Other Koreans have practically engaged in games of Charades with me in order to communicate and help me find my way.

I'm really loving it here and I am blessed beyond measure.

Two Weeks in Review...

2008-01-07T00:31:00.000-08:00

Over the past few weeks I've been sending emails, keeping journals and jotting notes to myself. Here is a brief collection of some of those writings... just to get caught up on my first 14 days in South Korea.

Saturday 12.22.07
Notes on an airport bar napkin

Sitting at the airport bar. I order a glass of champagne and watch the planes take-off. At this time tomorrow I'll be living in South Korea.... The weeks have wound me up and filled me with anxiety, but now I just have to get on a plane. I'm moving to Korea.

Sunday 12.23.07
Email to family

I'm here. I did it. I arrived late last night.

This morning I woke up at 6:00am. I got dressed and just started exploring. It was still dark outside, but I was awake and there was no reason for me to stay in my dorm room of an apartment. I put on good walking shoes, bundled up and just set out to see if I could find my school. An hour later... I still hadn't found my school. The school is about a 3 minute drive from my apartment and I have a pretty good idea of where it is, but I just haven't found it yet.

But, in the mean time I fed myself, found my way back to my apartment and even figured out the nearest subway station. I used the correct bills to pay for breakfast. I remembered the code to get back into my building and found an internet cafe. And I am writing you this email... I think I deserve a shiny trophy.

Monday 12.24.07
Facebook post

It is Christmas Eve.
There is no tree.
There are no presents.
There is no eggnog.

I sat on fluffy pillows, ate delicious Moroccan food and smoked hookah with a couple guys from Saudi Arabia, Sudan and Dubai. We all danced for hours in a hot smokey basement club with Korean girls who could only say "Merry Christmas" in English. I drank beer from three different countries. I smoked an awful cigar. And while eating dinner four different languages were being used at the table.

It is a very very merry Christmas!

Thursday 12.27.07
Email to family

Someone called me 'Miss Jacki' today.
I'm a teacher.

Sunday 12.30.07
Facebook post

It snowed.
I walked home while it was snowing.
Snow flakes actually landed on my nose and my eye lashes.
I live someplace where it snows.

In California I'd be wearing flip flops. But, in Korea I am making fresh footprints in the snow. It feels like I am in a movie.

On an even more exciting note... I ate Korean food for the first time last night! Some noodles and chicken and peppers thing. (And a second time for lunch today.) It was really good... I am going to like it here.

Wednesday 1.2.07
Journal Entry

I have never walked so much in my entire life. I need better walking shoes. Sylish, cool walking shoes. I love walking.

Monday 1.7.08
Email to friend

This morning it occurred to me that I am not scared of anything. I know how to deal with all my co-workers (who are fantastic). I know how to deal with my boss if he asks me to work hours I don't want to work. I can get just about anything I need in the city. I know how to use the subway. If I get lost, I may not know how to get home, but I know how to get to places where I know how to get home. I'm good at my job and I am safe. Not bad for having been here only two weeks.

And so it begins...

2008-01-06T23:10:00.000-08:00

This is my cliche.
A traveler's blog, complete with a not-so-clever, pun intended title.

As with any new endeavor, the intent is to be exceptional. In this case, to compile prose that is thoughtful, articulate and insightful. That will inspire and showcase personal achievement, experience and growth.

But, the moments and thoughts of my life rarely merit the aforementioned adjectives. Instead a more accurate description would include phrases such as "routinely incomplete" "unpredictable" "grammatically incorrect" and might even occasionally include the thoroughly unimpressive label, "sophomoric."

But, my experiences and thoughts are wholly my own. And so, the only thing this cliche of a blog can guarantee is a completely authentic compilation of the radically new and thrilling experiencing that are confronting me at every turn.

And that will simply have to be enough.

So begins... Jacki's Adventures of the Seoul.