Slate...

Why I Can't Vote for John McCain
I admire the man, but his party has been taken over by anti-intellectual extremists.
By Anne Applebaum
Monday, Oct. 27, 2008

This weekend, while reading the latest polling data on John McCain, Sarah Palin, and their appeal—or growing lack of it—among "independent women voters," it suddenly dawned on me: I am, in fact, one of these elusive independent woman voters, and I have the credentials to prove it. For the last couple of decades, I've sometimes voted Democratic, sometimes Republican. I'm even a registered independent, though I did think of switching to the Republican Party to vote for John McCain in 2000. But because the last political party I truly felt comfortable with was Margaret Thatcher's Conservative Party (I lived in England in the 1980s and '90s), I didn't actually do it.

The larger point, though, is that if I'm not voting for McCain—and, after a long struggle, I've realized that I'm not—maybe it's worth explaining why, because I suspect there are other independent voters who feel the same way. It's not his campaign, disjointed though that's been, that finally repulses me; it's his rapidly deteriorating, increasingly anti-intellectual, no longer even recognizably conservative Republican Party. His problems are not technical, to do with ads, fund raising, and tactics, as some have suggested. They are institutional, to do with his colleagues, his advisers, and his supporters.

I should say here that I know McCain slightly: He spoke at a party given for a book I wrote a few years ago, though I think that was as much because of the subject (Communist prison camps) as the author. But it's not his personality I admire most. Far more important is his knowledge of foreign affairs, an understanding that goes well beyond an ability to guess correctly the name of the Pakistani president. McCain not only knows the names; he knows the people—and by this I mean not just foreign presidents but foreign members of parliament, journalists, generals. He goes to Germany every year, visits Vietnam often, can talk intelligently about Belarus and Uzbekistan. I've heard him do it. Let's just say that's one of the things that distinguished him, for me, from our current president, who once confessed that "this foreign-policy stuff is a little frustrating."

The second thing I liked about McCain was the deliberate distance he always kept from the nuttier wing of his party and, simultaneously, the loyalty he's shown to a recognizably conservative budgetary philosophy, something that many congressional Republicans abandoned long ago. Fiscal conservatism, balanced budgets, sober spending—all these principles have been brushed away as so much nonsense for the last eight years by Republicans more interested in grandstanding about how much they hate Washington. McCain was one of the few to keep talking about these principles. He was also one of shockingly few to understand that there is nothing American, let alone conservative, about torture and that a battle for civilized values could not be won by uncivilized means.

Finally, I admired McCain's willingness to tackle politically risky issues like immigration, the debate about which has long been drenched in hypocrisy. Those who want to ban it are illogically denying both the role that immigrants, especially the millions of illegal immigrants, already play in the American economy, as well as the improbability of forced deportations; those who want to allow it without restriction don't acknowledge the security risks. McCain tried to put together a bipartisan coalition in an effort to find a rational solution. He failed—blocked by the ideologues in his party.

But if these traits appealed to me, I'm guessing they would have appealed to other independents, too. Why, then, has McCain spent the last four months running away from them? The appointment of Sarah Palin—inspired by his closest colleagues—turned out not to be a "maverick" move but, rather, a concession to those Republicans who think foreign policy can be conducted using a series of clichés and those in his party who shout down the federal government while quietly raking in federal subsidies. Though McCain has the one of the best records of bipartisanship in the Senate, he has let his campaign appeal to his party's extremes. Though he is a true foreign-policy intellectual, his supporters cultivate ignorance and fear: Watch Sean Hannity's "Obama & Friends: History of Radicalism" if you don't believe me. Worse, in a fatal effort to appeal to the least thoughtful, most partisan elements of his base, McCain has moved away from his previous positions on torture and immigration. Maybe that's all tactics, and maybe the "real" McCain will ditch the awful ideologues after Nov. 4 if, by some miracle, he happens to win. But how can I know that will happen?

Here's what I do know: I would give anything to rewrite history and make McCain president in 2000. But in 2008, I don't think I can vote for him. Barack Obama is indeed the least experienced, least tested candidate in modern presidential history. But at least if he wins, I can be sure that the mobs who cry "terrorist" at the sound of his name will be kept away—far away—from the White House.

Rollin' On...

Well, I seem to be on a roll with these blog updates. And I don't want to stop now.

First, a quick shout out to Duane and Kat who apparently both read this blog on occasion, bringing my readership up to a cool half dozen.

As for other things on my mind...

I have a penpal in Ireland that I have written to for over a year and a half. We met for nine hours on April 2nd, 2007. He recommended three books, one of which was sitting on my nightstand at home. As we drank he was crass, arrogant and intellectually curious. An excellent combination. We started emailing the very next day. We now have over 700 emails between us... Averaging more than one email a day for over 550 days. And about four weeks ago I stopped writing. I don't really know why. I continue to care deeply about the person, but I just stopped. Nothing dramatic or final, I just couldn't conjure words to type. He didn't wonder where I was or what happened, because maybe it just seemed natural that we would eventually flicker and then fade. I often consider him to have been the light to my fuse, resulting in a series of violent and positive explosions that rattled my once a mundane life... But, something seems lost. I wish I knew what it was. Maybe then it would be easier to find again.

In other news... Thailand. Wow. I am looking forward to Thailand in three weeks. I think I included it in the last post, but I have plans to pet tigers and ride elephants. I'm going to be in Bangkok during the full moon so I'll be going dancing on the beach at a full moon party that draws 10,000 people every month. I'll spend a few afternoons laying on the beach, letting my pale skin blind the other beach-goers while I drink potent concoctions. Mmmm... I want to leave today.

But, since I can't leave today I'll have to rely upon my kindergarten students to tide me over. Today, one of the little girls pulled my arm so that I would crouch down to her height. She wrapped her arms around my head and pulled my ear close so that she could whisper, "I love Jacki Teacher." And not to be outdone, while I was already hunched on the floor, Mike wanted to smell my hair and give me a hug while Chris wanted to give me a dozen kisses on my face, head and elbow.

What constantly amazes me about my little kids is just how little they are. They are the tiniest, littlest people with totally unpredictable minds. They can cause incredible amounts of damage when their energy is focused, but if someone takes the pink crayon their world collapses. Mike started crying in class today for an unknown reason. I was reading a story to the class and he just broke into tears. I looked over to see what was wrong and reached my hand toward him. That was encouragement enough, because he crawled across the floor and sat in my lap. He just curled into a ball on my lap, held onto my sweater and watched me turn the pages of the book while the tears dried on his cheek. I was astonished at how loud and disruptive his wails could be and then how tiny he was on my lap. Like a small tornado that suddenly calms.

Graduate school apps are due within the next three-five weeks. I am working frantically and I hate it. I'd forgotten how ridiculous these can be, especially when all the materials I need are 6000 miles away. I have to mail letters of recommendation forms back to professors that are on the other side of the planet and then get them sent back to me. BUT, I am moving apartments and jobs so the address I can use to have the letters sent back keeps changing! It is enough to make a girl lose sleep at night... In fact, I should be sleeping right now, but I am blogging in order to avoid working on the apps and therefore losing more sleep! What a vicious circle.

Alright... Here is the plan. Stop blogging. Go jogging. Use the adrenaline from jogging to power through another school's application.

Ready. Set. Go.

Yes, sir...

Breaks Over...

Aaron Sorkin Conjures a Meeting of Obama and Bartlet
By MAUREEN DOWD

Now that he’s finally fired up on the soup-line economy, Barack Obama knows he can’t fade out again. He was eager to talk privately to a Democratic ex-president who could offer more fatherly wisdom — not to mention a surreptitious smoke — and less fraternal rivalry. I called the “West Wing” creator Aaron Sorkin (yes, truly) to get a read-out of the meeting. This is what he wrote:

BARACK OBAMA knocks on the front door of a 300-year-old New Hampshire farmhouse while his Secret Service detail waits in the driveway. The door opens and OBAMA is standing face to face with former President JED BARTLET.

BARTLET Senator.

OBAMA Mr. President.

BARTLET You seem startled.

OBAMA I didn’t expect you to answer the door yourself.

BARTLET I didn’t expect you to be getting beat by John McCain and a Lancôme rep who thinks “The Flintstones” was based on a true story, so let’s call it even.

OBAMA Yes, sir.

BARTLET Come on in.

BARTLET leads OBAMA into his study.

BARTLET That was a hell of a convention.

OBAMA Thank you, I was proud of it.

BARTLET I meant the Republicans. The Us versus Them-a-thon. As a Democrat I was surprised to learn that I don’t like small towns, God, people with jobs or America. I’ve been a little out of touch but is there a mandate that the vice president be skilled at field dressing a moose —

OBAMA Look —

BARTLET — and selling Air Force Two on eBay?

OBAMA Joke all you want, Mr. President, but it worked.

BARTLET Imagine my surprise. What can I do for you, kid?

OBAMA I’m interested in your advice.

BARTLET I can’t give it to you.

OBAMA Why not?

BARTLET I’m supporting McCain.

OBAMA Why?

BARTLET He’s promised to eradicate evil and that was always on my “to do” list.

OBAMA O.K. —

BARTLET And he’s surrounded himself, I think, with the best possible team to get us out of an economic crisis. Why, Sarah Palin just said Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac had “gotten too big and too expensive to the taxpayers.” Can you spot the error in that statement?

OBAMA Yes, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac aren’t funded by taxpayers.

BARTLET Well, at least they are now. Kind of reminds you of the time Bush said that Social Security wasn’t a government program. He was only off by a little — Social Security is the largest government program.

OBAMA I appreciate your sense of humor, sir, but I really could use your advice.

BARTLET Well, it seems to me your problem is a lot like the problem I had twice.

OBAMA Which was?

BARTLET A huge number of Americans thought I thought I was superior to them.

OBAMA And?

BARTLET I was.

OBAMA I mean, how did you overcome that?

BARTLET I won’t lie to you, being fictional was a big advantage.

OBAMA What do you mean?

BARTLET I’m a fictional president. You’re dreaming right now, Senator.

OBAMA I’m asleep?

BARTLET Yes, and you’re losing a ton of white women.

OBAMA Yes, sir.

BARTLET I mean tons.

OBAMA I understand.

BARTLET I didn’t even think there were that many white women.

OBAMA I see the numbers, sir. What do they want from me?

BARTLET I’ve been married to a white woman for 40 years and I still don’t know what she wants from me.

OBAMA How did you do it?

BARTLET Well, I say I’m sorry a lot.

OBAMA I don’t mean your marriage, sir. I mean how did you get America on your side?

BARTLET There again, I didn’t have to be president of America, I just had to be president of the people who watched “The West Wing.”

OBAMA That would make it easier.

BARTLET You’d do very well on NBC. Thursday nights in the old “ER” time slot with “30 Rock” as your lead-in, you’d get seven, seven-five in the demo with a 20, 22 share — you’d be selling $450,000 minutes.

OBAMA What the hell does that mean?

BARTLET TV talk. I thought you’d be interested.

OBAMA I’m not. They pivoted off the argument that I was inexperienced to the criticism that I’m — wait for it — the Messiah, who, by the way, was a community organizer. When I speak I try to lead with inspiration and aptitude. How is that a liability?

BARTLET Because the idea of American exceptionalism doesn’t extend to Americans being exceptional. If you excelled academically and are able to casually use 690 SAT words then you might as well have the press shoot video of you giving the finger to the Statue of Liberty while the Dixie Chicks sing the University of the Taliban fight song. The people who want English to be the official language of the United States are uncomfortable with their leaders being fluent in it.

OBAMA You’re saying race doesn’t have anything to do with it?

BARTLET I wouldn’t go that far. Brains made me look arrogant but they make you look uppity. Plus, if you had a black daughter —

OBAMA I have two.

BARTLET — who was 17 and pregnant and unmarried and the father was a teenager hoping to launch a rap career with “Thug Life” inked across his chest, you’d come in fifth behind Bob Barr, Ralph Nader and a ficus.

OBAMA You’re not cheering me up.

BARTLET Is that what you came here for?

OBAMA No, but it wouldn’t kill you.

BARTLET Have you tried doing a two-hour special or a really good Christmas show?

OBAMA Sir —

BARTLET Hang on. Home run. Right here. Is there any chance you could get Michelle pregnant before the fall sweeps?

OBAMA The problem is we can’t appear angry. Bush called us the angry left. Did you see anyone in Denver who was angry?

BARTLET Well ... let me think. ...We went to war against the wrong country, Osama bin Laden just celebrated his seventh anniversary of not being caught either dead or alive, my family’s less safe than it was eight years ago, we’ve lost trillions of dollars, millions of jobs, thousands of lives and we lost an entire city due to bad weather. So, you know ... I’m a little angry.

OBAMA What would you do?

BARTLET GET ANGRIER! Call them liars, because that’s what they are. Sarah Palin didn’t say “thanks but no thanks” to the Bridge to Nowhere. She just said “Thanks.” You were raised by a single mother on food stamps — where does a guy with eight houses who was legacied into Annapolis get off calling you an elitist? And by the way, if you do nothing else, take that word back. Elite is a good word, it means well above average. I’d ask them what their problem is with excellence. While you’re at it, I want the word “patriot” back. McCain can say that the transcendent issue of our time is the spread of Islamic fanaticism or he can choose a running mate who doesn’t know the Bush doctrine from the Monroe Doctrine, but he can’t do both at the same time and call it patriotic. They have to lie — the truth isn’t their friend right now. Get angry. Mock them mercilessly; they’ve earned it. McCain decried agents of intolerance, then chose a running mate who had to ask if she was allowed to ban books from a public library. It’s not bad enough she thinks the planet Earth was created in six days 6,000 years ago complete with a man, a woman and a talking snake, she wants schools to teach the rest of our kids to deny geology, anthropology, archaeology and common sense too? It’s not bad enough she’s forcing her own daughter into a loveless marriage to a teenage hood, she wants the rest of us to guide our daughters in that direction too? It’s not enough that a woman shouldn’t have the right to choose, it should be the law of the land that she has to carry and deliver her rapist’s baby too? I don’t know whether or not Governor Palin has the tenacity of a pit bull, but I know for sure she’s got the qualifications of one. And you’re worried about seeming angry? You could eat their lunch, make them cry and tell their mamas about it and God himself would call it restrained. There are times when you are simply required to be impolite. There are times when condescension is called for!

OBAMA Good to get that off your chest?

BARTLET Am I keeping you from something?

OBAMA Well, it’s not as if I didn’t know all of that and it took you like 20 minutes to say.

BARTLET I know, I have a problem, but admitting it is the first step.

OBAMA What’s the second step?

BARTLET I don’t care.

OBAMA So what about hope? Chuck it for outrage and put-downs?

BARTLET No. You’re elite, you can do both. Four weeks ago you had the best week of your campaign, followed — granted, inexplicably — by the worst week of your campaign. And you’re still in a statistical dead heat. You’re a 47-year-old black man with a foreign-sounding name who went to Harvard and thinks devotion to your country and lapel pins aren’t the same thing and you’re in a statistical tie with a war hero and a Cinemax heroine. To these aged eyes, Senator, that’s what progress looks like. You guys got four debates. Get out of my house and go back to work.

OBAMA Wait, what is it you always used to say? When you hit a bump on the show and your people were down and frustrated? You’d give them a pep talk and then you’d always end it with something. What was it ...?

BARTLET “Break’s over.”

Obama vs. The Gays...

Obama vs. McCain vs. Gay Marriage
In California, the presidential race is taking a back seat to gay marriage.
By Farhad Manjoo
Posted Wednesday, Oct. 15, 2008, at 4:00 PM ET

No one doubts that Barack Obama will win California by a double-digit margin this year. In some northern counties, he may well hit 90 percent. Yet politics in this nonswing blue state still defy prediction. California's 2008 ballot is a thicket of closely contested, closely watched social issues. And on some of the biggest questions, blue voters—in one case, the very same voters that Obama is counting on—look ready to swing red.

Among other state initiatives, Californians will vote on a measure to ban gay marriage; to require parental notification for abortions for minors; and to institute a program of rehabilitation, rather than incarceration, for nonviolent drug offenders. Even the beasts have a stake in the election: Proposition 2 requires that cows, pigs, chickens, and other farm animals "be allowed, for the majority of the day, to fully extend their limbs or wings, lie down, stand up and turn around." (The New York Times has come out in favor of the measure, while a number of local papers, including the Los Angeles Times, oppose it on grounds that it'll damage the state's huge agriculture industry.) In surveys, a large majority of voters say they'll pull the lever in the animals' favor.

But on the question of whether human beings will be allowed to lie down and extend their limbs with whomever they please, Californians are much more uncertain. In 2000, residents voted overwhelmingly to ban same-sex marriage. The state Supreme Court struck down that initiative this spring, saying such a ban required a change to the state constitution, and gay couples up and down the coast have been marrying ever since. Now comes Proposition 8, which would enshrine a ban on same-sex marriage into the California Constitution.

Early polls showed the measure tanking. Liberals were buoyed: Not only were they going to win the White House; they would also see their neighbors repudiate the 2000 vote and embrace an unmistakably libertine (if not strictly "liberal") social policy. But over the last month, proponents of Proposition 8 have pulled in more campaign cash (40 percent of it from Mormons) and launched an aggressive TV ad campaign. Now the anti-gay-marriage measure looks likely to pass. Says Yvette Martinez, political director of No on 8: "I think maybe we got a little complacent."

There's an interesting demographic wrinkle to the debate over Proposition 8. Obama has come out against the measure—but his supporters are another matter. The Democrat is expected to bring a surge of black and Latino voters to the polls on Election Day. This spells trouble for gay marriage; in some surveys (PDF), minority voters have expressed much greater support for banning same-sex marriage than have whites. Chip White, a spokesman for the pro-Proposition 8 campaign, stopped short of saying that Obama's presence on the ballot will help the measure. But he did point out that the campaign plans a big push in minority communities, especially through churches and other religious networks. "Traditional marriage initiatives have historically been supported by African-Americans," he says. "We think this one will be no different."

Martinez of the anti-Proposition 8 campaign, meanwhile, says that her side has also begun to tap minority communities, and several prominent black ministers as well as La Opinión, the large Spanish-language Los Angeles daily, oppose the gay-marriage ban. Still, Martinez concedes, minority voters could be a problem. "We think these communities have to hear our message a little stronger," she says.

Late last month, the Proposition 8 campaign hit on what seems to be its most effective argument against gay marriage: that if the court's ruling stands, kindergartners will be "indoctrinated" into the gay lifestyle. They've pushed the message in a couple of goofily creative TV ads now blanketing the airwaves. The more outrageous spot features a girl who comes home from school to show her mother a book her teacher has given her—King & King, a fairy tale about a young prince who doesn't show much interest in getting together with a princess. "I learned how a prince can marry a prince and I can marry a princess!" the girl in the ad tells her mother. An announcer declares that under California law, schools are required to teach kids about marriage, and that even if parents object, "teaching children about gay marriage will happen here unless we pass Proposition 8." The Proposition 8 slogan: "Protect Our Children. Restore Marriage."

The first time I saw these ads, I thought Proposition 8 was sunk: Is this the best the anti-gay marriage side can muster? An obviously tangential "Think of the children!" campaign? What's more, the ad is misleading: Although state law offers health-education guidelines for school districts to follow, it does not mandate a curriculum, and it explicitly allows parents to pull children out of any health classes they may find objectionable. In the summer, when the Proposition 8 campaign attempted to add language about schools teaching gay marriage on the statewide ballot pamphlet, a Sacramento Court found the claim "false and misleading."

But then, last week, a school in San Francisco arranged for a class of first graders to take a field trip to City Hall to toss rose petals and blow bubbles at their lesbian teacher's wedding. The trip, which has set conservative blogs on fire, seemed tailor-made to prop up the anti-gay marriage side's argument—San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom, whose cocky stand on the issue doesn't play well in other parts of the state, even officiated at the wedding. In May, Newsom told a cheering crowd of supporters that gay marriage is going to be legal "whether you like it or not," a quote that has ended up in ads by people who don't like it. Now the Proposition 8 campaign has a concrete example of schoolkids being forced to hew to San Francisco's gay agenda, and they're sure to pummel voters with that message in the days before the election.

From afar, California is often seen as a liberal haven. Sure, Bill Clinton won the state by 14 points in 1992, and ever since, the state's electoral horde—55 votes, 20 percent of the threshold necessary to win the White House—have been a lock for Democrats. Yet between 1952 and 1988, the Golden State burned bright red, voting for a Democratic presidential candidate only once (Lyndon Johnson in 1964). Nixon and Reagan—homestate boys—won handily, and in 1988, George H.W. Bush eked out a respectable margin. And voters here have a history of passing conservative ballot initiatives. Yes, we've legalized medical marijuana and funded stem cell research; but we have also severely restricted property taxes, denied medical services to illegal immigrants, prohibited affirmative action at public universities, and forced sex offenders to wear GPS tracking devices. Californians have twice rejected measures to require minors to inform their parents before seeking abortions, but polls suggest that the proposal will pass this year.

At least 11,000 same-sex couples have gotten married in California since the summer, and now many are rushing to get hitched before their fellow citizens close the door for good. Slots for gay weddings at San Francisco City Hall are booked through the election. Ceremonies take place every Friday. Whether those marriages will still be legal if Proposition 8 passes is a matter of intense legal debate. But for now, at least, watching the brides and grooms stream out of the rotunda is a wonderful way to spend the afternoon.

She returns...

It has been an extraordinarily long time since I last blogged and I have no excuse. I guess I’ve been too busy living to bother reflecting or informing. Slightly selfish, I’ll admit. But, dear god there are new developments… I’ll just take off and see where this leads.

First, my hagwon is going bankrupt. Wow! They are closing at the end of this month so
I have two weeks to find another job. The closing of the hagwon creates numerous problems and opportunities.

Problems...

1. I have only 9 more weeks left on my contract. No one will want to hire me for only 9 weeks.
2. The hagwon pays for my apartment so I’ll have to find a new place to live.
3. Without a job, I can’t save money. The whole point of moving here was to save money.
4. The hagwon pays for my cell phone. I’ll have to get a new phone.
5. The hagwon owes me salary for October. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.
6. The hagwon owes me my bonus for completing my contract. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.
7. The hagwon owes me a plane ticket home. The hagwon is claiming to be broke.

Opportunities...

1. I only have 9 more weeks left… I can work part-time and teach private lessons. With just a couple odd jobs I can triple my hourly salary and probably make even more money than if I stayed at the hagwon.
2. I’ll just see if they’ll let me pay for the next two months of my apartment. If not, I’ll find someplace else to crash. This problem is totally solvable.
3. Saving money? See Opportunity #1
4. No cell phone? So, I’ll buy a new cell phone. Or get my current phone put onto my credit card. Whatever.
5. They’ll pay me or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.
6. They’ll pay me or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.
7. They’ll buy the plane ticket or I won’t show up to work tomorrow and they’ll have to refund tuition.

BONUS Opportunities...

1. I was already planning on going to Thailand in November. And now, since I have all this time to do whatever I want, I think I’ll just extend my trip and go to Vietnam!
2. I work on Sundays, but now I won’t have to. Sundays are all mine again! Late brunch with tea and good company. That’s the very definition of Sunday.
3. I was going to go home three days after Christmas. Now, I’ll be home in time for Christmas.
3. Change! I like change. I was getting bored and dreading the next nine weeks, now I’ll be flying by the seat of my pants.

So, I think this whole situation is going to be a blessing in disguise.

In other news…
The value of the won is taking a nose dive. What a nightmare! It is down about 25% to the dollar since I arrived, so I’ve lost about 25% of the money I earned if I convert it to dollars. Since I am definitely coming back to Seoul to go to grad school, I’ve decided to leave as much as possible in won. I’ll take out a few million won for my trip home, but leave the rest in Korea and pray for a better exchange rate!

Grad School...
Applications are happening. I’m finishing them, turning them in and crossing my fingers.

Birthdays...
I turned 24. I am now a twenty-something... A mid-twenties kind of girl. I think 24 is going to be a good year. In fact, the year started out pretty great with a fantastic birthday celebration. It was a night of drinking, kissing and dancing.

First, the drinking. There was lots of it. But, the best part was the free drinks. I don’t think I paid for a drink all night. And I even had a couple strangers walk up and say “Someone told me it’s your birthday and that I should buy you a shot.” So, I kept being pleasantly surprised by a variety of fruity shots. But, since I have clever friends, the people bringing me shots were all handsome men. I don’t really remember any of their names, so I just started labeling them "Cute Boy #1""Cute Boy #2" and so on.

And now onto the kissing... What free shot would be complete without a kiss on the cheek? My cheeks got a lot of action. I even had a few ask if I'd kiss them on the cheek. And being drunk and flirty and 24, I was happy to oblige.

And finally, the dancing! We danced at Wolfhound. Others went to the club, but at Wolfhound they played Jailhouse Rock and Sweet Caroline and all the classics that everyone knows. I just sang along and let the good times roll. Besides, if I had gone to the club it would have just been thumping techno with no room to move. I needed room to dance and breath and rock!

But, before I move on... Let me share the wonder of Wolfhound, my favorite bar! Wolfhound has become the hangout for me and all my friends... We go there almost every weekend. There are a couple other popular foreigner bars, but this one is particularly cool because it is a little out of the way. You have to go off the main road and down a back street to get to it. And, more European, Australians and New Zealanders hang out there, so there are fewer rowdy and crass boys and more cute boys with accents. And, since our crowd always hangs out there, we’ve started to know the other “regulars.” We have a couple other groups of friends that we’ve met there and we can expect to see and hang out with whenever we go out. It has a real ‘Cheers- Where everyone knows your name” quality about it.

Speaking of “Where everyone knows your name...” About a block away from Wolfhound is Seoul Pub, which is my other favorite bar. One of the owners is named Junior and last time when my friends were in town we stayed out all night at Seoul Pub. They are open till 6am and we hung out with Junior, playing cards and darts until they shut the place down. So, now Junior knows me and whenever I come in he always says hello with gusto and plays my favorite songs. He lets me be the DJ and pick any music I want. Sometimes he’ll buy me and my friends a round of drinks “on the house.” It makes me feel like such a cool, hip gal who is “in the know.”

A few other random updates...

Song of the Moment: Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon
(This song has been on the top of my list for quite awhile now.)

Fall is here and I am in love. Crisp breezes. Gold leaves. Scarves.

A casting director approached me today on the street to be an extra in the movie “Beverly Hills Ninja 2.” They are filming here in Korea. Maybe I’ll call them. Why not, right? It could be my big break!

I fell down yesterday. I just fell over. I thought it was pretty funny, since falling down is a pretty infrequent occurrence. I mean, think about it... When was the last time you just fell down. Didn't trip. Didn't step on a shoelace. Didn't get bumped by another person. Just one minute you're walking. The next minute you are on the floor.

I really like Holly Flax.

Book I’m Reading: Lonesome Dove
(It’s Liz’s favorite book, so I said I’d read it. Actually, surprisingly good.)

Current Color of my Toenails: Chipped Gold

Current Color of my Mood: Yellow… with a hint of Leafy Green

Most Recent Reason to be Thankful: Billy Joel's Live Albums and English Breakfast Tea

Word of the Moment: Megalomaniac

Youtube Video of the Moment: Hey Sarah Palin”

All Dogs Go To Heaven...

http://www.burnie.com/church_fight.jpg

Wow. That killed me.

Three In A Row...

Having used the words of others for the last three posts, I've decided to finally add a few words of my own.

This past weekend was epic. It really was a blast in every sense of the word. I'll start at the beginning and see where I end up... So much to tell.

Well, the most noteable part of the weekend was having some cool guests. While in Hong Kong a few weeks back, Mike and I met a couple fun people. In particular a British guy who teaches English in Beijing. His specific VISA requires him to leave the country every thirty days and this month he decided to make the trek to Seoul. So, Nick and his flatmate, Luke came to see the sites and hang out in SK. They arrived late on Thursday night and we immediatly hit the bars with David and Kelly from work. Within a couple hours we met up with other pals and headed over to a giant fish market. The fish market is open 24 hours and it is HUGE. It is a giant warehouse with tanks and tanks of live fish for sale. There were giant shellfish and octopus and every kind of fish imaginable. Some of our Korean friends bought fish and we watched the fisherman actually pulled the fish out of the tank, whacked it on the head to kill it and then take a giant butcher knife and chopped off its head. It was pretty cool to watch. In another part of the fish market was a dining room and we all drank and ate the raw fish. However... there was one really interesting dish. Live octopus. The octopus was about the size of my hand and when I touched it, it moved and wiggled in the dish. I definitly had to try some. I pulled off an arm and it suctioned my tongue and my lip until I started chewing. It didn't have much of a taste, but it was really chewy. I got some good pictures. I'll be sure to post those later. We had such a good time drinking beer and soju that we didn't even realize what time it was until someone said, "Hey, I think the sun has already come up!" We finally left at 7:30 in the morning!

But, that was just the beginning. The next day Kelly, David and I were laughing at how tired and ridiculous we were for staying out so late. None of us had intended to party quite so hard and were each looking forward to going to bed early and recovering. And while David and Kelly were wise enough to follow through and get some sleep, when my Beijing friends called I decided to rally and hit the town again. We visited a bunch of my favorite haunts, but ended up at Seoul Pub where we closed the place down. As the pub cleared out, we bonded with the bartenders who gladly bought us more rounds and let us pick the music. I'm proud to say that I played every 'California' song I could find. California Love. California Girls. Californication. And, when I told him that I liked Jackson Browne he played "Doctor My Eyes" five times that night! Once again, I didn't mean to stay out so late. But, when I got in the cab the sun was just rising. It was a great time!

But, the weekend still wasn't over. Saturday was the semi and final debate rounds for the Korean tv show. So, after sleeping in and recovering from the previous night, I met up with David and we prepared for the debate. The topic of the first round was "Childbirth brings happiness to married couples." We were opposition and argued that their definition of happiness was too vague and naive. We also argued that childbirth and infancy bring incredibly amount of stress and anxiety, so while the experience may be positive overall, happiness is the wrong word to describe the experience. We won the debate so we went to the final round. The final round topic was "We should have a world government in the future." We were pro and made all the predictable arguments about how cooperation will solve problems. The other team suggested that hegemonic powers should solve problems. Obviously that is a pretty pathetic strategy, and we killed them. So, "The Scholars" are the Season 2, Face to Face champions! Hooray! After winning the show we couldn't just go home. We had to celebrate! We had a great time toasting to our good fortune and re-arguing all the debate topics. And, once again, we closed the bar down and went home at 6am.

So, this weekend was pretty jam packed. I can't remember the last time I went home when the sun was rising and I definitly can't remember a time I did it three nights in a row. But, I had a great time and I am glad I sacraficed the sleep.

On a side note... This past weekend has been just part of a series of really fun nights out with friends. A couple weeks ago I wrote my penpal an email explaining how I was very happy, but also very alone. I said that occassional lonliness was the price I pay for independence and freedom. But, these past weeks have somehow answered that "prayer." I've made a great new Navy friend, several new rugby friends and new people have been moving to and visiting Seoul. I suddenly have lots of people to talk to and spend time with. I am incredibly fortunate and have been reminded that the lonliness of independence really is only "occassional."

In short, I'm happy. I'm healthy. I'm energized and refreshed.

Dear Sen. Biden...

How To Debate a Girl, and Win
Joe Biden can beat Sarah Palin by pretending she's a man. And that he's not Joe Biden.
By Dahlia Lithwick

Dear Sen. Biden:

You have a problem. In less than a month, you will face off against Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin in a vice-presidential debate in St. Louis, and were you anyone but Joe Biden, it would likely be a rout. Last week, Palin proved herself a charming, confident, and gifted reader of speeches. But that doesn't change the fact that two years ago she was the mayor of a town of 6,000, crusading against dirty books at the local library. You are a six-term senator and chairman of the Senate foreign relations committee. World leaders routinely friend you, unbidden, on Facebook ("Wait … Is this the Angela Merkel?"). World leaders had never heard of Gov. Palin until last Friday.

That's your problem, Joe. Everyone expects you to win the debate, and to trounce her on the substance. But the rules for debating Gov. Palin are different. If you lecture her, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. If you act too smart, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. If you condescend to her, you'll be seen as a sexist bully. So this longtime parliamentary debater (and longer-time female) is going to humbly offer you a few tips on how to debate a girl.

Sen. Biden, let's be clear. Great Supreme Court oral advocates will tell you that a flawless oral argument will never win a case, but a bad argument can lose one. You have a similar problem. If you engage, fight, bicker, or bluster, you can lose this debate. Think Rick Lazio. So my advice, in a nutshell: Don't lose it.

Your real problem with Palin is not actually going to be her gender. Assuming you don't gaze fixedly at her breasts or ask her to fetch you a coffee, you probably won't do anything truly career wrecking on the sexism front. Your real problem is that Palin is not a serious candidate. I don't mean to suggest that she is not a serious person or even a seriously impressive first-term governor with real potential to shake up national politics. Nor do I want to imply for an instant that Palin is not a serious competitor. I just want to state here what you will be unable to say out loud at the debate: That by every obvious metric—experience, knowledge base, decades of public service, policy experience, understanding of the world—Palin is an unserious candidate for the vice presidency of the United States. And as any college debater will tell you, it's far harder to beat a clumsy opponent than a good one. (That's why you do better in your judiciary committee hearings with John Roberts than with Alberto Gonzales.) But if you even hint that Sarah Palin may be opining on the Israel-Palestinian peace process with something Piper pulled off Wikipedia that morning, you will look like a snotty professor lecturing an undergrad. And if you look like a snotty professor, you will come across as a sexist bully.

There is no easy way to tell you this, Joe Biden, but the surest way for Joe Biden to lose a debate against Sarah Palin is by being Joe Biden. If you are windy, pompous, unctuous, or pushy, you will come across as patronizing and condescending—the guy who puts the "boy" into "old boys' network." If you flirt and smirk and flatter (Did you truly tell an Ohio crowd you thought Palin was "good-looking"? Did you really introduce us to your wife, Jill, by leering that she is "drop-dead gorgeous"?), you're going to sound like the creepy guy in the trench coat at the back of the porn theater. If you can manage to be your warm, amiable self, even if you're going batshit on the inside, you will do fine.

And that's why the best way for you to approach Sarah Palin will be to forget that she is a woman. Tell yourself that she is a machine in 3-inch heels that has been programmed to make you look brutish and aggressive. She will attack, and you will smile. She will make jokes, and you will laugh. Do whatever you need to do—take four Percocet, deploy Zen breathing techniques—to prevent yourself from attacking this woman. And do just as much not to pay attention to her. Even if she pulls out her breast pump during commercials, keep your eyes glazed over on the middle distance. No compliments. Don't say you like her shoes. Just the facts, Joe.

You will need to match Palin point for point in the blue-collar-off. If she invokes her sister's gas station, bring up your cousin's Laundromat. (Try to locate one in the coming days, if you aren't in possession of one already). If she mentions the threshers, you need to see her the threshers and raise her the bailers. If she mentions the Washington media elite that hate her, you can truthfully tell her they've been calling you a blowhard for decades.

Caution: Sarah Palin is funny. And it's the kind of jeering Ann Coulter-funny that's assuredly going to irritate the heck out of you. She'll suggest you are a coward and unpatriotic and also (heh heh) that you are corrupt and dishonest. Keep your poker face. Poker face when she says you plan to raise taxes on the middle class. Poker face when she says she has plans to sell Barack Obama's next celebrity memoir on eBay and give all the money to special-needs children. Don't lunge (a la Lazio). Don't sigh (a la Gore). Don't roll your eyes (a la Where the Wild Things Are) or look longingly into the camera as if to plead "This is the best they could find for me?" Just nod sagely and refute logically. Get off a zinger if you can. ("You're nice enough Sarah" does not constitute a zinger.) But you are not going to beat her at the victim game, or the regular-folks game, or the humor game. You have to beat her on the fact that you are qualified to be a heartbeat from the presidency and that in 10 years she may be, as well.

Take a page from Campbell Brown's book and ask politely (and like you really want to know the answer and not just hear yourself say the question) what she learned while leading the Alaska National Guard into that war against Saskatchewan. But play to your strengths. Know stuff. Say it briefly. Don't accuse her of not knowing things. Just know more. An insanely successful college debate friend told me recently that the way he won against women was by always behaving like they were men.

My senior year in college, I debated in Glasgow, Scotland, against men who all stood up when I entered the room. One guy called me a "little flower" in the quarterfinals. Welshmen asked me to fetch coffee. What I learned from that experience was how deeply glad I was to live in a country where, for the most part, a woman can argue, tell jokes, kick ass, or get her ass kicked, just like a man. In 2008, in St. Louis, against a charming, cocky Alaska governor, that will only be truer. Thank goodness we live in a time and place in which nobody expects you to pull the chair out for your opponent or compliment her brooch, and nobody will be offended if you shake her hand firmly and pound her on national security. My best advice to you for dealing with Gov. Palin? Fight like a man. She will.

Sincerely,
Dahlia Lithwick

Excerpt...

San Francisco Chronicle
Mark Morford
September 3, 2008

Excerpt:

"So, on to the good news: A staggering 40 million Americans watched Obama deliver his spectacular, rain-free speech in Denver. That's more than the opening ceremony of Olympics. More than "American Idol." Half again as much as Kerry or Bush earned for similar speeches from years before and an all-time record for any televised political speech anywhere. What a thing.

And let's recall, for a moment, Obama in Berlin back in July, where nearly a quarter million locals turned up to see a man who wasn't yet even a world leader, but merely a candidate. Recall those stunning images of cheering throngs at the Victory Column, hundreds of thousands of eager, curious foreigners, all there to catch a glimpse not of Mick Jagger or the Pope, not of the Dalai Lama or Brad Pitt, but a brilliant young American senator.

That's not middling celebrity. That's not merely good PR on behalf of Obama's team. That's something else entirely, a world electrified by new possibility. Hell, McCain would be lucky to draw 100 onlookers to the airport Sheraton, and most of those would be EMTs.

Even Bill Clinton, with his effortless charisma and fantastic oratory skill, could never draw like Obama. This man fills stadiums. Electrifies not just Democrats, but entire nations. He has that rarest of political power, the ability to make people want to get out there and feel it, be part of the shift. Bush gave the world hives. McCain gives the world the creeps. Obama gives the world goosebumps. Simple as that.

You gotta admit, amidst all the GOP scandal and meltdown and Obama's revitalizing, meteoric rise to international beacon of change -- a guy who, in Joe Biden's words, has "grabbed the lightning" like no one he's ever seen before -- it's tempting to say even God has abandoned the religious right.

Then again, it's probably far more accurate to say She was never really over there in the first place."

Judging Sarah Palin

Editorial
Chicago Tribune
September 2, 2008

This surely wasn't how Sarah Palin intended to tell Americans that, if elected, she’d be not only the first woman to serve as vice president, but also the first grandmother. On Monday, though, Palin disclosed that her not-yet-wed, 17-year-old daughter is five months pregnant. That word answered a tide of speculation on Internet blogs that a Palin daughter, and not Palin herself, had given birth to Trig, the family’s Down-syndrome baby; Palin, you see, must have faked a pregnancy to protect the daughter’s reputation.

But Palin's disclosure only prompted new waves of Web speculation: that the governor is a bad mother, that with two babies around she’d be too busy to serve as vice president, that she must have pressured her daughter not to simply have an abortion.

Whew. This rush to judge Sarah Palin—a woman whose name most Americans first heard just four days ago—is breathtaking. No, there has been nothing suspicious about either pregnancy in Palin's family. Time magazine's Nathan Thornburgh reported Monday that in their home town of Wasilla, Alaska, her daughter's situation "was more or less an open secret. And everyone was saying the same thing: The governor's 17-year-old daughter is pregnant, the father is her boyfriend, and it's really nobody's business beyond that."

Given the withering and deeply personal onslaught she's endured, Gov. Palin may feel like the loneliest woman in America.

She's not. Many families confront the difficult consequences of choices that young people make. Palin says her family will welcome and shelter her grandchild just as they've welcomed and sheltered Trig and her other kids. Judge me not by the situation I've been handed, she’s essentially saying. If you must judge me, judge me by how I try to respond.

That's a message sure to resonate with parents and grandparents who have watched teens in their families make decisions that were irresponsible, or irreversible, or, in the most tragic cases, life-ending or otherwise irredeemable. As one Wasilla resident, a woman who has a son fighting in Iraq and another who survived a head-crushing workplace accident, told the reporter from Time, dealing with life’s real dangers "makes you realize that a thing like a little teenage pregnancy isn't such a big deal. Bristol—and lots of other girls like her out there—are going to be just fine."

We’ll see—which by one measure is unfortunate in its own right: Teenage parenthood is difficult enough in near-anonymity. Imagine how many people will be waiting to judge Bristol Palin, mother. Just as people now are judging Sarah Palin, mother.

Barack Obama is having none of that, threatening to fire any campaign staffer advancing the attacks on Palin’s family. "People’s families are off-limits," he said Monday. "And people's children are especially off-limits. This [situation] has no relevance to Gov. Palin’s performance as a governor or her potential performance as a vice president. You know, my mother had me when she was 18, and how a family deals with issues and teenage children, that shouldn’t be a topic of our politics."

But, of course, it is. The question is how the rest of us now deal with it: by dismissing Palin as damaged goods—or by giving her the opportunity to impress or disappoint us over the next two months.

We can judge what she has or hasn’t achieved: Her inexperience in foreign affairs, for example, rivals that of John Edwards, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney—three men Americans seriously considered as candidates not for the vice presidency, but the presidency itself.

And we can watch her cope with the same household vicissitudes many parents face.

Judging Sarah Palin will be America’s parlor game from now until Nov. 4. She asked for scrutiny when she agreed to run alongside Republican John McCain. Bring it on. But the rest of us can temper our unfolding discoveries about this would-be vice president with what they tell us about her judgment and character. That’s what matters:

We have seen Obama acknowledge his youthful use of illicit drugs. We have heard John McCain confess that his own immaturity destroyed his first marriage. We have watched Joe Biden’s career suffer from disclosures of plagiarism in law school and in his 1987 campaign for the presidency.

Most Americans who've spent time assessing those personal difficulties have decided that none of these men's pasts disqualifies him to serve as president.

Sarah Palin’s record as governor, and her prospective performance as vice president, are fair game. Her family's struggles are not. If there's a conclusion to be drawn, it's about those sometimes difficult consequences of decisions that young people make. If Gov. Palin helps the rest of us advance that lesson to the teenagers in our lives, she'll deserve our gratitude rather than our sneers.

Books and Rings...

No news is good news. And I have no real news. Things are fine at work. The weather is cooling and still raining. (My favorite kind of weather.) I'm making new friends who are uber cool. I'm going back on Face to Face, the debate tv show, for the semi-finals on Saturday. And while none of that is very exciting, I am reading some pretty good books.

I'm actually reading about three books at the moment. And I'm trying to branch out from American and British authors. A few weeks back I read a newspaper article that explained that the majority of books that are translated into foreign languages are originally written in English. Therefore, your average English speaker and reader is less likely to read works from foreigner authors because there are fewer foreign authors translated to English. I think this is a huge disappointment. Culture is translated through literature. And while it is always preferable to read literature in its original language, my inability to read other languages makes that impossible. Therefore, I'm trying to settle for the next best option and look for foreign authors translated to English. And recently I think I've found a couple of gems.

The first is called "Piercing" by Ryu Murakami, a highly acclaimed Japanese author. I've only just begun, but the first few chapters gave me the same sick-to-my-stomach sensation that gripped me when I read American Psycho. A successful, young Japanese man is compelled to murder weaker beings. The most vulnerable potential-victim being his own infant daughter who he watches every night with an ice pick in hand. The terrifying premise is obviously quite dark, but it has a truly Dostoevsky feel to it so I'm going to keep reading.

The next is equally dark, titled "I Have The Right To Destroy Myself" by Young-Ha Kim. I'm especially drawn to the nameless narrator of the book. Set in Seoul, the narrator guides the reader through a tragic and complicated love story while glorifying suicide. And the presentation of the story is incredibly compelling. Some characters have names, some simply are distinguished by letters and professions. I'll be sure to write more as I turn more pages.

The last book I'm reading, and the one I am closest to finishing is called "Anansi Boys" by the English author Neil Gaiman. It is fantastic! It revolves around two brother, one of whom is an American god. Gaiman has created an entire mythical world based on a combination of Greek, Roman, Chinese and Native American mythology. It's fascinating to see an entirely unique fictional culture derived from non-fictional traditions. I'm thoroughly enjoying the book.

Now that I have actually taken the time to describe these books, I'm realizing that I seem to have developed a dark, disturbing trend. I should mention that my literary choices aren't always so severe. I recently read the entire David Sedaris collection and laughed so hard I almost stopped breathing. I highly recommend his "Naked." I also indulged in "Possible Side Effects" by Augusten Burroughs who was equally hilarious, though slightly more depressing. And of course, my reading selections aren't always so lengthy. I'm more than happy to settle for the incredibly sexy and slightly vulgar word-smithing of my favorite columnist, Mark Morford. (www.sfgate.com/columnists/morford) Read it. You'll love it. Or at least lust for it.

Alright. For the two and half people who actually read this blog, feel free to add your reading recommendations.

Ah... and before I forget! Huge shout out to my best friend who is GETTING MARRIED! That's right, her Air Force guy popped the question! I guess giving up California and moving to Texas was worth it. (If you've seen the ring, then you definitely know it was worth it!) And with the engagement I'm finally giving up on the idea that she'll ditch her guy and come hang out with me in Seoul! Congrats Cynthia and Demetri!

American Women...

Two women. Two parties. One election.

Someday I'm going to be a mother, an aunt, a godmother or neighbor to a little girl and I'm going to tell her that I actually saw it happen. It happened in my lifetime.

18 million cracks in the ceiling and a VP nomination.
Right or left. Red or Blue. It's a good day to be an American woman.

Blog Burner...

Over the past month I have had to take a break from my kindergarten classes in order to teach summer school for my full-time hagwon. Most students are on summer break from their schools and therefore attend more classes at our private academy. But, the summer intensive schedule is over and now I am back to normal work hours, and back to teaching my kindergarten students.

Having been gone for a month, I didn't expect most of the students to remember me. Foreign teachers are a commodity and come and go frequently in Korea. Not to mention, my students are about five years old. They grant their loyalty to whichever teacher brings stickers to class. So, when I arrived at work yesterday morning and heard little feet pattering behind me I didn't pay much attention. But, it was like munchkins appearing to surround Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. Kids would just find parts of me to hug. One had my arm, while another had my leg. Little Mike smelled my hair while Grace tried to put a sticker on my shirt and Ella wanted a high-five. Mose remembered the song I taught him and started singing it to me. And this was just in the first few moments from when I walked in the front door and down the hall to the teacher's room. When I finally went to my classes, a lot of the kids wanted to show me things. Michelle (7 years old) lost her two front teeth. Kai (5 years old) finally picked an English name and wanted me to say it out loud. And Chloe (4 years old) just looked up at me when I walked in and started giggling so hard she fell over. It was the absolute best welcome-back I have ever received!

In other news, I keep a journal. (Let me be clear, I do not keep a diary. Diaries have plastic locks and pink pages. I keep a journal) A few years back I started re-reading some of my entries and came within inches of shredding entire pages. The stuff I wrote was so stupid and juvenile that I never wanted to read the entries again, let alone run the risk of having anyone else ever find them and read them. But, instead of burning the pages and burying the ashes deep underground I made the rule that if I write something in my journal, it stays. No “hindsight is 20/20” editing. So far, I’ve been pretty good about following the rule. I have corrected a few spelling mistakes and written bits of commentary on past entries But, overall I’ve been quite the self-enforcer. I bring this up because I’ve recently cross-applies the rule to this blog. Having re-read a variety of entries, I've become tempted to edit. For example, my recent post regarding my plea for a phone call. I can't help but ask myself, "Really, Jacki? Really? You really wanted to post on the world wide web that you were waiting by the phone for a boy to call?” I think the answer to that question is pretty obvious. Nonetheless, I wrote it. I posted it. So, now it might as well be written in stone. It stays. As does everything else. I will not be editing.

Moving on... Biden rocks. More on that later.

Phone call....

Uber cute man asked for my number. Tall. Dark curly hair. Dimples. Sarcasm. Self deprecation. Gentleman. Text messaged me within hours of meeting.

I actually want him to call me. Seriously. This NEVER happens. I really want him to cal l me. Please call. Don't be stupid. Just call me.

Whatever. I'm lame. I know.

TV Star...

I'm on a national Korean TV show. It is ridiculous with loud colors and sound effects. It is the very definition of "cheesy." But, it was also uber fun and just another awesome Korean story!

For your viewing pleasure...

http://www.arirang.co.kr/Tv2/Tv_Video_On.asp?
PROG_CODE=TVCR0397&code=Po5&sys_lang=Eng

(It is suppose to be just be one long website link, but it is too long so you have to cut and paste both sections of the website address. Sorry)

Click on the credit cards debate.
Log in: jevans2002
Password: 1234

A few things you should laugh at or ask yourself...

1. Slogans. What game show would be complete without forcing the teams to come up with awkward names and even more unnatural slogans?

2. Wow, what an enthusiastic audience! There seems to be only 20 people in the entire audience, but they cheer so loudly! Ah, the joy of sound effects.

3. What an interesting scoring method. I'd love to know how they come up with the point system! Funny you should ask that... Me too! (The judges pick the winner and then the show just makes up fake points in order to have something to show on the screen. Mystery solved.)

4. Finally, I thought Jacki was a good debater. What happened? Well, the answer to this one is a bit more tragic. She seems to have developed an unhealthy addiction for the ridiculous verbal filler "we would argue." She is seeking professional help and has taken the first step toward recovery by admitting that she does, indeed, have a problem.

In short, when you laugh at me, try and pretend you are laughing with me.

Enjoy.

Not Dead...

My mother wrote me an email checking to make sure I am still alive. My best friend and I have exchanged one email in the last month. And as my good friend Lindsey (so eloquently) put it, "Your blog blows."

So, I'm back. And it is about time.

I've got a month or so worth of good stuff to post so I'll just start typing and see where it goes.

First, I have a really bright third grader in one of my classes. Her name is Jina and she smiles, volunteers to answer questions and really makes an effort. She's great. In class a couple days ago someone asked me if I had a boyfriend. This is a pretty common question, since gender stereotypes are still prevalent in Korean culture. As a result, most of my students are very interested in whether I have a boyfriend, want a boyfriend or am married. My typical answer to this question is that I do not just have one boyfriend, I have ten boyfriends! This response usually gets a laugh and then I can get back to a more appropriate subject matter. But, on this particular day while everyone was laughing at my oh-so-clever response, Jina announced (quite proudly) that she doesn't need a boyfriend because she is a strong girl.

YES! YES! YES! Yes, Jina! Way to defy the thousands of media messages directed at pre-teens! I was so proud of her. And yet despite my glee, I decided that a celebratory dance and wild declaration of, "Take that you, vicious media scum!" might be a bit much. So, I just gave her a subtle high-five and agreed that she is, indeed, a strong girl.

Yes!

Speaking of boyfriends, my old semi-kinda-whatever-boyfriend from Austria sent me a nice email the other day. He seems to be enjoying himself and is glad to be back home. I told him the story of how I actually went drinking with an Austrian girl while in Hong Kong and was able to make an authentic Austrian toast with her. She was (obviously) quite impressed.

Onto other news, this Wed I went out drinking and dancing with a bunch of debaters that are in Korea for a debate workshop. It was crazy fun. Not only are debaters great drinkers! They are shamelessly awesome. I danced with a couple of debaters from Ghana and Kenya. There were cool American and Korean debaters that I know from other groups. I had a nice chat with a Iraqi Kurd who was happy to defend America's involvement in the Middle East. And all of that, doesn't even include the Chinese and Pakistani debaters who showed me a thing or two about poker and taught me a swing dance move. Wow! What a night!

Another great part of that night was having a drink with Matt Stanard. Stanard is one of the most respected debate coaches in the US and the directer of one of the most respected debate programs. I have always been in awe of his debaters.

However, before I continue with my Stanard story, let me make a quick side note. I have never been an excellent debater. I was a good debater. I loved it more than anything else I've ever done. And if you could divide debaters into "excellent" "good" "fair" and "poor." I made it to the top of the "good" category. I was better than a lot of other good debaters and every now and then I would wiggle my way into the lower-rankings of the "excellent" category, but I have to admit that I just couldn't hold my own with that crowd.

Back to the story... Stanard coached and continues to produce debaters in the "Excellent" to "Off-The-Charts" categories. I just assumed he had no idea who I was or where I came from. I couldn't imagine ever making his radar. But, when I was getting introduced to him, he already knew who I was! He even remembered what school I had debated for. And we just chatted. Nothing special. Nothing life altering. I bought him a beer. Nonetheless, it was surreal. I wish I could better explain why that interaction was so note-worthy. But, maybe it's just simply because the moment made me feel note-worthy. Like my rare moments of excellence might have been worth remembering.

Okay... I could go on because I have a lot more. I am on a national Korean debate TV show. (I'll post the link.) I am starting my grad school apps. Obama is going to announce his VP any second. The way Koreans have responded to the Olympics is awesome. I went on a date with an underground street fighter/ former Canadian coke dealer.

But, that will all have to wait. I'm out of time.

Stay tuned... More to come.

HK...

I'm still in HK. Really good times.

We started the trip by seeing the sites. Museums, tourists attractions and plenty of other interesting locals. But, after a few days Mike and I decided to start relaxing. We switched hostels and took the "tourist" element down a couple notches.

There are lots of observations I'd love to include about the people, city and traveling in general, but I'm hot and tired and ready for a nap. (What a crazy gal I am!)

I'll write more later, but for now I have to say we've been fortunate to have met some cool people. The guys running our hostel are awesome. They're from Africa and incredibly generous. At a pub a couple night ago we ran into a cool British guy who teaches English in Beijing and getting his VISA for the Olymipcs. We met a nice Austrian girl who is traveling around the world.

All is well.

Hong Kong (without any of the good stuff)...

I'm in Hong Kong. It is hot and humid and wonderful! All at the same time. I want to write more and detail my experience, but I'm off to do fun things and don't have a whole lot of time.

So, just believe me when I say... Great city. Great times.

Oh... and I have about 5 posts that are in the "draft" stages that I've never actually finished. So, I'm hoping to drop some knowledge in the next few days when I finish and post the posts. But, just to give you a taste of the good stuff to come... I was on a Korean game show! No, really.

Digression...

"Digression is the soul of wit."

My father often asks for the “reader's digest version” of my stories. My long-winded nature and tendency to digress and pursue tangents is well-known in my family. My father's request for a "reader's digest version" is an (often futile) attempt to keep me on track.

But, I was reading Bradbury’s afterward to Fahrenheit 451 and he beautifully defended digressions. Claiming that digressions are not only the soul of wit, but they are the sunshine, the life and the soul of reading. I couldn't agree more.

I remember reading Salinger's The Catcher In The Rye and being entirely bored by the “crumbly” Holden Caulfield as he wandered the streets on New York complaining about every person he met. But, I reached Chapter 22 and my heart stopped, my lungs were void of air and I cried. It was as though I was meeting Holden Caulfield for the first time and the pain of the character was overwhelming. I realized the digressions of the book, the conversation with the nuns, the phone calls to old girlfriends, the writing in the bathroom stalls, were more than just “excessive” descriptions of a young boy’s adventure. They were manifestations of emptiness, confusion, and a longing to return to unaltered happiness and innocence. And most importantly, in Holden's mind, they were what waited for any child who Holden couldn't save from the cliff's edge.

The digressions of the book were the soul and sunshine of the novel.

Wow. I really do love that book.

Car Wash...

You've heard the story of the country folk who decide to go to town. They get up early, bathe and brush their hair. They put on their Sunday best and try to look their most presentable. They say "please" and "thank you" and do their best to be respectful.

Today I went to the bank to make an international transfer. I got up early, showered and curled my hair. I ironed my prettiest dress and put on make-up. I didn't consciously plan all this out, but it felt like I should look presentable and respectable today. However, now that I think about it, I know why. I didn't want to give anyone a reason to judge me. I could just as easily wear jeans and my Reefs, but if I wear a dress and curl my hair, maybe I'll be less likely to be labeled, "just another stupid foreigner." Of course, I realize how silly this is, but I am the ONLY white person in the entire building. I have never transferred money internationally and even if I had, I am entirely helpless unless someone can speak my language. It's like I'm a country bumbkin in a big city!

While at the bank I experienced one of my least favorite elements of being a helpless foreigner. I call it, "The Crowd." I started speaking to one clerk, then another came over to assist. These two clerks were followed by another. By the end I had between three and five clerks helping me and speaking Korean around me. There are a few reasons I dislike this. First, I feel guilty to trouble all these people. FIVE people had to stop what they were doing to help the ONE person who came to their country and doesn't speak the language! Every other person in the bank requires one person to help them. I require FIVE! It feels selfish and arrogant. Second, I don't know what any of these people are saying. They are speaking around me and I don't know how to respond. Sometimes they will throw in a few English words and look at me, but I miss the English words because I am so lost in the Korean. I don't know how to be polite. Do I pay attention to the speaker despite having no idea what he is saying? Do I look at the listener and try to discern if he understands the instructions and will be able to help? Or, do I sit quietly, examine the ground and try and wait until they need me for something? I just don't know and usually do a combination of all three; my gaze drifting from speaker to listener to the chipped nail polish on my toes. The last reason why I dislike this is that I have to rely on body language. The vocal tone of the Korean language is so different from English that there is no way for my discern emotion in the volume and tone of the words. So, instead I rely on body language to gauge the attitude of the people around me. One woman looked so helpful. She sat forward and smiled and pointed at things I needed. Another man slouched in his chair, would speak Korean/English at me and then look away and slightly roll his eyes if I didn't understand him the first time. The original clerk didn't smile, worked diligently and just pointing at places I needed to sign or fill in account numbers. And the mixture of attitudes puzzled me. Should I be apologetic? Friendly? Quiet and professional? Most often when I am unable to discern the proper response to a situation, I simply follow the lead of the other people in the situation. But, in these "crowd" moments... WHO DO I FOLLOW?

In the end, I was successful at the bank. I transferred the money and all ended well. There was one more funny moment. At the bank, instead of being able to electronically transfer the money, I had to actually go over to the ATM and withdraw the cash and give it to the clerk. So, I had to withdraw 5 million won, which is about $5000. However, the largest bill they have is a 10 thousand won bill, which is about $10. So, I had to walk across the bank lobby with 500 bills. There was a little part of me that wanted to throw it in the air like confetti, start ghetto dancing and singing Jim Jones... "We fly high. No lie. You know this. BALLIN'. Foreign Rides. Outside. Just like showbiz." But that was one of the many urges I chose to ignore. Nonetheless, 500 bills in your hand, even 500 $1 bills still feels pretty good.

For your viewing pleasure, I've decided to share the video. Jim Jones "We Fly High."



Onto other subjects...

Wow... I am weak sauce. All flavors of weak sauce. I was at tap class today and am learning a new move. I hop from foot to foot, but have to do a double tap (called a "slap") when I hop. This doesn't sound hard, but I have to keep my knees bent and together, my feet have to be controlled by my ankles (and not my knees) and unless I can get my toe to point upward (which I still can't!) I'm not able to get the double tap. I end up kicking the floor instead of slapping it. Not to mention, my heels aren't allowed to touch the ground, so it is all on my toes. There are so many little parts to this simple move... toe up, back straight, ankles together, no heels, stay balances, keep the rhythm, hands on hips. And this is the only move I did for two hours. My calves and butt burned! And all I could think was "PULL IT TOGETHER, JACKI!" So, I just kept hopping and slapping, hopping and slapping.

Last week I learned another move I like a lot more! It is a flap-ball-change, but it includes a turn. So I do a 360 flap-ball-change while moving forward. It is a really fun move because my feet get to twist and stomp in fancy looking patterns. That move was so fun to learn that I didn't even realize two hours had passed. Of course, fun moves that don't hurt are rare. However, on days like today when the new steps burn and I think about how I'd rather be taking a nap on my Sat afternoon instead of hopping from left foot to right, I hear Christina Aguillera's song "Carwash." That song will be the song for my tap routine! And the faster I learn all these smaller steps, the quicker I'll get to put them together into a routine! Now, that will be FUN FUN FUN!

And for further viewing pleasure... Christina Aguillera "Carwash."

Ipods...

My ipod has become an intregal part of my daily life. I don't go anywhere without it. I listen to it constantly. I'm always downloading entire new albums and putting my ipod on shuffle, never really knowing what I'm going to hear next. Of course, I've got all my classic favorites... The entire discography of Jackson Browne, Billy Joel, New Found Glory, Panic at the Disco and Rolling Stone's collection of the 500 greatest songs of all time which includes everything from The Clash, Lynard Skynyrd, The Police, and Prince, to The Shangri-Las, The Sex Pistols and Simon and Garfunkle. It is quite an eclectic mix.

But, last night I took my ipod to a new level!

It was the last night out with the Austrian and he wanted to go to B1... I hate B1! It's a kinda lame bar that has almost no room to dance and bad techno music. But, the European guys wanted to go so I tagged along! After a couple drinks and a sincere attempt at enjoying myself, I started getting annoyed. Not just tired, but annoyed! The whole scene was lame and contrived. I was in uncomfortable shoes. It was hot and the music felt like I was pounding my head into the wall... over and over and over. And then, I had a brilliant idea! I pulled out my ipod, turned up the volume and started rocking to my own tunes! It was awesome! It was like my own private dance party... I had the lights, the drinks, and with enough elbowing and pushing I was able to make my own mini dance floor. AND... I could sing along to my own music! Amazingly, my feet suddenly stopped hurting, the heat seemed inconsequential and my mood improved dramatically! Not to mention, the ipod became a catalyst for attracting new dancing partners! People would do a double take. It would take them a second to realize... wait, why is she listening to an ipod when there is already music playing? So, then I'd share my ipod with them and we'd dance to my music for awhile.

Like I said, taking my ipod to a new level!

In other news...

This was the last weekend with the Austrian. He was here for about two months and we dated pretty consistently for the two months. It was a nice time. And the best part was the laid back, casual nature of the entire thing. It was easy, probably because there was always a set expiration date. No worries about the future. No false expectations. No concern for "where is this going?" Just good company, lots of good food and wine and some pretty interesting conversations. And so today with a kiss goodbye, we parted ways. Another friend from another part of the world. Here are a couple pictures from this past weekend.



However, there are parts of my life that aren't changing... I still LOVE my tap class. Wow! It is great. I am getting a little better every time I practice, I can see it. It doesn't seem like tap would be that hard, but most people don't attempt to move their feet in such a specific and controlled manner. Tap is all about moving your feet using your ankles, not your knees. So, tap dancers have to move the toe, heel and ball of their foot in quick and calculated succession in order to make distinct sounds and movements. It is a really fun feeling when you can hear the beat of the music and get your feet to make just the right sound. I've started a new movement where I tap backwards and I'm having some trouble... but I'll get it! Oh, I'll get it!

Speaking of dance, I think I am going to sign up for another dance class. There is a dance studio in Itaewon that caters to foreigners and it has all sorts of Latin classes, and swing lessons. The swing lessons are on Saturdays, so I could go to my tap class from 1-2:30 and then to the swing class from 3:30-5:00. Awesome!

And finally... the weather. Oh, dear god! It is hot and humid. It is so hot that if I just stand outside I sweat through my clothes. In fact, it is about 10:00pm here and it is 80 degrees with 80% humidity. There are glass doors on the front of my school and the air conditioned room and the hot exterior are causing the windows to fog up! During my dance class, the room gets so hot that sweat drips off my face and body as I dance. The glass mirrors get fog all around the top and we drink gallons of water! In short... It is hot!

America...

I really love my country.

Cars...

Did you know...?

Did you know that in Korea all the cars have small phone number stickers in the front windshield?

Since people park so tightly and in such strange locations, the phone number is on the car so you can call and ask the person to move their car if it is blocking you in or is parked in an inappropriate location.

Important Days...

I think I missed the big day... My six month anniversary! Can you believe it? Six months in Seoul! It feels funny because the amount of time I have left on my contract is shorter than the amount of time I've been here. My goodness...

However, there are a few other big days I want to highlight...

First, the Fourth of July is coming and this will be my first Independence Day outside of the country. I love the Fourth of July, it is easily one of my favorite holidays. So, I will definitely be wearing red, white and blue this Friday! I'll find my own way to celebrate!

Second, and more important than the others... My dad's birthday! I really miss my dad. When I went home a few weeks ago, we'd find odd times to just sit and talk. I'd wake up early because I was still on Korean time and he'd be up stretching. We'd end up sitting in the office until he had to go to work. Another time, I went to lunch at the clubhouse and was sitting out on the secluded porch, but he found me and we'd talk for an hour or two. While my mom is without a doubt, one of my best friends, I really am beginning to think that I am secretly a daddy's girl.

Maybe not so secretly... It's just that I think most everything about my dad is really cool. I like his stories, his music, his jokes, his advice, his artwork, his movies, (most of) his books... And as I get older I find myself adopting more and more of his favorite as my favorites. I'm sure some shrink could come up with a complex theory about my subconscious and some deep need to garner parental favor, but I think it is far more simple than that. My did is just really great and the more I grow up, the more I realize he's been that way all along!

And let me add one more story... If only because I don't ever want to forget it. When I arrived home a few weeks ago I met my mom at the house. Dad was at work, but we planned on meeting him for lunch at the clubhouse. After chatting with mom, we were running ahead of schedule and drove over to meet him at his office. It was a new office I'd never seen, so I climbed the stairs not sure where I was going. But, I heard my dad's voice and peaked around the corner. I didn't want to interrupt his conversation with one of his staff, I just wanted to wave and let him know I was there when he was ready to go. But, he saw me and stopped his conversation mid-sentence. His whole face looked happy. His face went from night to day. He smiled, he bounced. And I was so so so happy to see my dad. It was my favorite part of my entire trip home.


I don't think my pops reads this blog, but just in case... Happy Birthday Dad! You're the best!

I Don't Think I Can Dance...

I had my first tap lesson last night! It was fantastic! I've taken tap before, but never like this. In the past, the instructor is always trying to teach you something right away so you can feel a bogus sense of accomplishment. But, this instructor has no interest in that. She is about technique. I spent almost two hours taping my toe; knees bent, back straight, chin up, hands on hips and trying not to move a single muscle above my ankle. I kept my heel one inch off the ground and tried to pull my toe as far upwards as possible so that I could see the tap on the bottom of my shoe in the mirror. This sounds far easier than it is... My shins burned as I tried with all my might to get my toe up and then do a quick tap followed by a hard flap. (Taps and flaps are not the same!) And after four eight counts on one foot, I'd switch. In most other classes they'd have you doing shuffles and a simple shuffle-heel-toes by the end of class so you could feel like you are "really learning to tap." Instead, I learned to tap my toe... Over and over and over again. And I still looked like a lopsided, drunken flamingoish-bird while doing it. BUT... BUT... BUT... It was awesome! More fun than I knew what to do with! I can't wait till my next lesson on Saturday!

On a quick side note... If I take one thing away from my experience in Korea, it will be the understanding of what it feels like to be a minority. I was the only non-Korean in the class. Wow. I keep thinking I'll get used to it, but when I walk into a new room and a dozen pair of eyes turn to look... I realize that the "deer in the headlights" feeling may not be something you ever get used to.

But, the second lesson I'll take is that people are capable of incredible warmth and kindness... no matter what language they speak. At the end of the class I had to stand in front of everyone and show what I learned. (Seriously, I stood in front of the class and tapped my toe! That's it. Toe up. Toe down. FOR EIGHT COUNTS!). But, the really hard part was introducing myself. Since I was new I had to say my name, and I also added that I was from California.Then I didn't know what else to say. I was puzzled and nervous and frozen... But, some random Korean guy gave a friendly cheer/holler and started enthusiastically clapping for me. I felt like I'd been rescued by a stranger. And as the class ended and all the groups and friends left together I walked out alone and a bit intimidated from the whole experience, but as I turned up the street someone yelled, "Goodbye. Goodbye." I turned to see some of the tappers were going in the other direction, but called after me to say goodbye.

It's great to be different. But sometimes it's nice to feel the same.

Before I wrap this up, I have to share a deep secret... My guilty pleasure television show is "So You Think You Can Dance." I can't help it! I understand the ridiculousness of summer reality television. I know there are about a thousand other activities that could better entertain and stimulate me, but I am hooked! And, normally I'd never let anyone in on this little secret... But, I just about flipped out with last night's episode.

There was one dance performance where the pair captured a range of emotion that captured me and made me hold my breath. It was beautiful and bittersweet. A man attached to his work. A woman attached to the man. Her pain and rage at her own dependence and inability to walk away. His cold composure as he prioritizes his work and still is able to take her heart right out of her chest. Dance is artwork.

Watch the ending, where he walks away. Her complete rage. It's like she is enclosed and trying to break her way out of an emotional prison. Her anger seems all consuming, but it isn't anger at him, it's anger at her own vulnerability and attachment to a man she knew would disappoint her.

Oh... and I like the pop song. Sue me.

See if you see what I see... (The dance starts at about 2:45.)

Adorable Overload...

Speaking of dance...

After six months of searching, I found tap dance lessons! They are cheap. They are close and I started tonight. I'm a bit tired, so I'll write more about the lesson later.

But, the real reason I'm posting is that I just HAD to share this picture.

It's Chris and Mike. Chris, the boy who gave me a spontaneous hug and told me "No Goodbye," is in the green shirt. The other boy is Mike, the heart breaker who keeps smelling my hair, kissing me on the elbow and whispering sweet nothings in my ear, "I like Jacki Teacher."

That sure is one hell-of-a-lot of adorable!

Dance...

I was just thinking about what I'll do when I spend a month or two in Buenos Aires. I just figured it out... Dance lessons. Dancing and dancing and dancing. Tango lessons. Tap lessons. Ballroom lessons. Yes! Yes! Yes!

Feminism...

Living in Korea I have been insulated from most of the political commentary surrounding the primary season. I had to search for it, mostly from newspapers and online sources. And the distance resulted in my missing most of the rampant sexism surrounding Hillary Clinton's candidacy. But, now that Hillary Clinton has left the race, the issue of sexism is being included in the post-game analysis. And while I supported Obama, the discussion surrounding Hillary Clinton has left me feeling simultaneously saddened and livid.

I'm deeply saddened by the news media. I expected sexism when Hillary became a legitimate presidential candidate. But, even with these expectations, I was still too naive and optimistic. I expected the sexism to be from older generations, and I expected it to be subtle. I expected newscasters to only hint at stereotypes, out of fear of becoming too politically incorrect. But, I couldn't have been more wrong. Comparisons of Clinton to a nagging spouse, to an ex-wife outside of probate court, to Lorena Bobbitt, to a sexless monster, to Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" and to dozens of other awful female caricatures, highlighted the lack of fear the news media felt. The media caters to it's audience. If the viewing audience was offended by sexist remarks and bigotry, then the news media would have steered clear. In short, they knew their audience and they weren't worried. That saddens me.

It also infuriates me because I am a woman. And the people with podiums and illusions of credibility who disseminate "truth" and "fact" have created impossible expectations and a double standard. They have decried women for being too emotional and moody, but mocked strong and powerful female decision makers. They have claimed a fear of a female candidate focusing on "women's issues" while refusing to acknowledge that any issue that affects half a county's population should be the concern of the entire population. And even worse, they have failed to ever apply the same standard to male counterparts; never questioning the legitimacy of a male's candidacy based upon his "men's issue" agenda. These media faces and voices have a national podium from which their words seep into homes, classrooms and minds. Their total failure to recognize the impact of their rhetoric is appalling and vile. Hundreds (literally hundreds) of studies have shown that words drastically influence the way we identify, humanize and treat one another. There is no doubt that just a few select words used to label another as different or inferior, results in others altering their treatment according to the description. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. And so I am infuriated when I hear newscasters using hateful and derogatory words that cast a vision of females as "others." Furthering that rhetoric, further perpetuates the prophecy.

Feminism is about respect.
It isn't about being the same.
It's about being equal.
Four quarters and a dollar.

Job Security...

Well, good times at the hagwon!

I’ve mentioned that there has been a bit of disruption at the school.
It’s getting worse.

All of my classes have fewer students. Three months ago I taught 12 classes. I had about 6-9 students in each class. I now teach 9 classes. Each of my classes has about 4-6 students. In one of my classes I have one student. In another I have only three. This decrease in students didn’t seem like a big deal. The hagwon has had waves of students as they come and go. But, recently the students are going and I don’t see them coming back. But, even worse, the staff are leaving also. Our principal was fired about three months ago. The two top Korean teachers quit. We had two or three directors come and work for the hagwon, only to quit within a few weeks or days. One of the foreign teacher’s contract expired so he went back to his home country. And about a week ago the director of the school, the top administrator, stopped coming to work. No one knew where she went, but today it was official… She quit. Things aren’t looking so good here at the hagwon. A new director arrived today, but there is no guarantee that he will stay. In fact, he has never run a hagwon before so I am a bit skeptical. In short, the school has seen brighter days.

But, I should note… I am not worried. If the hagwon shut down tomorrow, I would be more than fine. Job security is not an issue when you are an English teacher in Korea.

On a brighter note, some of my students are adorable. One of them, Mike, is five years old and today he held my hand and pulled me close to the ground so that he could talk to me. He had to get right next to my ear so that I could hear him, he said just barely loud enough for me to hear, "I like Jacki Teacher." Yep... That's me! Jacki Teacher Extraordinaire!

Back. Baby. Back...

There is no explanation for why I haven't written. The world was turning, but I just didn't get around to writing about any of it.

But, there is plenty going on...

This morning I was teaching at the elementary school. When I first started working there I only taught a few classes and there were two other foreign teachers. Last week both of those teacher's contracts expired and they went back to their home countries. The director of the school asked me to join their staff as a full time employee and teach a few more classes. No problem. Now, I teach at two different hagwons. I teach grade school and middle school in the afternoon and three classes of 5, 6 and 7 year olds in the morning. But, despite spending most of my time with the older kids in the afternoon, most of my fun stories come from the younger kids.

The class of six-year-olds is the my most trying class. There are 12 students, 10 boys and 2 girls. And, you haven't seen chaos until you have tried to lead 12 six-year-olds, who don't speak English in a craft using crayons, scissors and glue sticks! At all times at least half of the students need my immediate and undivided attention. And while six students are vying for my attention and approval, the other six are usually taking advantage of the moment and looking for ways to cause destruction and bodily harm to one another. It is quite a balancing act.

But, the best part of the class is the distinct personalities that emerge amidst the bedlam. For example, the lovesick Tiara. Tiara at the ripe, old age of six is infatuated with one of the former teachers, James. She draws hearts and pictures for him and I realized today that she doesn't really understand that James isn't coming back. It was a bit sad. She asked, "James Teacher?" which in her limited English meant, "Where is James Teacher?" I explained that James was gone. The language barrier prevented a fuller explanation and I don't think it sank in. I could sense her disappointment, but as she resumed her coloring I suspected it wouldn't be long before Tiara finds a new man in her life! And as for me, I think I am going to be a bit of a heart breaker as well. One of my six year olds has been smelling me. He especially likes to smell my hair and today he finally made his move... He kissed my arm. That's right, a stolen kiss on the elbow... Talk about romance!

But, what is even better than a kiss? I'll tell you what's better... a hug. Before I leave class everyday, I always practice greetings with the students. "Hello." "How are you?" "I am fine. Thank you." And I always end the lesson with "Goodbye." As the end of class neared, I sat in my mini chair (Oh yeah, I sit in one of the tiny, three foot tall, wooden chairs!) and started the usual greetings. Before I got to the end one of the boys shouted, "No goodbye!" I smiled and said, "Yes goodbye!" Looking distraught, he shouted "No goodbye!" He got up from his chair, walked over and put his arms around my neck to give me a long hug. And that, ladies and gentlemen was the best part of my day. At 10:45am, I could have just packed up and gone home, because it doesn't going to get any better than that.

Of course, I also have the more unique personalities. One of the boys, loves to clean. Whenever we do crafts he rushes to finish his project so that he can get the little plastic broom and dustpan and start cleaning up all the paper scraps. He lives to clean! Another one of the boys, Victor, is the class clown. He loves to only finish coloring half of the page and then hand it to me with a clever look in his eye. I always act playfully astonished and say "No color? No. No. No." And hand it back to him and he cracks up. He just giggles and giggles.

I could go on and I will eventually tell you more stories... After all, I spend my mornings sitting on the floor, surrounded by miniature people, coloring, singing the Itsy-Bitsy-Spider song and making funny faces. There is definitely a lot of blog material there!

But, onto other news. Mad Cow Disease. Holy smokes! These people are angry! Angry! Angry! For those of you who don't watch, read or listen to the news, or for those of you who just live in a cave (but somehow have internet access to read this blog), the new president of South Korea has just re-negotiated to allow the United States to import beef. South Korea has refused to allow US beef since 2003 due to a fear of Mad Cow Disease. After US beef got a clean bill of health from the WTO last September, the new South Korean president decided to lift the importation ban. This has resulted in hundreds of thousands of people protesting, resignations from most all members of the president's staff, approval ratings even worse than Bush's and pressure for him to leave office. Did I mention that these people are angry? Of course, much of the anger is based on sensationalism and faulty information. Imported beef has turned into a hot-button issue, surrounded by half-truths and rumormongering. But, the new President isn't making things easier for himself. He has failed to provide accurate information to the public and has accepted weaker safety restrictions than both Taiwan and Japan have demanded for imported US beef. In my opinion, the Mad Cow Disease issue shouldn't be this heated. But, the relationship between the United States and South Korea is in the midst of many changes and the anger over Mad Cow Disease may be an outlet to vent some of the rising steam. Here is a short article that summarizes a few other issues South Koreans have with the US. http://www.toledoblade.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080614/OPINION02/806140316

On a loosely related note, it is important to keep in mind the unique relationship between North and South Korea and the United States. There are 35,000 US troops still stationed in Korea, just a few miles from the DMZ. President Bush calls North Korea, a rogue state and a member of the Axis of Evil. But, the US considers South Korea a valuable trading partner. In 2007, America provided 11.7 percent of South Korea's imports and bought 14.5 percent of its exports. Despite the US's condemnation of North Korea, most South Koreans don't see North Korea as an evil twin. Instead, they see it as a long lost brother and seek reunification. They see North Korea as part of Korea and blame the United States and other outside actors for dividing their country. A relationship like that is bound to cause conflict. So, I think the US beef importation issue is further fueled by deep seeding, historic US resentment.

Okay. Okay. I'll wrap this up. This blog is getting long and a probably a bit too heavy.

But, before I go, a quick shout-out to two of my loyal readers. These guys actually read this blog. No kidding. And last weekend they made big news... They got married! I couldn't be there, but from the pictures and video (already posted on Facebook!) it was beautiful and fitting for this good-humored pair. Congratulations Brian and Lindsey. You are both genuinely wonderful people. I am a better person for knowing you and thrilled for you both!